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Tag Archives: Mourning

John 5:1-6

01 Apr

5 Afterward Jesus returned to Jerusalem for one of the Jewish holy days. 2 Inside the city, near the Sheep Gate, was the pool of Bethesda, with five covered porches. 3 Crowds of sick people—blind, lame, or paralyzed—lay on the porches. 5 One of the men lying there had been sick for thirty-eight years. 6 When Jesus saw him and knew he had been ill for a long time, he asked him, “Would you like to get well?”

John 5:1-6

Dear God, off of the top of my head, I can’t think of many or any examples of Jesus proactively approaching the sick person and offering healing. Maybe there are, but when I read this passage this morning, that is what struck me. Maybe this is semantics, but Jesus didn’t say, “May I heal you?” He asked, “Would you like to get well?” Again, maybe I’m reading too much into this and there are cultural norms and customs at play, but the intimation of this verbiage in 21st Century English is that there is a chance the man wanted to stay sick by the pool. It had been his life for 38 years. It would be a lot to take it away. Even though it was awful, it was all he knew.

I have so many analogies running through my head right now for how this can be true of us now. Do I want to give up my sins and follow after you? Well, I’ve gotten kind of used to my sin and this life. The devil I know is better than the life in you that I don’t know. Or when I think of how we are all afraid of death, but I wonder if you don’t see this life for us as the equivalent of us lying by this pool. That’s not to say you don’t have us here and have a role for us here. Our human lives are precious and important. But you have the perspective of what we don’t on the life that is to come. “Don’t be afraid.”

I suppose I should read Sister Miriam’s commentary on this passage from Restored: A Guided Lent Journal for Prayer and Meditation. She focused on being present with you and letting you heal us, and then for us to be present with others, allowing you to flow through us to them.

Father, I have sorrows. I have areas of my heart and soul that need healed. Some are of my own making. Some are things done to me. Some, I can’t tell whose fault it is, mine or someone else’s. But I want to sit with you in this moment and tell you that, yes, I want to be healed. I don’t know what that healing even looks like because I do think sorrow is important sometimes. I think lament is appropriate. I think mourning is appropriate. Jesus even said it is blessed to mourn and to be comforted. So help me to use my sorrow and turn it into comfort for others. I have a friend who’s coming up on the one-year anniversary of his wife passing. Help me to comfort him. Love him through me. Love the people I touch today through me. And use the comforting process to heal my own heart as well.

I pray this in Jesus and with your Holy Spirit,

Amen

 
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Posted by on April 1, 2025 in John, Restore: A Guided Lent Journal for Prayer and Meditation

 

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Ruth 1:19-22

28 Nov

19 So the two of them continued on their journey. When they came to Bethlehem, the entire town was excited by their arrival. “Is it really Naomi?” the women asked.

20 “Don’t call me Naomi,” she responded. “Instead, call me Mara, for the Almighty has made life very bitter for me. 21 I went away full, but the Lord has brought me home empty. Why call me Naomi when the Lord has caused me to suffer and the Almighty has sent such tragedy upon me?”

22 So Naomi returned from Moab, accompanied by her daughter-in-law Ruth, the young Moabite woman. They arrived in Bethlehem in late spring, at the beginning of the barley harvest.

Dear God, how easy it is for all of us to be like Naomi in verse 20 and see our lives as Mara (bitter)? We can be so selfish that we see only what we want that we do not have. We cannot see what you’ve done for us. So, in this case, Naomi sees only that she wants her husband and sons back. She wants her security back. She wants the life she had before their refugee trip to Moab back. She would do anything in that moment to have it all back. That’s what she wants more than anything.

I’ve been there. I’m still often there. I can only see what I want that I don’t have. I had a good cry yesterday over things I lament. And I think that’s okay. I think it’s okay that Naomi was mourning here. It’s fair. She lost her husband and sons. She was scared. lament and mourning are legitimate things to do. It was one of the first things Jesus said in the Sermon on the Mount: “Blessed are those who mourn for they will be comforted.” (Matthew 5:4) So I’m not saying I shouldn’t be sad about the things that make me sad. But I am saying that I need to open my eyes to the amazing things you are doing for me–both that I can see and that I cannot see.

