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Forgotten

08 Feb

Dear God, I dreamt about my grandparents last night. I’m not sure where that dream came from, but it seemed fairly clear and significant. While it’s hard to say a lot of the details of the dream, it focused around their church, First United Methodist Church, back in Junction City, Kansas. I used to visit it with them whenever I would see them in the summer. They were pillars of that community at the time. They were loved and appreciated. They were part of the core of that church. Then my grandmother died fairly suddenly in 1992 and my grandfather move to Texas to be closer to my parents and had a long decline with Alzheimer’s, dying in 1999. It’s been over 30 years since they were part of that church family, and I would venture to say they have been forgotten. But how much of their legacy in that community remains?

Maybe I thought of this because my wife led singing for a double funeral this week for a couple who had been married over 68 years, and been part of our church for more than all of that time. They were respected, appreciated, and loved. They left a mark. There were 16 priests at the funeral because one of their son’s is a priest and while he was in seminary his mother would take treats and blessings to all of the young men in seminary. He was a fireman, among other things. And in your mercy, you enabled them to die within days of each other. The community really feels their loss. And yet, one day, 34 years from now, much like my grandparents, they will likely be forgotten. Time moves on. As Gary Thomas put it in Sacred Parenting, we are born we have children, and then we get out of history’s way. Yes, we contribute to history, but very few of us will ever have our names attached to something or be remembered. What I offer this world is my life, my actions, and how both of those things will touch other lives and fall like dominoes into the future. But in the long run, I will be forgotten.

Father, my grandparents’ names might be forgotten, but the vibrations of their lives carry on. They carry on in my father, in me, and in my children. They carry on in my aunts, uncles, and cousins. But more than that, they carry on in lives that experienced the vibrations of their actions who have no idea where those vibrations came from. And my life will be the same way one day. I will be forgotten. My name will disappear. And that’s okay. I don’t need people to remember my name so that I will be honored. Yes, there’s a sadness to know that my grandparents won’t be remembered because they mean a lot to me. But they’re fine now. They’re with you. And I’ll be with you someday. And even though I might be the lowest in your kingdom, I will still be able to worship you, love you, and live with the results of the life you gave me. Father, help me to be exactly who you need me to be today. The Gospel reading is about us being salt and light to the world. Make me salty today, but that saltiness can only come from you. That light can only be a reflection of you. Help me to be a conduit of you today through my worship of you.

I pray this in Jesus and with your Holy Spirit,

Amen

 
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Posted by on February 8, 2026 in Musings and Stories, Miscellaneous

 

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Examen

15 Nov

Dear God, my wife and I were talking over breakfast, and as we finished she mentioned she was going to her study to do her “Examen” for the week. I’ve never done this before so I asked her to tell me about it. She told me the questions she asks herself as she reflects on her week. It sounded like a good exercise, so I decided to pray through the questions this morning. I found the following questions on a United Methodist Church website. I don’t think they are exactly the questions my wife is asking herself, but they seem like a good place to start.

  1. Are you aware of God in this moment?
  2. What are you grateful for right now?
  3. When did you experience love today?
  4. Was there an opportunity in which you missed sharing love with others?
  5. What might you learn from that? (Tell God about it.)

Am I aware of you in this moment?

That’s a good question. Sometimes, yes. Sometimes, no. But it’s a reminder that I need to be. I need to be aware that the Holy Spirit is part of me, and he is praying with me right now. You are with me. You are real. You are interested in me. You have plans for me. You have desires for me and my life. You have things you both want me to have and don’t want me to have. You get frustrated with me when I am foolish, selfish, and sinful. You delight in the few times per day or week when I get it right. You delight in the fact that I’m trying. You get frustrated with my ingratitude. You want to give me rest, but you also want me to work harder.

And you are working in the lives of those I love most, the lives of those I care about around me, and even in my community and country. You are working in the world. You are working in the galaxy. You are working in the universe. Nothing is beyond you! You are so very big, and I am so very small. I love you.

What am I grateful for right now?

