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“Thankful” by Caedmon’s Call (40 Acres Album)

20 May

“Thankful” by Caedmon’s Call

I ran across an old box of letters
While I was bagging up
Some clothes for Goodwill
You know I had to laugh
That the same old struggles
That plagued me then
Are plaguing me still
I know the road is long
From the ground to glory
But a boy can hope
He’s getting some place
But you see, I’m running from
The very clothes I’m wearing
And dressed like this
I’m fit for the chase

No, there is none righteous
Not one who understands
There is none who seek God
No not one, no not one

I am thankful that I’m incapable
Of doing any good on my own

‘Cause we’re all stillborn
And dead in our transgressions
We’re shackled up
To the sin we hold so dear
So what part can I play
In the work of redemption
I can’t refuse, I cannot add a thing

‘Cause I am just like Lazarus and
I can hear your voice
I stand and rub my eyes
And walk to you
Because I have no choice

I am thankful that I’m incapable
Of doing any good on my own
I’m so thankful that I’m incapable
Of doing any good on my own

It’s by grace I have been saved
Through faith that’s not my own
It is the gift of God and not by works
Lest anyone should boast

Dear God, I think most people–Christians and non-Christians alike–can relate to this song. Why do I still have the same struggles? Again, this group has very poetic lyrics that say so much more than the words that are used.

I ran across an old box of letters
While I was bagging up
Some clothes for Goodwill
You know I had to laugh
That the same old struggles
That plagued me then
Are plaguing me still

It is amazing how there are just some things that plague me. Insecurities. Vindictiveness. Lust. Selfishness. Gluttony. The same old struggles that plagued me then are plaguing me still.

I know the road is long
From the ground to glory
But a boy can hope
He’s getting some place
But you see, I’m running from
The very clothes I’m wearing
And dressed like this
I’m fit for the chase

So am I trying to run from who I am? Do I have it wrong? Am I trying too much under my own power to address these issues instead of just embracing the place where you have me now and accepting your grace?

No, there is none righteous
Not one who understands
There is none who seek God
No not one, no not one

I am thankful that I’m incapable
Of doing any good on my own

I was in a meeting yesterday and I felt compelled to point out to the participants at the end that a lot of the good fortune we had discussed during the meeting had come from you and wasn’t really due to any of our own brilliance or even hard work. It was just you honoring our prayers. I hope it didn’t come across as too holy or fake because my desire to glorify you and not us was genuine.

‘Cause we’re all stillborn
And dead in our transgressions
We’re shackled up
To the sin we hold so dear
So what part can I play
In the work of redemption
I can’t refuse, I cannot add a thing

Born into sin. From our first breath we are about ourselves and about survival. But this part about the part that we “play in the work of redemption.” There is nothing I bring to it except repentance and submission.

‘Cause I am just like Lazarus and
I can hear your voice
I stand and rub my eyes
And walk to you
Because I have no choice

It’s interesting to draw this comparison to Lazarus’s resurrection. He had no choice. He was dead and gone and you called him back. Presumably (at least on this side of the dividing line) you didn’t ask his permission (or opinion) to bring him back. You just did it because you wanted him back. I wonder what the rest of his earthly life was like.

So the fact that I am submitted to you now–does that mean I was destined to be here? How much choice did I have. Or was I just involuntarily drawn to you?

It’s by grace I have been saved
Through faith that’s not my own
It is the gift of God and not by works
Lest anyone should boast

Father, thank you for saving me through means beyond anything I could accomplish. Thank you that I cannot point to anything within me that has brought me here, but that I can simply rest in you. There is so much more freedom and peace in just accepting you instead of performing for you. It makes loving you a lot more fun. Help me to love you well. Oh, and I am very sorry for the sin I still hold so dear.

In Jesus’s name I pray,

Amen

 
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Posted by on May 20, 2020 in Caedmon's Call - 40 Acres Album, Hymns and Songs

 

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“There You Go” by Caedmon’s Call (40 Acres Album)

19 May

“There You Go” by Caedmon’s Call

Is this the strange feeling of you
Working all for good
Cuz I am so confused
I don’t even ask for what I should
When I asked for a deserved stone
You broke and gave your body as bread
And even the stone dropped down
And rolled away, spoke of the one who bled

There you go working good from my bad
There you go making robes from my rags
There you go melting crowns from my calves
There you go working good of all I have
Cuz what I have is not that bad

When I ask for a deserved serpent
You gave a net full of fish
Even the serpent that told the lie
When lifted high foretold the gift

There you go working good from my bad
There you go making robes from my rags
There you go melting crowns from my calves
There you go working good of all I have
Cuz what I have is not that bad

For you so loved the unlovable
That you gave the ineffable
That who so believes the unbelievable
Will attain the unattainable

There you go working good from my bad
There you go making robes from my rags
There you go melting crowns from my calves
There you go working good of all I have

There you go
There you go
There you go
There you go
Cuz what I have is not that bad
It’s not that bad

Dear God, I thought I’d never get this one started. I had the hardest time getting the formatting of the lyrics correct.

I think I’m going to start a series on most of the songs from Caedmon’s Call’s 40 Acres album. The songwriting is very poetic.

This is the first song and the references to scripture are all over it. I wonder if a lot of Christians who are not as familiar with the Bible would miss them. Probably.

Let’s see what kinds of scripture references we can figure out for this one:

Is this the strange feeling of you working all for good?

Romans 8:28 – And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose.

When I asked for a deserved stone you broke and gave your body as bread

Matthew 7:9 – “Which of you, if your son asks for bread, will give him a stone?”

Matthew 26:26 – “While they were eating, Jesus took bread, and when he had given thanks, he broke it and gave it to his disciples, saying, “Take and eat; this is my body.” 

Matthew 27:50-51a – And when Jesus had cried out again in a loud voice, he gave up his spirit. At that moment the curtain of the temple was torn in two from top to bottom.

