disdain (noun) : a feeling of contempt for someone or something regarded as unworthy or inferior
anger (noun) : a strong feeling of displeasure and usually of antagonism
Dear God, I think I have some repenting to do this morning. My wife and I were talking about our attitudes towards different people, and my confession to you is that there are some instances in which I have taken disdain and justified it by calling it anger. Where I really got convicted is when I realized that there are certainly people in multiple areas of my life who I think are unworthy of my time.
As I sat and thought about it, the common theme that seems to run through most of them is that I perceive them to be bullies. My closest friend said to me a few years ago, “You don’t like bullies.” And I don’t. I really don’t. I don’t care if I perceive it to be a politician, people within a local church, people I know or know of in our community, or even family, if I think they bully others then I will immediately be against them and have no use for them. In fact, as I sit here and think about it, one of the most difficult managerial situations I had was a past employee who bullied others. I ultimately had to fire him, but I probably put up with his bullying for too long. I see bullies as emotionally, if not physically, abusive. I see them as potential tyrants. I see them as harmful. I see them as dangerous. I can sit and list a whole bunch of adjectives, but the problem I am seeing in myself is that I take that and allow it to become disdain instead of simple anger. I elevate myself above (in my own mind) and approach them self-righteously instead of as an equally loved child of you who, while they might be deserving of productive anger, are not beneath me.
Father, I am sorry for this. I’m sorry for not loving others the way you love them. I’m sorry for judging and simply writing some people off instead of looking for productive, loving, Godly ways of expressing my anger with them for their behaviors (which includes forgiveness, by the way). Jesus had to put up with bullies in his time on earth, and he did it with love and, yes, sometimes with anger. But he also kept to the four tools that he also gave us to use: prayer, service, persuasion and suffering. When he saw the bully, he inserted himself into their path to take their blows. Even now, as I sit here I am thinking about a woman in town who has been the victim of being bullied to some extent. She is in a emotional struggle of her own, trying to find her way, and there are many in your church who are rejecting her. Help me to know how to be her friend and how to approach those who are rejecting her. Help me to know how to be exactly who you need me to be for the sake of my own soul and peace, and also so that your presence, will, and kingdom can come into this earth through my life. And if I didn’t say it enough already, I am sorry, Father.
I pray this in Jesus and with your Holy Spirit,
Amen
Emails to God 