I’m sitting in a safe, comfortable house having just had a nice pancake/sausage breakfast. I so take these things for granted. I cannot seem to muster up gratitude for these things unless I explicitly sit down and think about it. I am grateful for the improvements at work. I am grateful for the amazing woman I’ve been with for over 36 years. I’m grateful for our health. I’m grateful for the children we have and the one we lost in pregnancy. My wife and I were talking about how she has experienced loss through death in a way that I haven’t. I’m grateful for the living. I’m grateful for your mercy. I’m grateful for answered prayers, both those you answer with a yes and those you answer with a no or not yet. I’m grateful for physical health and the ability to be active and exercise. I’ll cycle later this morning. I’m grateful I can do that. I’m grateful for the trip I’m about to take to Waco for a football game later today. What a little luxury in life that is afforded to me.

When did I experience love today?

Well, when I was sitting at the breakfast table and my wife walked in from having just walked the dog, she took a moment to pause and blow me a kiss from across the room while she put things away. Then she gave me a kiss when she was done. When she sat down to breakfast and I went to sit and join her while she ate, she laid down what she was looking at and welcomed my presence at the table. And we talked. She seemed to enjoy talking with me, and that made me feel loved. The day is young. I’m sure there will be more times today when I feel loved–especially by her. There are people who are precious to me who do not show me love. In fact, it’s quite the opposite. But I am grateful that this home is a place I like to be, and she makes it that way for me.

Was there an opportunity in which I missed sharing love with others?

The day is young, but I’ll say that there are two people I know who need expressions of love. One just lost a son and one is going through a significant health crisis. I meant to get by and buy a card for each of them this week, but I never did. I have to do this today! The cards must go in the mail today.

What might I learn from that?

Father, the truth is that I try to love others, but sometimes I allow things that are important to fall through the cracks. I miss opportunities to be your hands and feet in this world. I’m sorry for that. I like that you’re making me mindful of those two people specifically today, but there are others for whom I need to be praying. Relatives. People for whom relatives have asked me to pray. People I know who are suffering. Just everything, Father. There is an endless amount of need, and I can’t possibly cover it all or pray for it all, but if there is a line between what I can possibly do and what I can’t do, there is a lot of distance between me and it. So help me to get closer to that line. Help me to take all of the advantages you’ve given me and use them for your glory and to bless the people around me. Help me to see you in them and worship you as I love them.

I pray this in Jesus and with your Holy Spirit,

Amen

 
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Posted by on November 15, 2025 in Miscellaneous, Musings and Stories

 

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“Slippery Pearls” by Charlie Peacock

09 Nov

“Slippery Pearls” by Charlie Peacock (with a little Ashley Cleveland on BGV)

What you hold back from the minute
The minute will lack
If you don’t claim it from the hour
Then the hour takes it back
All our wants will pass quickly
What remains is our need
And mama don’t make no medicine
That’ll cure that disease

Nothing is certain here in this world
You drop all your treasures
Just like slippery pearls
Oh, it’s hard to find a handle
On the things that you see
‘Cause they slide right through your fingers
Just like slippery pearls

What you don’t lock up inside your heart
The world will consume
Might slip right down the throat of greed
Or through the floorboards in your room
There’s two thieves namеd pain and pleasure
Neithеr one is true
You ransom your flesh to save your bones
Then they come and take those too

Nothing is certain here in this world
You drop all your treasures
Just like slippery pearls
Oh, it’s hard to find a handle
On the things that you see
‘Cause they slide right through your fingers
Just like slippery pearls

They don’t make a map, no, to guide you
Through the badlands of the soul
You could lose yourself to blind conceit
Or to the hunger for control
Try to guard it all from the elements
And still gonna fall apart
‘Cause the world outside don’t pose no threat
Like the darkness in our hearts
Hey…

Nothing is certain here in this world
You drop all your treasures
Just like slippery pearls
Oh, it’s hard to find a handle
On the things that you see
‘Cause they slide right through your fingers
Just like slippery pearls

Dear God, I was trying to find a scripture to move me this morning, and nothing was really coming to mind. Frankly, I’ve been praying so much about some certain things in my life that I’m almost a little burned out on praying (is that okay to say?). My solution was to go to my Christian playlist on my phone, hit shuffle and see what came up first. This was it. I think this song is 30 years old. I remember when the album came out in 1995 and I lived in Dallas for a year. I’ve listened to every song on the Everything that’s on my Mind album by Charlie Peacock several times, including this one, but I don’t think I ever paid attention to the lyrics on this one before. I spent a little time with them, and I found conviction.