And even the stone dropped down and rolled away spoke of the one who bled

I’m actually not sure what this is referencing. Judges 9 when a woman drops a stone on Abimelek? I don’t know. Obviously, a stone was rolled away at the tomb when Jesus was resurrected, but I’m not sure what they are referencing here.

When I asked for a deserved serpent you gave a net full of fish

Matthew 7:10 – Or if he asks for a fish, will give him a snake?

Even the serpent that told the lie, when lifted high foretold the gift

Genesis 3:4-5 – “You will not certainly die,” the serpent said to the woman. “For God knows that when you eat from it your eyes will be opened, and you will be like God, knowing good and evil.” 

Numbers 21:9 – So Moses made a bronze snake and put it up on a pole. Then when anyone was bitten by a snake and looked at the bronze snake, they lived.

John 3:14 – “Just as Moses lifted up the snake in the wilderness, so the Son of Man must be lifted up, that everyone who believes may have eternal life in him.”

For you so loved the unlovable that you gave the ineffable. That who believes the unbelievable can attain the unattainable.

John 3:16 – “For God so loved the world that he gave his one and only Son, that whoever believes in him shall not perish but have eternal life.”

Romans 6:23 – For the wages of sin is death, but the gift of God is eternal life in Christ Jesus our Lord.

There you go working good from my bad.

Romans 8:28 – And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose.

There you go making robes from my rags

Isaiah 64:6a – All of us have become like one who is unclean, and all our righteous acts are like filthy rags. 

Matthew 6:28-30 – “And why do you worry about clothes? See how the flowers of the field grow? They do not labor or spin. Yet I tell you that not even Solomon in all his splendor was dressed like one of these. If that is how God clotes the grass of the field, which is here today and tomorrow is thrown into the fire, will he not much more clothe you–you of little faith?” 

There you go making crowns from my calves

Exodus 32:1,4,19-20 – When the people saw that Moses was so long in coming down from the mountain, they gathered around Aaron and said, “Come, make us gods who will go before us. As for this fellow Moses who brought us up out of Egypt, we don’t know what has happened to him…He took what they handed him and made it into an idol cast in the shape of a calf, fashioning it with a tool. Then they said, “These are your gods, Israel, who brought you up out of Egypt.”…When Moses approached the camp and saw the calf and the dancing, his anger burned and he threw the tablets out of his hands, breaking them to pieces at the foot of the mountain. And he took the calf the people had made and burned it in the fire; then he ground it to powder, scattered it on the water and made the Israelites drink it. 

1 Corinthians 9:25 – Everyone who competes in the games goes into strict training. They do it to get a crown that will not last, but we do it to get a crown that will last forever.

 

Father, I think it all circles back to the first line of the song:

Is this the strange feeling of you working all for good? Cuz I am so confused, I don’t even ask for what I should.

My eyes can lie to me. My intuition and intellect are foolish. My comprehension is short-sighted and shallow. So I can look around and see things I don’t like, but I will 1.) try to see what you are actually doing that maybe I’ve missed, and 2.) simply have faith that there are things I cannot see that are part of your plan. And maybe I’ll never see the good or understand your plan on this side of life. That’s okay. I trust you. I believe these scriptures. I believe Jesus. I believe your Holy Spirit. I believe you.

In Jesus’s name I pray,

Amen

 

 
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Posted by on May 19, 2020 in Caedmon's Call - 40 Acres Album, Hymns and Songs

 

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Fathers of the Bible — God

17 May

15 All the tax collectors and sinners were approaching to listen to him. 2 And the Pharisees and scribes were complaining, “This man welcomes sinners and eats with them.”
3 So he told them this parable: 4 “What man among you, who has a hundred sheep and loses one of them, does not leave the ninety-nine in the open field and go after the lost one until he finds it? 5 When he has found it, he joyfully puts it on his shoulders, 6 and coming home, he calls his friends and neighbors together, saying to them, ‘Rejoice with me, because I have found my lost sheep!’ 7 I tell you, in the same way, there will be more joy in heaven over one sinner who repents than over ninety-nine righteous people who don’t need repentance.

8 “Or what woman who has ten silver coins, if she loses one coin, does not light a lamp, sweep the house, and search carefully until she finds it? 9 When she finds it, she calls her friends and neighbors together, saying, ‘Rejoice with me, because I have found the silver coin I lost!’ 10 I tell you, in the same way, there is joy in the presence of God’s angels over one sinner who repents.”