In Naomi’s case, you gave her Ruth. You brought her back at the time of the beginning of the barley harvest which would ultimately give Ruth the visibility to Boaz that you needed her to have. You were providing for her and setting up the lineage to Jesus at the time time:

Ruth & Boaz –> Obed –> Jesse –> David –> Jesus

And what have you given me? Well, even while I was typing this, I received a loving text from one of my closest friends, telling me how much our friendship means to him. I have tears in my eyes just typing this now. What a gift! Thank you. Of course, there is my wife, health, job, home, and all of the things I try to remember to thank you for regularly. Then there are the things you’re doing that I simply cannot see. But you’re there. You’re doing your thing. You’re loving a world that fails to love you. You are…beyond words.

Father, I thank you. Thank you for what you are doing. Thank you for what you are not doing that I want you to do but you know better. Thank you for your comfort. Thank you that it is okay to lament and mourn while I keep my eyes on you. Thank you, Father. Thank you for everything.

I pray this in Jesus and with your Holy Spirit,

Amen

 
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Posted by on November 28, 2024 in Ruth

 

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Romans 6:3-11

02 Nov

3 Or have you forgotten that when we were joined with Christ Jesus in baptism, we joined him in his death? 4 For we died and were buried with Christ by baptism. And just as Christ was raised from the dead by the glorious power of the Father, now we also may live new lives.

5 Since we have been united with him in his death, we will also be raised to life as he was. 6 We know that our old sinful selves were crucified with Christ so that sin might lose its power in our lives. We are no longer slaves to sin. 7 For when we died with Christ we were set free from the power of sin. 8 And since we died with Christ, we know we will also live with him. 9 We are sure of this because Christ was raised from the dead, and he will never die again. Death no longer has any power over him. 10 When he died, he died once to break the power of sin. But now that he lives, he lives for the glory of God. 11 So you also should consider yourselves to be dead to the power of sin and alive to God through Christ Jesus.

Romans 6:3-11

Dear God, I’m praying this prayer on All Souls Day, November 2. I believe the Catholic Church created this as a day after All Saints Day to pray for the souls still in purgatory. Since I’m not so much a believer in purgatory, I want to use this time to pray for some specific friends who are mourning this year. I have one friend who lost a mother fairly suddenly on Thursday (two days ago). Then I have a friend who died very suddenly yesterday while grocery shopping. He leaves behind family and friends who are grieving. I have a friend who lost his wife this spring after a battle with cancer. And there are others. There are many others. But that is who is on my heart this morning. The souls who are with you now and the holes in hearts their deaths leave behind.

I pray for my friends right now who are mourning. “Blessed are those who mourn, for they will be comforted.” (Matthew 5:4) Please raise up people to comfort them. Show me my role in comforting them. Help them to know how to reach out to you during this difficult time. Comfort me in this loss as well. I really loved the man who died yesterday. He was much older than I am, but we were in Rotary together and had lunch one-on-one at least five times. Each one was always so long because we just truly enjoyed each other. I will surely miss him. I do, even now.

Father, I have a day to live today. I have family to love. I’ll be spending a lot of time with one family member in particular. Help me to love them. Help me to be what you need them to have. But let it start with my worship of you. Help me to remember that you are my God. Help me to recognize idols in my life and sink into your presence. Help me to be the man you are ultimately forming me to be.

I pray this in Jesus and with your Holy Spirit,

Amen

 
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Posted by on November 2, 2024 in Romans

 

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“The Valley Song (Sing of Your Mercy)” by Jars of Clay

16 Jun

“The Valley Song (Sing of Your Mercy)” by Jars of Clay

You have led me to the sadness
I have carried this pain
On a back bruised, nearly broken
I’m crying out to You

I will sing of Your mercy
That leads me through valleys of sorrow
To rivers of joy

When death, like a gypsy
Comes to steal what I love
I will still look to the heavens
I will still seek your face

But I fear You aren’t listening
Because there are no words
Just the stillness
And the hunger
For a faith that assures

I will sing of Your mercy
That leads me through valleys of sorrow
To rivers of joy

alleluia, alleluia
Alleluia, alleluia

While we wait for rescue
With our eyes tightly shut
Face to the ground using our hands
To cover the fatal cut