Waste. That’s what I got. I am guilty of wasting a lot of minutes. And those minutes turn into hours. and by the end of the month, the hours probably turn into days. I probably wasted days every month and as much as a month a year. So that’s the first verse. And I never appreciated the poetry of that verse. It’s really great:

What you hold back from the minute
The minute will lack
If you don’t claim it from the hour
Then the hour takes it back
All our wants will pass quickly
What remains is our need

Then the second verse talks about not treasuring what’s important.

What you don’t lock up inside your heart
The world will consume
Might slip right down the throat of greed
Or through the floorboards in your room
There’s two thieves namеd pain and pleasure
Neithеr one is true
You ransom your flesh to save your bones
Then they come and take those too

I don’t feel as guilty on this one. I think my head is in pretty much the right place when it comes to what I treasure, what I guard, and what I disregard. But again, the poetry of this song is really strong. I like it.

They don’t make a map, no, to guide you
Through the badlands of the soul
You could lose yourself to blind conceit
Or to the hunger for control
Try to guard it all from the elements
And still gonna fall apart
‘Cause the world outside don’t pose no threat
Like the darkness in our hearts

Was it the apple that tempted Adam and Eve, or the darkness in their heart that they didn’t completely trust you? They had some amount of hunger for control. We all do. It’s hard to be helpless. I have a need for certainty, and the faith you want me to put in you can seem contrary to that need because sometimes your plan is neither obvious to me or has things play out the way I selfishly want them to.

Nothing is certain here in this world
You drop all your treasures
Just like slippery pearls
Oh, it’s hard to find a handle
On the things that you see
‘Cause they slide right through your fingers
Just like slippery pearls

I didn’t plan this, but the first line of the chorus echoes that last paragraph: “Nothing is certain here in this world.” I look for a handle so I can control (see verse 3: “Or to the hunger for control“) what is going on around me. But sometimes, even like now, I’m reduced to asking you to simply show me the next step I am to take. I don’t know where the narrow path leads, and it may very well lead down to a dark valley. Mine is not to know the destination. Mine is to know the path you have for me to take regardless of what it costs me.

Father, I’m involved in a challenging situation right now, but my prayers yesterday were for everyone’s best. I want the best for every person involved. I don’t want to take the easiest path for me. I want to be your blessing to others. I want to be your presence. I want to take every action that you want me to take. And I want to not act when you are calling me to simply be still. I want to be exactly who you need me to be today. Help me to be that.

I pray this in Jesus and with your Holy Spirit,

Amen

 
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Posted by on November 9, 2025 in Hymns and Songs

 

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Wisdom 3:1-9

02 Nov

1     But the souls of the righteous are in the hand of God,
    and no torment can overtake them.
2 From the viewpoint of the foolish, they seemed to be dead,
    and their passing away was reckoned as a misfortune,
3     and their departure from us as their ruin.
But they are at peace.
4 Although in the eyes of others they were chastised,
    their hope is full of immortality.
5 Having endured a slight chastisement, they will receive great blessings,
    because God tested them
    and found them worthy to be with him.
6 He put them to the proof like gold in a furnace,
    and he accepted them as a sacrificial burnt offering.
7 In the time of their visitation they will shine brightly
    and spread like sparks among the stubble.
8 They will judge nations and have dominion over peoples,
    and the Lord will be their King forever.
9 Those who trust in him will understand truth,
    and the faithful will dwell with him in love,
because grace and mercy are reserved for his holy ones,
    and he shows concern for his elect.

Wisdom 3:1-9

Dear God, on this All Souls Day, I am left thinking that I don’t think about my dead ancestors enough. I think about some of them. The ones I knew. The ones I liked. But I don’t think about the ones I didn’t know, or the ones I might have known but with whom I had not relationship.