11 He also said, “A man had two sons. 12 The younger of them said to his father, ‘Father, give me the share of the estate I have coming to me.’ So he distributed the assets to them. 13 Not many days later, the younger son gathered together all he had and traveled to a distant country, where he squandered his estate in foolish living. 14 After he had spent everything, a severe famine struck that country, and he had nothing.[e] 15 Then he went to work for one of the citizens of that country, who sent him into his fields to feed pigs. 16 He longed to eat his fill from the pods that the pigs were eating, but no one would give him anything. 17 When he came to his senses, he said, ‘How many of my father’s hired workers have more than enough food, and here I am dying of hunger! 18 I’ll get up, go to my father, and say to him, “Father, I have sinned against heaven and in your sight. 19 I’m no longer worthy to be called your son. Make me like one of your hired workers.”’ 20 So he got up and went to his father. But while the son was still a long way off, his father saw him and was filled with compassion. He ran, threw his arms around his neck, and kissed him. 21 The son said to him, ‘Father, I have sinned against heaven and in your sight. I’m no longer worthy to be called your son.’
22 “But the father told his servants, ‘Quick! Bring out the best robe and put it on him; put a ring on his finger and sandals on his feet. 23 Then bring the fattened calf and slaughter it, and let’s celebrate with a feast, 24 because this son of mine was dead and is alive again; he was lost and is found!’ So they began to celebrate.
25 “Now his older son was in the field; as he came near the house, he heard music and dancing. 26 So he summoned one of the servants, questioning what these things meant. 27 ‘Your brother is here,’ he told him, ‘and your father has slaughtered the fattened calf because he has him back safe and sound.’
28 “Then he became angry and didn’t want to go in. So his father came out and pleaded with him. 29 But he replied to his father, ‘Look, I have been slaving many years for you, and I have never disobeyed your orders, yet you never gave me a goat so that I could celebrate with my friends. 30 But when this son of yours came, who has devoured your assets with prostitutes, you slaughtered the fattened calf for him.’
31 “‘Son,’ he said to him, ‘you are always with me, and everything I have is yours. 32 But we had to celebrate and rejoice, because this brother of yours was dead and is alive again; he was lost and is found.’”
Luke 15nger worthy to be called your son.’
22 “But the father told his servants, ‘Quick! Bring out the best robe and put it on him; put a ring on his finger and sandals on his feet. 23 Then bring the fattened calf and slaughter it, and let’s celebrate with a feast, 24 because this son of mine was dead and is alive again; he was lost and is found!’ So they began to celebrate.
25 “Now his older son was in the field; as he came near the house, he heard music and dancing. 26 So he summoned one of the servants, questioning what these things meant. 27 ‘Your brother is here,’ he told him, ‘and your father has slaughtered the fattened calf because he has him back safe and sound.’
28 “Then he became angry and didn’t want to go in. So his father came out and pleaded with him. 29 But he replied to his father, ‘Look, I have been slaving many years for you, and I have never disobeyed your orders, yet you never gave me a goat so that I could celebrate with my friends. 30 But when this son of yours came, who has devoured your assets with prostitutes, you slaughtered the fattened calf for him.’
31 “‘Son,’ he said to him, ‘you are always with me, and everything I have is yours. 32 But we had to celebrate and rejoice, because this brother of yours was dead and is alive again; he was lost and is found.’”
Luke 15

Dear God, I’ve been waiting to get to this one because this one is you. I almost didn’t want to categorize this as “Fathers of the Bible” because you are so much more than my father. You are more than what Adam was to Seth, Abraham was to Isaac, or even Joseph was to Jesus. But Jesus used this father to describe your love for me so I thought I would take some time to see who this father is and what I can learn from you about where my priorities should be as a father to my own children.

First, I suppose I can look back and see consistency in this description of you and how you treated your people in the Old Testament. You gave them freedom. You gave them rope. You allowed them to go their own way and you would hear their cry when they came back to you. Over and over again, you really were this father. I’m surprised I haven’t heard more preaching or teaching about this, but it’s true. With very few exceptions, it’s true.

Second, I wonder if we haven’t mistitled this parable. Should it be, “The Father with Two Sons,” because this is about how you handle all of your children, not just those that act out in rebellion? In fact, this reminds me now of the master who hired people throughout the day and gave them all the same wage regardless of what time they were hired. That parable was about you too. You are not just the father of the prodigal. You are the father of all of us, and we all have a unique relationship with you.

So now let’s look at this parable. This might actually be a multi-day prayer because I don’t want to gloss over any parts of the story. But here are some thoughts about this whole chapter at first glance

  • It’s interesting that Luke is the only one who gives us this story. It’s not in the other two synoptic gospels.
  • Much like John 3:16 is part of a rant that Jesus goes on with Nicodemus, this parable is one of three told in conjunction with one another and they should all be considered together when looking at the context.
  • I might be getting too specific here, but we’ve always thought of Jesus telling the tax collectors and sinners this story as well as the Pharisees and scribes, but when verse 3 says, “Then Jesus told them this parable:” it’s a reference to the Pharisees and scribes muttering about him being around the sinners. Luke’s intimation is that this was directed not at the sinners, but squarely at the Pharisees and scribes.
  • In all three stories, something is lost, and then there is a celebration when it is found. Not just relief, but exuberant joy!
  • Each story intimates that the lost one who returns gives you more joy than the righteous that stays. It makes me wonder what kind of rejoicing there was in heaven in the Old Testament times when Israel would repent and return to you.
  • The third story about the man with two sons is much more complicated than the first two. I suppose stories involving people would be inherently more complicated than stories involving a lamb or a coin.

So what can I surmise about you when I combine these three parables with who you exhibited yourself to be during the Old Testament times?

  • You really like us and want us around. You value our presence! You miss us. It’s not just that we worship you. Yes, in each case, you are the authority (over the lamb, the coin, or the son), but when they return you don’t demand anything in the moment. You just celebrate.
  • Your agenda for us seems to be for our good. You want us around because you know it’s better for us if we are with you. The lost sheep will surely die on its own. The coin will never live out its purpose. And the son will die in misery and spiritual/emotional emptiness. When all three return, your joy is centered around the fact that it is good for them that they returned. And your joy is complete in their wholeness and the restoration of relationship.
  • In terms of the story of the father and his two sons, your ego doesn’t play a role in your responses to the boys. You allow them to rebel. You allow them to insult you. You honor the concept of free will that you gave us all the way back to the beginning. This might be the biggest difference between you as a father and me as a father. None of your decisions appear to be based on how what is happening will impact you. Everything appears, instead, to be centered on how it will impact your sons.
  • Jesus seems to imply that you are more interested in the state of our heart than the words we’ve conjured up. The younger son was broken and had come home to submit to his father’s authority. That’s all the father needed to know. That’s all you need to know. It’s not about what fancy words I conjure. There isn’t anything magical I can produce to earn your forgiveness. There was no way for the son to atone for his sins, but you weren’t looking for atonement. You just wanted repentance, humility and submission. And you knew that this son was now set for a better life after having come to this point.
  • Then there’s the older son. I’m sure the Pharisees (the audience for this parable) were tracking with Jesus and maybe even buying into the idea that you would celebrate the return of the younger son. Maybe they were starting to soften their stance on Jesus trying to evangelize and bring to repentance the tax collectors and sinners. But much like Chekhov’s gun, Jesus had planted an almost forgotten character in the story who must be addressed. He wasn’t just a character of virtue and obedience to contrast with the younger son. He had his own issues.
  • Forgetting the lesson that Jesus has for the Pharisees in his decision to link who they are with this older son, I want to look at much at how you responded to the older son as I did this younger. And it’s pretty simple. Only two verses (31 and 32):

“My son,” the father said, “you are always with me, and everything I have is yours. But we had to celebrate and be glad, because this brother of yours was dead and is alive again; he was lost and is found.”