Though the pain is an ocean
Tossing us around, around, around
You have calmed greater waters
Higher mountains have come down

I will sing of Your mercy
That leads me through valleys of sorrow
To rivers of joy
I will sing of Your mercy
That leads me through valleys of sorrow
To rivers of joy

Alleluia, alleluia
Alleluia, alleluia

Songwriters: Aaron Sands / Charlie Lowell / Dan Haseltine / Matt Odmark / Stephen Daniel Mason

Dear God, this Father’s Day is less painful for me than past Father’s Days have been, but I still found myself being very aware this morning that Father’s Day and Mother’s Day can be very painful for some. I know several people who are experiencing their first Father’s Day without a child that they lost–some within just the last couple of weeks. I know some who have children leading lives that grieve their parents. Frankly, there are countless reasons Father’s Day can be painful for people, including having lost their own father.

With all of that in mind, I came across this song this morning. I’ve had it on my playlist for a long time, but I really stopped to listen to it while I was driving on a road trip earlier this week. I think it works because it doesn’t gloss over pain or tell me that my job is to push through to the other side. It simply says that sing of your mercy through my pain.

You have led me to the sadness
I have carried this pain
On a back bruised, nearly broken
I’m crying out to You

I will sing of Your mercy
That leads me through valleys of sorrow
To rivers of joy

As I pray all of this to you, I am thinking about three friends, in particular, who are experiencing the grief of having lost a child in the last year. One of the things I learned when watching my wife go through the loss of her mother is to encourage people to allow themselves to be sad. Don’t try to be the person who is handing it “well.” Just let it be sad. For these friends, I sing these words this morning.

When death, like a gypsy
Comes to steal what I love
I will still look to the heavens
I will still seek your face

But I fear You aren’t listening
Because there are no words
Just the stillness
And the hunger
For a faith that assures

I will sing of Your mercy
That leads me through valleys of sorrow
To rivers of joy

alleluia, alleluia
Alleluia, alleluia

“But I fear you aren’t listening because there are no words. Just the stillness and the hunger for a faith that assures.” Sometimes, all we have is a faith that is beyond what we can see (Hebrews 11:1). And I believe that this is when we really have the Holy Spirit groaning for us with utterances beyond words. Our advocate and our helper is with us, walking with us, and praying for/with us (Romans 8:26).

While we wait for rescue
With our eyes tightly shut
Face to the ground using our hands
To cover the fatal cut

Though the pain is an ocean
Tossing us around, around, around
You have calmed greater waters
Higher mountains have come down

I will sing of Your mercy
That leads me through valleys of sorrow
To rivers of joy
I will sing of Your mercy
That leads me through valleys of sorrow
To rivers of joy

Alleluia, alleluia
Alleluia, alleluia

I love that the spirit of this song is to simply sink into the pain and wait on your healing. And yet, in the midst of the pain, we keep singing. We sing of your mercy that leads us through valleys of sorrow to the rivers of joy. One day, there will be not just one river, but many rivers of joy for us. There is a hope. Alleluia, alleluia, alleluia, alleluia!

In Jesus’s name I pray,

Amen

 

 
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Posted by on June 16, 2019 in Hebrews, Hymns and Songs, Romans

 

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“Home Free” by Wayne Watson

12 Jun

“Home Free” by Wayne Watson

I’m trying hard not to think you unkind
But Heavenly Father
If you know my heart
Surely you can read my mind
Good people underneath the sea of grief
Some get up and walk away
Some will find ultimate relief

Home Free, eventually
At the ultimate healing we will be Home Free
Home Free, oh I’ve got a feeling
At the ultimate healing
We will be Home Free

Out in the corridors we pray for life
A mother for her baby, A husband for his wife
Sometimes the good die young
It’s sad but true
And while we pray for one more heartbeat
The real comfort is with you

You know pain has little mercy
And suffering’s no respecter of age, of race or position
I know every prayer gets answered
But the hardest one to pray is slow to come
Oh Lord, not mine, but Thy will be done
Let it be…

Home Free, eventually
At the ultimate healing gonna be Home Free
Home Free, oh its more than a feeling
At the ultimate healing
Gonna be Home Free