I just got some mementos from my mother’s house that are from my paternal grandmother. I knew her and liked her. I knew my paternal grandfather too. And I think about them. But I never their parents. And although I met my maternal grandmother, I only ever saw her a handful of times and I didn’t really know her. And I never met my maternal grandfather. He was long gone by the time I was born. Interestingly, however, almost everyone from my parents’ generation of the family are still living. I’ve only lost one uncle who I saw less than my maternal grandmother. That is to say, I didn’t really know him at all. But I haven’t experienced as much loss. Certainly, I haven’t experienced the type of loss my wife has, who has lost both parents, and has only one blood immediate family member at her parents’ generation level. This day means more to her than it does to me, mainly because I just don’t relate to it in the same way.

Father, I want to be more sensitive to my wife’s loss and pain even though I can’t empathize. I do, however, at least want to effectively sympathize. I also want to think more about the legacies, both good and bad, my ancestors left me that are rippling through history. And how my legacy will ripple through history in my descendants. I pray that you will make your plan me-proof. I don’t want to be able to get in the way of whatever you are doing in the world, but I want the dominoes my life knocks over to be part of bringing your kingdom and will into the earth. As I sit here right now, I am filled with love for all of the ancestors I did and didn’t know. They are part of me and I carry them with me. May it all happen for your glory.

I pray this in Jesus and with your Holy Spirit,

Amen

 
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Posted by on November 2, 2025 in Wisdom

 

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“Cry the Name” by Jill Phillips (originally by Rich Mullins)

26 Oct

“Cry the Name” by Jill Phillips (originally by Rich Mullins)

I cannot hide this longing that grows
In this temple of silence and stars
But a thief in the night stole in and broke
Every chain that had bound up my heart
I cannot cling to shadows again
So here on this altar tonight
I lay every dream I’ve ever dreamt
To burn in the fire He lights

I cry the Name of the One who loves me
The Name of the One on whom I call
‘Til it roars like thunder
Rolling down these canyon walls

I cry the Name of the One who loves me
The Name of the One on whom I call
‘Til it roars like thunder
Rolling down these canyon walls

Every breath I’ve ever breathed
Was sent as a gift from on high
And with all that is left of all that is me
Up to the Heavens I cry

The Name of the One who loves me
The Name of the One on whom I call
‘Til it roars like thunder
Rolling down these canyon walls

I cry the Name of the One who loves me
The Name of the One on whom I call
‘Til it roars like thunder
Rolling down these canyon walls

The Name of the One who loves me
Name of the One on whom I call
‘Til it roars like thunder
Rolling down these canyon walls

I cry the Name of the One who loves me
The Name of the One on whom I call
Down these canyon walls

I cry out Your name
I cry Your name out
‘Til it roars like thunder
Rolling down these canyon walls

The Name of the One on whom I call
‘Til it roars like thunder
Rolling down these canyon walls
Down these canyon walls

Source: LyricFind

Songwriters: David “Beaker” Strasser / Richard Mullins

Dear God, I think Rich Mullins would have liked this cover of his song. Like most people, I usually like the original more than any remakes, but this one really brings the poetry of the words alive for me.

I cannot hide this longing that grows
In this temple of silence and stars
But a thief in the night stole in and broke
Every chain that had bound up my heart

Paul talked about Jesus coming like a “thief in the night,” (1 Thessalonians 5:2) so Rich and Beaker lean into that imagery here. Our minds think of a thief in the night as a bad thing, but, well, if you know you know, right? If you know this verse then you know the depths of what Rich and Beaker are saying. So with this verse, I just get this image of someone at the end of themselves and they’ve finally submitted to you. They let you come in the window and trusted you to rob them of everything you want to take. The beauty of it is, you want to take their shame, their guilt, their vice, their selfishness… You want to take all of that and leave them with the smooth skin of a new baby. The innocence of a spotless lamb. That’s what you stole. So now that the thief (you) have made off with all of the bad:

I cannot cling to shadows again
So here on this altar tonight
I lay every dream I’ve ever dreamt
To burn in the fire He lights