Again, I think I’ve read this wrong over the years. I’ve always thought of this little speech as a scolding, but that’s not what Jesus says. He represents you as sayin to the Pharisees, “Hey, you have been good and everything I have is coming your way. But I love that person over there. They are my child to. You referred to him as ‘this son of [mine].’ Well, he isn’t just my son. He is your brother. It’s time for you to love him and celebrate with me because he is alive again. He was lost and now is found.” Jesus wasn’t taking anything away from the Pharisees and scribes that day. He was imploring them to join him in reaching out to and loving these tax collectors and sinner. He wanted them to welcome them.

So what does this have to say about me and who I am as a father? What can I learn from you, my Lord and my God?

  • Not always, to be sure, but I have probably made too many parenting decisions based on how their behavior impacts me, my ego, my feelings, my reputation, etc.
  • While it is good for me to reach out (see the shepherd looking for the lost lamb or the woman looking for the lost coin), it is also right for me to let them come to conclusions on their own. Especially as adults, I cannot force my will upon them.
  • Sibling rivalry is real and I need to deal with each of my children differently while still loving both equally. And if I can somehow get them to have empathy and even mercy for the other–at least a wishing for the best for them–then that should be pursued.
  • You never lightened the consequences for the rebel. Whether it was the Israelites in the Old Testament or the son in this story, you never made the results of his actions easier on him. As a parent, it is very hard to watch our children suffer, even if they brought it upon themselves. But if we get in the way then it can short circuit whatever lesson you might have for them in the experience.
  • You are their father as much as you are mine. Since they are adults now, at this point, I am their spiritual brother and I should care more about their relationship with you than their relationship with me. Yes, they still need the love that an earthly father can give as long as I am alive, but this is no longer about them submitting to me. My goal should be for them to submit to you.

Father, it looks like I ended up doing this all in one sitting after all. Thank you for being who you are. Thank you for being the God you are. Jesus could have taken this parable in a lot of ways, and I’m grateful for the portrait he painted of you and for me to follow. Help me to be the son you need me to be for your glory’s sake and not mine.

In Jesus’s name I pray,

Amen

 
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Posted by on May 17, 2020 in Fathers of the Bible, Luke

 

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Mothers of the Bible — Mary, the Mother of Jesus (Part 17)

16 May

12 Then they returned to Jerusalem from the Mount of Olives, which is near Jerusalem—a Sabbath day’s journey away. 13 When they arrived, they went to the room upstairs where they were staying: Peter, John, James, Andrew, Philip, Thomas, Bartholomew, Matthew, James the son of Alphaeus, Simon the Zealot, and Judas the son of James. 14 They all were continually united in prayer, along with the women, including Mary the mother of Jesus, and his brothers.
15 In those days Peter stood up among the brothers and sisters—the number of people who were together was about a hundred twenty—and said, 16 “Brothers and sisters, it was necessary that the Scripture be fulfilled that the Holy Spirit through the mouth of David foretold about Judas, who became a guide to those who arrested Jesus. 17 For he was one of our number and shared in this ministry.” 18 Now this man acquired a field with his unrighteous wages. He fell headfirst, his body burst open and his intestines spilled out. 19 This became known to all the residents of Jerusalem, so that in their own language that field is called Hakeldama (that is, “Field of Blood”). 20 “For it is written in the Book of Psalms:
Let his dwelling become desolate;
let no one live in it; and
Let someone else take his position.
21 “Therefore, from among the men who have accompanied us during the whole time the Lord Jesus went in and out among us— 22 beginning from the baptism of John until the day he was taken up from us—from among these, it is necessary that one become a witness with us of his resurrection.”
23 So they proposed two: Joseph, called Barsabbas, who was also known as Justus, and Matthias. 24 Then they prayed, “You, Lord, know everyone’s hearts; show which of these two you have chosen 25 to take the place in this apostolic ministry that Judas left to go where he belongs.” 26 Then they cast lots for them, and the lot fell to Matthias and he was added to the eleven apostles.
Acts 1:12-26

Dear God, it’s a little vague to me whether or not Mary, the mother of Jesus, was with Mary Magdalene at the tomb after the resurrection, but it’s clear that she is with the apostles now. And her sons re there too. They’re in. They are ready to acknowledge that their brother was unique. They were wrong to have tried to get him out of that house. I wonder if Mary’s sister was there too. So many questions.

This is our last reference to Mary in the New Testament, but I think we can assume she was with them just a little while later for pentecost, and she was part of the church. After all, John was responsible for her now (although I would imagine Jesus’s brothers were more on board with taking care of her now too).

So sometime between the desperate sorrow and loss of the crucifixion and this moment, picking a replacement for Judas, she found out he was alive again. I’m sorry, I didn’t do that justice: HE WAS ALIVE AGAIN!! What an amazing moment that must have been for her. Her life went from being invalidated to validated. Everything good she believed about him was affirmed, and everything she doubted was erased.

I was thinking about this story last night as I went to bed, and I thought of a song I first heard back around 1986. It was by a singer who is deceased now named Luke Garrett. I think it might have been written by the Gaithers. It’s called, “Then Came the Morning.” The second verse and subsequent chorus are about Mary’s experience that weekend:

The angel, the star, the kings from afar, the wedding, the water, the wine. Now it was done, they’d taken her son. Wasted before his time. She knew it was true. he watched him die too. She heard them call him just a man. But deep in her heart she knew from the start somehow her son would live again.