Songwriters: Bernard Sumner / Gillian Lesley Gilbert / Peter Hook / Stephen Paul David Morris

Dear God, I think I first heard this song around 1992 or 1993. I was a sales rep for Word, the label for Wayne Watson at the time, and I remember being really struck by the words to this song. Now, 26-ish years later, I know it word for word. The amazing thing is how little death I have experienced from my family of origin. At 49, on my side of the family, I haven’t lost anyone beyond grandparents. My parents, siblings, aunts, uncles, and cousins are all still living. But I have watched my wife and her family suffer terrible and tragic losses. The hardest for her was her mother, but she only has one biological aunt remaining, having lost three uncles. Two of her cousins have lost children in horrible accidents. Tragic.

Then there are times when I read a Facebook post like this morning’s from a distant high school friend who lost her mother yesterday. She has simply posted this meme.

I know that’s so true after walking that path with my wife nine years ago–and even still today. So this prayer is for this high school friend, my wife, and everyone else I know who has experienced loss like this recently, including my friend who, last week, discovered his adult daughter, who had died overnight, and the other friend who lost her adult son in a car accident just last week.

Father, you are our ultimate comfort and hope. Help us to know what that means. Help my friends and my wife to discover that hope in a new way. Reveal to us your truth. And let us not forget that it’s okay for us to suffer in loss through death. Jesus suffered too when friends died. Something within us builds around them, and when they are removed it’s just huge. And obviously there’s nothing worse than a child or a parent dying, followed closely I would imagine by spouses and then siblings. Regardless, for these friends and my wife, please comfort them. Help them to just sink into your arms. They will mourn. They will be devastated. Help them to know that it’s okay. They don’t have to rationalize it. They don’t even have to try to convince themselves of the truth of this son so that they will “feel better.” Be their God. Help them to find their comfort in you through others around them.

In Jesus’s name I pray,

Amen

 
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Posted by on June 12, 2019 in Hymns and Songs

 

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Mary & Martha — John 11:28-29

10 Apr

John 11:28-29 [NLT]
Then she returned to Mary. She called Mary aside from the mourners and told her, “The Teacher is here and wants to see you.” So Mary immediately went to him.

Dear God, I’m reading A LOT into this story, and I might be way off base on some of it, but I’m trying to get a feel for why Martha went to see Jesus without Mary the first time. Martha was doing a lot of walking here, going back and forth. And why did Jesus stay where he was instead of going with Martha to the house? Was he trying to avoid all of the mourners as long as he could?

I have never had to face a significant loss like Martha and Mary did here. The closest I’ve come is a mother-in-law nine years ago and my grandparents in my 20s. I would imagine, however, that my response would be much like Martha’s. I would want to keep in motion. I would want to take charge and do the work that needs done. I’m not sure how I would process the mourning part of the experience.

Father, Mary has always been the one held up to us as an example and Martha the cautionary tale. I do think Martha has her good points, however. I just think she needed to be a little more well-rounded. Of course, Mary did too. But Mary allowed herself to grieve. She allowed herself to sit at Jesus’ feet. She allowed herself to give the perfume. Help me to reach that level of sensitivity, generosity, and peace.

In Jesus’s name I pray,

Amen

 
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Posted by on April 10, 2019 in John, Mary & Martha

 

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Every Life Has A Story

27 Feb

Dear God, I read a blog post that was shared on Facebook by a cousin. It’s one of those great reminders about judging/not judging others. It’s about remembering to at least consider the person near you might be going through something more than you understand and to give them a little latitude.

One of the things I show to new staff members and volunteers when they join our nonprofit is a Chick-fil-A training video. The video depicts all of the people in the restaurant at a given moment going about their business, but underneath it captions what’s really going on in their lives. One of the subtle things it does is show the employees as well as the customers. Yes, all of us have something going on.

Father, thank you for the reminder that I need eyes to see, ears to hear, and a heart that can allow for the idea that damage done to the person next to me might be driving their behavior more than bad intentions. As I see board members this morning, my mentee at lunch, and staff, volunteers, patients, and family throughout the day help me to be a source of your peace to them. And please touch and heal my soul as well.

In Jesus’ name I pray,

Amen

 
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Posted by on February 27, 2019 in Miscellaneous

 

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