At least at first, it’s hard to cling to the shadows again. Shadows come from the light, when things are there to block it. And we want those things in our hearts that will block your light. But you want to remove them so the light shines everywhere. And, at least at first, we want your light everywhere. We want the shadows gone. I just finished looking at Jonah and Nineveh. At first, the Ninevites and the King of the Assyrians wanted you and repented. They wanted to get rid of their shadows. The sad thing is, the thrill wears off and the comfort of our shadows and shame can slowly come back if we don’t walk through the narrow gate and persevere down the narrow path (Matthew 7:13-14). But let’s sit a little longer on this night that Rich and Beaker are describing. They have chosen to lay every dream they’ve ever dreamt and let them burn in the fire you light. Beautiful.

I cry the Name of the One who loves me
The Name of the One on whom I call
‘Til it roars like thunder
Rolling down these canyon walls

I know there are a lot of places with skies, stars, and canyons, but this makes me think of some moments I’ve had out at the H. E. Butt Family Foundation Ranch near Leakey, Texas. Mountaintop experiences, to be sure. Glorious. Emotional. Humbling, but in a good way. It can be hard to leave that place. So I’ll just let the poetry of these words take me back to those times. When the soil of my heart was freshly weeded. Before some thorns and weeds had crept in. Just you, me, and guiltless soil.

Father, to quote another Rich Mullins song, “Elijah,” “Sometimes my ground was stony, sometimes covered up with thorns, and only you could make it what it had to be.” Help me to weed my soil again today. Help me to go and be your ambassador in every situation I find myself in. I love you, Father. Make me what I need to be today so that you might be glorified. I want to decrease and you increase. As I teach Sunday school in an hour, I want you to move hearts. Let this be a day when we do some weeding in all of our hearts.

I pray this in Jesus and with your Holy Spirit,

Amen

 
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Posted by on October 26, 2025 in Hymns and Songs

 

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Motivation

10 Oct

Dear God, I’m helping teach a class for Christian Men’s Life Skills (CMLS) next week on Motivation. These men have done something to get sideways with the law and now have community service hours to fulfill. They chose to fill some of them by taking this class. And it’s a commitment: 3 hours a night, 3 nights a week, for 10 weeks. 90 hours. Some of them are driving a long way to take it.

Maybe that’s where I start. Maybe that’s how I enter into this with them. I’m teaching with another man who’s taught this class nearly 50 times so he has refined his material over and over again. He knows it very well. And it’s tried and true. But for my part, while I’m using his materials as the skeleton of what I’m going to say, I need to find my own flesh to put on the bones. I need to hear from you, Holy Spirit, what you want them to hear. What you need them to hear. What seeds you have for me to plant.

So I guess the first message for them is that they have already exhibited great motivation by choosing this intense commitment. I just got this idea while I was typing the first paragraph. Was it from you? I hope so.

  • What motivated them to be here tonight?
    • How people get accurate surveys. If you want good results you figure out a way to get answers from as many people across a spectrum as possible. Social class. Race. Geography. Gender. Age. Sexual orientation. For example, if I only survey people by calling landlines, how might I skew my results? For the most part, the people who still have landlines are older so I won’t hear from younger people, poor people, and likely people of color. For the most part, my survey will skew old, white, and middle class or higher.
    • Lies, darn lies, and statistics. When they were explaining to me that CMLS has a very low recidivism rate (I think they said 13%), I thought, “Wow, they must do some great teaching.” But after I got involved I realized the results are skewed like a bad survey. But this is an impressive skewing. One of the things that drives their results is the commitment the men are making to be there. Three nights a week for 10 weeks. If you’re going to commit to that much time over that short of a period you are already saying something about yourself. You want to change. You want to get better. They all have a choice to be here or not be here tonight. They chose to be here.
    • So back to motivation, what motivated them to be here? What’s driving their participation? They set out every Monday, Tuesday, and Thursday from September 15-November 20 to attend the class. They deny themselves. Maybe it’s to stay out of jail, but there are other ways to do their community service. But even the motivation to stay out of jail is a choice. Some people who aren’t motivated will just accept jail rather than climb the hill the judge has put in front of them. So why are they here? The answers will be different for everyone:
      • Be a better man for their wife and/or children.
      • Be a better man for their parents.
      • Tired of running and kicking against the goads (Acts 26:13-14)
        • Their lifestyle is not getting them what they want so they are ready to explore a new path, and we, as instructors, are here to give them that path and introduce them to who God really is and how he is there for them as much as he is for us.
      • So why does CMLS have such a high success rate? I’d like to think it’s because of the amazing teachers, but ultimately it’s because they skew the results because we don’t have a random sampling of people who get assigned community service hours by the courts. We have a skewed sample of men who are motivated to do something about their lives.