Then came the morning! The night turned into day. The stone was rolled away. Hope rose with the dawn. Then came the morning. Shadows vanished before the sun. Death had lost and life had won, for morning had come.

Now, I’m not necessarily buying the part that she knew deep in her heart he would live again in bodily resurrection any more than I believe Princess Leia knew all along that Luke was her brother. But I completely track with the idea that she was confused and hurt. But then came the morning. That’s what this is all about. The morning came. Your plan came together and she lived to see it. Joseph didn’t live to see it, but she did. What a sweet gift you ended up giving her.

Father, there are things for which I pray every day that I have faith you will grant. Things mainly involving my children. And I may live to see them come about, but maybe I won’t. That’s okay. It’s about your timing and not my ego. It’s about your plan being made perfect and not any agenda I try to lay on top of it. So I give this to you, and if I’m not around to see the “morning,” then so be it.

In Jesus’s name I pray,

Amen

 

 
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Posted by on May 16, 2020 in John, Mothers of the Bible

 

Mothers of the Bible — Mary, the Motherof Jesus (Part 16)

14 May

Standing by the cross of Jesus were his mother, his mother’s sister, Mary the wife of Clopas, and Mary Magdalene. When Jesus saw his mother and the disciple he loved standing there, he said to his mother, “Woman, here is your son.” Then he said to the disciple, “Here is your mother.” And from that hour the disciple took her into his home. After this, when Jesus knew that everything was now finished that the Scripture might be fulfilled, he said, “I’m thirsty.” A jar full of sour wine was sitting there; so they fixed a sponge full of sour wine on a hyssop branch and held it up to his mouth. When Jesus had received the sour wine, he said, “It is finished.” Then bowing his head, he gave up his spirit. Since it was the preparation day, the Jews did not want the bodies to remain on the cross on the Sabbath (for that Sabbath was a special day). They requested that Pilate have the men’s legs broken and that their bodies be taken away. So the soldiers came and broke the legs of the first man and of the other one who had been crucified with him. When they came to Jesus, they did not break his legs since they saw that he was already dead. But one of the soldiers pierced his side with a spear, and at once blood and water came out. He who saw this has testified so that you also may believe. His testimony is true, and he knows he is telling the truth. For these things happened so that the Scripture would be fulfilled: Not one of his bones will be broken. Also, another Scripture says: They will look at the one they pierced. After this, Joseph of Arimathea, who was a disciple of Jesus—but secretly because of his fear of the Jews—asked Pilate that he might remove Jesus’s body. Pilate gave him permission; so he came and took his body away. Nicodemus (who had previously come to him at night) also came, bringing a mixture of about seventy-five pounds of myrrh and aloes. They took Jesus’s body and wrapped it in linen cloths with the fragrant spices, according to the burial custom of the Jews. There was a garden in the place where he was crucified. A new tomb was in the garden; no one had yet been placed in it. They placed Jesus there because of the Jewish day of preparation and since the tomb was nearby.
John 19:25-42

Dear God, there are some things in this story I never noticed before. The first thing is that Mary’s sister was there. Jesus’s aunt. I’ll get back to that in a second.

As I’ve been focused on Mary for the previous 15 prayer journals to you I’ve come to see this whole experience through her eyes as a parent a little more vividly. So the first thing that came to my mind as I read this story yesterday and today is, “Well, this isn’t how this was supposed to work out at all.” What a devastating day! It’s one thing to lose your son, but it’s another to lose him so violently. And even more to have lost the man who was supposed to be the Messiah! She saw this coming. She saw the track he was on from at least the time she and his brothers tried to get him and take him home. This just wasn’t going how she and Joseph foresaw it after they visited with the angels, Zechariah and Elizabeth, the shepherds, Simeon and Anna, and the wise men. I’m sure she and Elizabeth talked a lot about who their boys would be when they grew up, and now they were both dead–killed brutally.

I’ll bet she wished Joseph was there to hold her. I wonder what kinds of conversations she and her sister had had over the previous 34 years. I’m sure the early years were filled with home and wonder. Perhaps big dreams and Israel’s liberation and conquering power. Then, in recent years, concern that this was all unraveling. Perhaps this was too much for her son. Maybe he had lost his mind. Now they stood there together, Mary possibly feeling loved by her sister, but also maybe a little judged. How embarrassing to have this happen to your own son.

And if you’re Jesus, looking down, you see your mom, your aunt, and then John–apparently the only disciple that had the nerve to show up. It doesn’t mention that Jesus’s brothers were there. Regardless, I think it’s safe to say that Jesus didn’t trust them because he made John responsible for his mother’s care. I’m sure their relationships were pretty strained and frayed by that point. Perhaps they were angry with Mary for supporting Jesus. I don’t know. It’s all conjecture, but the picture is pretty clear. She is standing there with her sister, Mary Magdalene, still another Mary who was married to someone names Clopas, and John. Her son’s life is over. And it sure looks like it was all a waste of time–Bethlehem, the stable, the rumors and innuendo, the flight to Egypt, the children slaughtered in Bethlehem, raising him… Now it was all over and all she had left was to live out the rest of her life.

Of course, we now have the advantage of knowing that that isn’t the end of the story, but let’s just sit with Mary in the seeming failure for another day or two. Sometimes as parents we just don’t know what is going on with our children. I talked with someone today whose son ended up failing out of their first year of college. It just didn’t work. His mother homeschooled him, and so she, at least in part, feels like it’s an indictment against her and how she prepared him for college. He feels like a failure. His father feels it too. But maybe this is a door that you needed to close for him to find the path you have for him. Maybe, like Mary, they simply can’t see what you’re doing. I know I’ve certainly had to embrace that level of faith sometimes with my own children.