This is where I will pick up and get into Maslow’s Hierarchy of Needs and go with the slides from there.

Father, this really helped me, and I love the Acts 26:13-14 reference. Paul explaining his conversion experience said this to King Agrippa:

13 “About noon, King Agrippa, as I was on the road, I saw a light from heaven, brighter than the sun, blazing around me and my companions. 14 We all fell to the ground, and I heard a voice saying to me in Aramaic, ‘Saul, Saul, why do you persecute me? It is hard for you to kick against the goads.’

15 “Then I asked, ‘Who are you, Lord?’

“ ‘I am Jesus, whom you are persecuting,’ the Lord replied.”

You were telling Paul, “I’m trying to tell you and teach you about me, and all you keep doing is persecuting the messengers. I’m trying to steer you in the right direction with a goad and you are fighting it? Aren’t you tired of fighting me? I have something for you that’s so much better than what you’re living now.”

Father, as I get into later slides, I think I’m going to try to address my motivation for being there. My co-teacher’s/mentor’s motivation for being there. I’m there because you’ve taught me my ultimate purpose in life, ultimate fulfillment, comes from simply following the two great commandments. And you didn’t do these two great commandments for you. You didn’t tell me to love you with all my heart, soul, mind, and strength for your ego. Because you needed that from me. No, you did it because you know I need you and the closer I get to you the happier I am. And then you said the second greatest is like the first one, but then you turned it out to other people. Love my neighbor as myself. My life is best when I’m giving it away. When I’m loving. When I’m caring. When I’m sacrificing. So on Maslow’s scale of five: 1.) Basic Needs, 2.) Security, 3.) Social Needs, 4.) Self-Worth Needs, and 5.) Self-Actualization, all of the other teachers and I, including the alumni that show up to support are addressing levels 4 and 5. I am finding my joy and peace through serving these men and being your messenger to them. Oh, how I praise you for this. Thank you, Father. Thank you for loving me, calling me, teaching me (continually), and sending me.

I pray this in Jesus and with your Holy Spirit,

Amen

 
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Posted by on October 10, 2025 in Miscellaneous, Musings and Stories

 

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“Proud Corazon” by Anthony Gonzalez

30 Sep

Say that I’m crazy or call me a fool
But last night, it seemed that I dreamed about you

When I opened my mouth, what came out was a song
And you knew every word and we all sang along

To a melody played on the strings of our souls
And a rhythm that rattled us down to the bone

Our love for each other will live on forever
In every beat of my proud corazón

Our love for each other will live on forever
In every beat of my proud corazón

¡Ay mi familia! ¡Oiga mi gente!
Canten a coro, let it be known
Our love for each other will live on forever
In every beat of my proud corazón

¡Ay mi familia! ¡Oiga mi gente!
Canten a coro, let it be known
Our love for each other will live on forever
In every beat of my proud corazón

Written by Adrian Molina (lyrics) and Germaine Franco (composer)

Dear God, I was playing this song for some extended family last night and I had it going in my head when I woke up this morning. I thought I would sit in my sadness with it a while and bring that sadness to you. You said that those who mourn would be comforted. Please comfort me now.

I have a couple of family relationships that are completely broken and it hurts. It is a hole in my heart. Sometimes, like even right now, it brings tears to my eyes. But I’ve accepted that maybe, at least for now, this is the path you have for all of us so that you can get us to the place you want us to be. I don’t want to get in the way of your plan for them or for me just because I selfishly want them back in my life. No one ever said (besides prosperity gospel preachers) that my life wouldn’t have pain. In fact, Jesus started off the beatitudes with being poor in spirit and mourning. He knew we would experience that.

And now that I’m sitting here in this sadness, I am thinking about the sadness in Ukraine over people being randomly killed by rockets being indiscriminately fired at them. Their family. I think about those is Palestine and Israel who have experienced incredible pain and loss. I think about the families here being separated by immigration rules that need reformed. I think about the pain of people who have family members with addiction issues. Parents who are fighting and don’t love each other. Parents who are drug-addicted and CPS is having to intervene. Yes, there is a lot of mourning out there. Yes, there is a lot of pain. Yes, there is a lot of those who are poor in spirit.

So I go to this song. It’s from the movie Coco. And I’ll say up front that the theology presented in Coco is not good, but I don’t really care about that in this moment. The movie is beautiful. As this song wraps up the movie, and as I listened to it last night, the part about dreaming really hit me. There are two people about whom you give me dreams. I’ll say the dreams are from you anyway. Even though our relationship is completely fractured, every time I dream of them they are good dreams. They are dreams filled with love and mercy. Forgiveness. Repentance. Hugs. Tears. I usually wake up from those dreams with tears in my eyes. I’m grateful for those dreams. Thank you for them.

Father, I pray for restoration of the relationships that are possible on this side of life. It’s too short to reject family love. But regardless, for the people who have loss through death and the people who will not see the restoration of relationship on this side of life, I pray for an eternity that, within your will, will be spent together worshipping and serving you.

I pray this in Jesus and with your Holy Spirit,

Amen

 
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Posted by on September 30, 2025 in Hymns and Songs

 

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Unforgiven (Movie with Clint Eastwood)

29 Aug

Dear God, I came across a short audio clip yesterday of Conan O’Brien talking about this movie, and he had a great take I’d never considered. One of the deeper, subtler parts of this movie is that just about every character, with the exception of one cowboy and English Bob, wakes up in the morning thinking they are doing the right thing. They even see beating or killing the people they attack as justified and even noble to some extent. He said, “In Unforgiven, if Clint Eastwood and everyone else, if Gene Hackman and Morgan Freeman, if everyone got in a room for a minute and talked they go, ‘Oh, wait a minute. So that was meant…Right. Okay. Let’s go. Let’s get out of here.'” Truer words.

Much like the cast of this movie, almost all of us (not all, but almost all) wake up in the morning feeling justified in our own actions. Maybe even self-righteous about it. And we all have blind spots to our own character and actions. How we hurt people. How we misinterpret the way we see others hurt people. We assume the worst and we expect no less than the best. Now, it’s getting even worse because we assume beliefs of people without knowing them. Politics is the easiest example. If I don’t like or don’t like the president, whether Republican or Democrat, it’s assumed that I like or don’t like everything about that person and their policies/actions. And we are even starting to put those limitations on ourselves. I remember talking to someone before the 2024 election about the choices for president, and I told them, “I’ll tell you three things I disagree with [my preferred candidate] on if you tell me three things you disagree with [their preferred candidate] on.” They couldn’t do it. They couldn’t allow themselves to enter a mindset that would disagree with their candidate on anything. And this is a person who wakes up in the morning thinking they are doing the right thing and fighting for the right thing. And I am the same. I wake up and think I’m doing and fighting for the right thing too.

Father, I have a challenging situation at work that I need your help with. I need you, Holy Spirit, to guide me. I need to confront a situation that is hard. What makes it hard is that I desperately want it to be a constructive solution that leaves everyone in a better place than we are in now. I’m being intentionally cryptic because this prayer gets published in a public space, but you know everything that’s going on in my heart. I’m here to submit myself to you and ask you to guide me. Help me to assume the best in everyone and let my interactions with them be a reflection of you and how you want to build us up and transform us more and more into who Jesus was and called us to be. Raise up people in my life who can help me on that path as well. Hold me to a higher standard. Push me in areas where I have blind spots. Call me to repent. I submit myself to your correction. Grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, the courage to change the things I can, and the wisdom to know the difference.