Father, help me to be at peace with the fact that sometimes things just don’t go according to my plans because my plans can be vain, shortsighted, and foolish. In fact, help me to let go of my plans and simply look to you in this moment of this day, thank you for what you done that I can see and that I can’t see, and then be at peace in your presence. Let me give my utmost for your highest, regardless of what it costs me.

In Jesus’s name I pray,

Amen

 
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Posted by on May 14, 2020 in John, Mothers of the Bible

 

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Mothers of the Bible — Mary, the Mother of Jesus (Part 15)

13 May

Then some of the scribes and Pharisees said to him, “Teacher, we want to see a sign from you.” He answered them, “An evil and adulterous generation demands a sign, but no sign will be given to it except the sign of the prophet Jonah. For as Jonah was in the belly of the huge fish three days and three nights, so the Son of Man will be in the heart of the earth three days and three nights. The men of Nineveh will stand up at the judgment with this generation and condemn it, because they repented at Jonah’s preaching; and look—something greater than Jonah is here. The queen of the south will rise up at the judgment with this generation and condemn it, because she came from the ends of the earth to hear the wisdom of Solomon; and look—something greater than Solomon is here. “When an unclean spirit comes out of a person, it roams through waterless places looking for rest but doesn’t find any. Then it says, ‘I’ll go back to my house that I came from.’ Returning, it finds the house vacant, swept, and put in order. Then it goes and brings with it seven other spirits more evil than itself, and they enter and settle down there. As a result, that person’s last condition is worse than the first. That’s how it will also be with this evil generation.” While he was still speaking with the crowds, his mother and brothers were standing outside wanting to speak to him. Someone told him, “Look, your mother and your brothers are standing outside, wanting to speak to you.” He replied to the one who was speaking to him, “Who is my mother and who are my brothers?” Stretching out his hand toward his disciples, he said, “Here are my mother and my brothers! For whoever does the will of my Father in heaven is my brother and sister and mother.”
Matthew 12:38-50

Dear God, I wish I had done Part 14 and Part 15 in reverse order. I missed this story in chapter 12 before I did the story of Jesus in the synagogue from chapter 13. In reading this now, the order of the stories is that Mary and Jesus’s brothers were dissed here by Jesus, then he tells a bunch of parables by the sea, and then he goes into the synagogue and is rejected (and indicates his family has rejected him as well).

What a strange time this must have been for Mary. She apparently had a lot of children, both boys and girls. I wonder how much time she spent trying to calm the other children down as they dealt with Jesus as their brother. It had to have been hard for them, and it added an underappreciated layer of complexity to Mary’s life as a mother. Maybe it would have been easier for her to figure out how to be a mother to Jesus as an adult if he had been her only, but she had some other children to worry about as well. She was a mother to all of them. And I’m sure sometimes she did it right by standing up to them and telling them they were wrong about Jesus, and sometimes she did it wrong and gave into their perspective of him.

Being a parent, even of adult children, is so complicated. It’s true that our job to parent them is never quite over. As long as we are alive, there is a role for us to play, even if it is only to show them love. Then there are the decisions we have to make regarding whether to help them or not help them in a given situation. I hate to see them suffer, but I also don’t want to get in the way of how you might be working in their life through an obstacle that is in front of them. If I remove that obstacle, have I gotten in your way?

Father, thank you that our forefathers and foremothers we just people too. Thank you that you have given us examples of flawed people who were as lost about parenting as I feel sometimes. I would learn nothing if they were perfect, but none of them are. Now, please help my wife and me to parent our own children. Counsel us through each other and others. Raise up people in our children’s lives whom they can hear and will speak with your voice. Heal their wounds. Heal our wounds. And, in the end, be glorified in all of our lives.

In Jesus’s name I pray,

Amen

 
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Posted by on May 13, 2020 in Matthew, Mothers of the Bible

 

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Mothers of the Bible — Mary, the Mother of Jesus (Part 14)

12 May

When Jesus had finished these parables, he left there. He went to his hometown and began to teach them in their synagogue, so that they were astonished and said, “Where did this man get this wisdom and these miraculous powers? Isn’t this the carpenter’s son? Isn’t his mother called Mary, and his brothers James, Joseph, Simon, and Judas? And his sisters, aren’t they all with us? So where does he get all these things?” And they were offended by him. Jesus said to them, “A prophet is not without honor except in his hometown and in his household.” And he did not do many miracles there because of their unbelief.
Matthew 13:53-58

This must have been such a confusing time for Jesus’s family and everyone who knew him growing up. It certainly seems that he was not only rejected at the synagogue, but also at home because he said, “A prophet is not without honor except in his hometown and in his household.” I wonder just how much grief he caught from everyone, including his family. And what were Mary’s thoughts regarding all of this? Had she lost sight of what she had heard from the angel 30 years before? Had the years worn her down a bit? Maybe she built up in her mind what her son’s life would be and she felt like it just wasn’t working out like it was supposed to. Maybe his siblings were complaining to her about him and she was giving into the pressure from them. Either way, it is apparent that Jesus was not feeling affirmed and supported.

This makes me think back to times when 1.) I didn’t have my wife around to help temper my reactions to my children’s behavior and 2.) one of the children would lobby me about how I should feel about the other and I would let their perspective unfairly influence my own. Number 1 is especially important because sometimes we definitely need that other parent to help guide us through frustrating times with our children when my emotions get the better of my judgment. I wonder how these stories might have been different if Joseph had still been around. I wonder how Joseph would have handled 30-year-old Jesus.

Father, thank you for giving me a co-parent. Thank you for giving me a wise woman to help me through those times when my emotions overrode my logic. I know there were times when I still failed my children, but the incidences are much fewer because I had a great co-parent. And I am sorry for when I failed to give my children what you needed them to have from me. I’m sorry for impatience and also for, at times, failing to give them what you needed them to have from me. I don’t have tons and tons of regrets, but I certainly have a few. Please guide all of us as we continue to mature in you.