I pray this in Jesus and with your Holy Spirit,

Amen

 
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Posted by on August 29, 2025 in Miscellaneous, Musings and Stories

 

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Job 19:1-6

29 Apr

19 Then Job spoke again:

2 “How long will you torture me?
    How long will you try to crush me with your words?
3 You have already insulted me ten times.
    You should be ashamed of treating me so badly.
4 Even if I have sinned,
    that is my concern, not yours.
5 You think you’re better than I am,
    using my humiliation as evidence of my sin.
6 But it is God who has wronged me,
    capturing me in his net.

Job 19:1-6

Dear God, it can be hard to be a friend and know when to speak and when to remain silent. When to give a solution, when to give an admonition, or when to say, “That sucks,” and just give the other person a hug.

In this situation, Job was wrong, but he was also right. He was wrong that you had wronged him. But he was right in that he hadn’t done anything to incur your wrath so his friends were wrong to keep accusing him of such. Everyone was looking for someone else to blame when there was simply no one to blame. Job’s friends blamed him. He blamed you. None of them were right.

If I had been Job’s friend, what should I have done to help him? If I have a friend now, what is my role in their life. Where do I draw the line between helping them find a solution, perhaps pointing out an area where they are possibly at fault, and then just holding them and telling them, “That sucks”?

I heard a story recently about a father whose daughter intentionally threw a youth league game in a tournament so they wouldn’t have to go into overtime because she was too nervous about overtime. The father then sent out an email to the coach and possibly others saying his daughter was so anxious over two girls on the team who are not as good as she thinks they should be that she intentionally threw the game. In my mind, the father was so horrified he looked for someone else to blame so he put his daughter’s anxiety on these two young girls who are likely not part of the problem at all. But his blinders caused him to lose perspective.

Father, I’ve been too close to things and lost perspective before. I am sure there are things going on in my life that I can’t see as well. I am a fool, and I need to be careful in my own life to prayerfully consider situations before I speak. Before I act. To take a beat. Whenever I speak or act impulsively, I am almost always wrong. And I almost always cause more damage than I resolve. So continue to teach me. Forgive me for my foolishness. And I do want to say thank you for everything. For the food I am about to eat today. For the home I live in. For my health. For my wife’s health. For my wife and who she is. For our friends. Thank you.

I pray this in Jesus and with your Holy Spirit,

Amen

 
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Posted by on April 29, 2025 in Job

 

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Isaiah 49:14-15

02 Apr

14 Yet Jerusalem says, “The Lord has deserted us;
    the Lord has forgotten us.”

15 “Never! Can a mother forget her nursing child?
    Can she feel no love for the child she has borne?
But even if that were possible,
    I would not forget you!

Isaiah 49:14-15

Dear God, verse 15 is so powerful and wonderful. So reassuring. You built in a love of child into parents–especially mothers–that is amazing. And you knew how to put it there because that love for us is in you.

What’s interesting is that it is easier and easier for a child to forget its parent, just as it is easier and easier for us to forget you. There is an epidemic in our country today of adult children walking away from their families of origin. There can be any number of reasons for this. There can be unhealed pain. There can be just plain ol’ selfishness and even cruelty. Vengeance for something either done or perceived to have been done. And it can be hard, as the adult child, to see the parent with your eyes. To give them grace.

And we do this to you. We walk away, either from unhealed pain or selfishness. We might even want to be intentionally cruel to you or exact our vengeance upon you for something we perceived you did that we felt betrayed us.

But your love for us does not work that way. You never forget. You never leave. You are the father on the porch, waiting for us to come down the road. You give us the freedom to walk away, but you also never take away our freedom to turn around and come home.

Father, I have pain as a parent. I am sorry I have inflicted that kind of pain on you in the past. I am sorry my figurative brothers and sisters in the world continue to inflict that kind of pain on you. I hope that my love and the love from my other figurative brothers and sisters who are worshipping you today brings you joy in your existence. I willingly and gladly receive your love. I give you my heart and my soul.

I pray all of this in Jesus and with your Holy Spirit,

Amen

 
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Posted by on April 2, 2025 in Isaiah, Restore: A Guided Lent Journal for Prayer and Meditation

 

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