In Jesus’s name I pray,

Amen

 
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Posted by on May 12, 2020 in Matthew, Mothers of the Bible

 

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Mothers of the Bible — Mary, the Mother of Jesus (Part 13)

11 May

On the third day a wedding took place in Cana of Galilee. Jesus’s mother was there, and Jesus and his disciples were invited to the wedding as well. When the wine ran out, Jesus’s mother told him, “They don’t have any wine.” “What has this concern of yours to do with me, woman?” Jesus asked. “My hour has not yet come.” “Do whatever he tells you,” his mother told the servants.
John 2:1-5

Dear God, it is really too bad that we don’t get tone of voice in this story. My wife and I were just talking about this vignette from Jesus’s life and she said that she thinks Jesus was wrong here (she said it, not me 🙂 ). She doesn’t like the tone he uses with Mary. For my part, I see a meddling mother who is trying to save the day for some friends and has a son she knows can do something about it.

However, when tone of voice comes into play, I think we can infer a more playful tone because of how John relates this story. Mary beseeches Jesus to solve their problem. He labels it as her concern and tells her that he can’t be doing anything this public just yet. Then she turns and tells the servants to do whatever Jesus tells them. What’s missing is Jesus’s acceptance of the task which tells me that his acceptance must have been in the tone of his voice. Our automatic image is of Jesus always stoic, but I have a feeling that he had contributed to the fact that the wine was running out through his own imbibing, and he was maybe even being playful with Mary. It’s certainly interesting that only John gives us this story. Mary apparently didn’t tell it to Luke when he was doing his research.

Okay, with all of that out of the way, what must it have been like to be a human woman and be the mother of the son of God–the Messiah? How did that work for her? Especially with Joseph apparently gone now. She was the only one left who had experienced the angel visits about Jesus. We’ll assume Zechariah and Elizabeth (John the Baptist’s parents) were gone by then because they were old at the time of Gabriel’s visit to Zechariah in the temple. No, she was it. And I’m sure there were confusing days. There was no one to consult with who could relate to her situation. She too was probably waiting for this young man to be the conquering Messiah. He was 30 now. Wasn’t it about time he got going? He could do these miracles, but wasn’t it time for more? Wasn’t it time for public leadership?

Father, it can be hard to get out of your way when it comes to the path you have for our children. It can feel like our prayers for them are going unanswered because, once again, we measure time in days weeks and months and you measure it in years, decades, and centuries. So I come to you today to simply worship you, pray for my wife and my children (and myself), that we would be on the path you have for us, and that you will use our lives for your glory. And I also, once again, commit to you that I will not look to my children to fulfill my own needs for pride or achievement, but I turn them loose to live their lives and pray that they would be dedicated to you for your glory’s sake and not mine.

In Jesus’s name I pray,

Amen

 
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Posted by on May 11, 2020 in John, Mothers of the Bible

 

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“A Lion’s Heart” by Fred Smith

07 May

 

Dear God, I read Fred Smith’s wonderful blog post this morning and I thought I’d spend some time with you about it. With all due respect to Fred and his copyright on this material, I’d like to copy and paste parts of his blog that struck me and then talk with you about them. 

It wasn’t a simple disagreement but a showdown that resulted in both men, once fast friends, turning away from each other for the balance of their lives.

The opening sentence had me. Assuming this would be a Bible story, I knew the reference immediately. How sad to have a relationship defined this way 2,000 years later. And I’m certain Paul must have regretted this break between them after Barnabas was dead. How horrible. I’m sure both of them would look back and think that they took this moment much too seriously. And maybe Paul was right and Mark needed tough love. And maybe Barnabas was right and he needed mercy and instruction. Maybe they were both right and maybe they were both wrong. But Satan loves to divide us from each other. Hopefully, you were able to take this break and spread your gospel wider because of it. 

Speaking of Satan dividing us, while I was making my breakfast this morning, I felt different feelings of residual anger towards different people in my life. After a couple of minutes it was almost as if the Holy Spirit would whisper to me that Satan was attacking me and trying to cause divisions, so I would give mercy and move on. Then it would happen again with someone else. I would just be standing alone in the kitchen and start to feel anger towards someone for things done to me years ago. Pitiful. But it’s a good plan of attack on Satan’s part. bitterness feeds those selfish parts of our hearts and tears us apart from each other and you. Thank you for helping me to be aware of what was happening to me. I am sorry to you that I still apparently carry so much bitterness around with me. 

As a young man John Mark was surrounded by the apostles and leaders of the movement coming to his home. His mother, Mary, was wealthy and influential. With access to relationships and rare advantages a young man could not have had more exposure to courage, miracles, heroic figures and the first days of the greatest events in the history of the world.

Still, Mark was weak and afraid. He ran naked from Gethsemane. He quit Paul and Barnabas when conditions were difficult. He disappointed the ones who took a risk on him.

Did Mark have too many advantages? Was he not tough enough because he had been raised in privilege? I was watching one of the episodes in the 10-part series about the Chicago Bulls called The Last Dance. There was a story about two Bulls players on the 1992 Olympic Dream Team who decided they had a score to settle with a player on the Croatia team because their general manager was negotiating to give him more money than one of their current key players. This player hadn’t done anything to them personally, but they decided to teach their GM a lesson by humiliating this kid. And in the first game they did, but one of the people they interviewed made a comment about the Croatian kid’s resilience. He said that the NBA players didn’t understand what a kid from Croatia had overcome in the 80s and early 90s. He was tougher than that and he came back in the second game, played well, and earned their respect. 

John Mark was going to have to suffer some setbacks if he was going to be ready to really serve with the new church. I’m sure this rift between Paul and Barnabas was used by you to help prepare him for future work.

It would be logical to predict he would fade away and self-destruct as a child of privilege who failed to launch.

But we would be wrong for after the decade had passed Paul says to Timothy, “Be sure to bring Mark with you because he will be so helpful to my ministry. Everyone else has deserted me.”

Mark spent over 10 years developing into someone who would be useful to those around him. He recorded Peter’s memories of Jesus and gave us a powerful gospel that we still read today. And he ministered to Paul at the end of his life. 

Ten years. It’s important for us to not be so impatient. It’s important for me to not be so impatient. I’ve said it many times before, but we tend to measure time in days, weeks, and months, and you measure it in years, decades and centuries. As a parent, as a son, as a husband, and a parishioner, and as a friend, it is important for me to give you (Father, Son, and Holy Spirit) the time you need to do your work in all of us, including me.

What happened? In those silent 10 years, Mark had attached himself to the sole person in his life – Simon Peter – who could relate completely to one who had deserted and failed his friends while betraying others. In Peter, he finds a father, a fellow sinner and a friend.

Peter doesn’t lead Mark and the rest of us through how powerful he is. Instead, he leads us and teaches us through his flaws and failures. In the same way, I can’t teach people through the stuff I do well. Oh sure, I can pass on some advice, but my real impact comes when I share my weaknesses and failings. In this case, I don’t think Mark would have benefitted as much from sitting at John’s feet for 10 years–or even Paul’s. No, I’m sure he learned resilience, repentance, and rebounding from regret through your grace from Peter.

What did Mark discover as he wrote the Gospel? He discovered himself and a Jesus that changed his life. Peter’s flaws were the same as his and Peter’s Christ became his. In “The Jesus I Never Knew,” Philip Yancey writes, “Jesus, I found, bore little resemblance to the Mr. Rogers figure I had met in Sunday School. He was the undomesticated Lion of Judah.”

I think Mark also learned some humility from Peter. I’ve always noticed that the stories we get where Peter is the most humiliated in front of Jesus are told to us in Mark. Peter doesn’t pull any punches when telling Mark his own story, and, in return, Mark communicates to us a unique version of Jesus. Lest I sound judgmental about the other gospels, I’ll say that we get the worst stories about John from his gospel as well. But in this case, it’s the example that Peter is setting for Mark that I think is important. 

Sent by Peter to Egypt as the first bishop of the Coptic church, Mark – the former coward, deserter and weakling – is horribly martyred by being dragged for two days behind a horse until his skin is torn off his body.

So that’s how it ends? A horrible death for someone who left us so much in Mark’s Gospel? A comfort to Paul in prison? Well, not exactly. There is also the legacy of transformation and courage. So much so that we get this:

Many years later it is said that the founders of the city of Venice in Italy, wanted a saint’s relics, so they stole his head and took it back to Venice. There it becomes the precious relic of one of the most famous cathedrals in the world – St. Mark’s. The deserter becomes the patron saint of Venice.

But here is what I love. Something he would have never believed and we could have not predicted when we first met him. The early church gave him the symbol of the winged lion, and it is the flag of Venice still today. It is a symbol of power, authority and strength. The Lion holds the scroll because he is the author of the earliest gospel and the inscription reads, “Peace to thee, Mark, my evangelist.” Peace and courage – not fear and running away. It is the same boy who fled and then became a lion – just like the Lion of Judah in his gospel.

Father, help me to see people for more than their failings. Help me to see them with your eyes. And help me to see myself for more than just my own failings. Help me to be patient and faithful as I strive to simply worship and serve you. 

In Jesus’s name I pray,

Amen

 
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Posted by on May 7, 2020 in Miscellaneous, Musings and Stories, Uncategorized

 

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Mothers of the Bible — Mary, the Mother of Jesus (Part 12)

06 May

After three days, they found him in the temple sitting among the teachers, listening to them and asking them questions. And all those who heard him were astounded at his understanding and his answers. When his parents saw him, they were astonished, and his mother said to him, “Son, why have you treated us like this? Your father and I have been anxiously searching for you.” “Why were you searching for me?” he asked them. “Didn’t you know that it was necessary for me to be in my Father’s house?” But they did not understand what he said to them. Then he went down with them and came to Nazareth and was obedient to them. His mother kept all these things in her heart. And Jesus increased in wisdom and stature, and in favor with God and with people.
Luke 2:46-52

Dear God, just this first sentence makes me think about those times when I was so mad at my child when they were little and, after I’d really built up my anger towards them and how I was going to really get onto them when I saw them, I would find them, hear their explanation, and realize that they hadn’t really done anything wrong at all, but, instead, had done their best to do the right thing. I can only imagine how Mary and Joseph were feeling as they searched Jerusalem for three days. I wonder where they went for those three days. What was the first place they looked? The second place? It took three days (coincidence?) to find him in the temple. I wonder why that wasn’t closer to the top of their list.

So they find him and they are probably ready to let him have it. How do I know? Because we think this account is being told to Luke by Mary and she remembers herself saying, “Son, why have you treated us like this?” Forget the idea of being grateful he was alive. She was just angry at him. She might have been telling herself (and Joseph) that if she found him alive she was going to kill him. How could he do this to her (them)?!?

To be clear, I don’t blame Mary for this and I don’t think Jesus did either. He explained himself fairly innocently, but he also learned–as most teenagers need to learn–that his actions impacted the lives of others as well. Jesus still needed some parenting here too. He was still piecing together who he was and how he should proceed.

Father, my children are grown now and finding their own way, but as long as I’m here I think you’ll have some role for me to play in their lives. It might be diminishing. It might be changing. It might be to simply offer at least one source of unconditional love in their lives–one safe place. If that’s what you have for me, so be it. And also help me to be the son you need me to be for my parents and my wife’s father. Help me to adequately express my love for them and know how to receive from them the things you need me to have.

In Jesus’s name I pray,

Amen

 
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Posted by on May 6, 2020 in Luke, Mothers of the Bible

 

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