46 Then they reached Jericho, and as Jesus and his disciples left town, a large crowd followed him. A blind beggar named Bartimaeus (son of Timaeus) was sitting beside the road. 47 When Bartimaeus heard that Jesus of Nazareth was nearby, he began to shout, “Jesus, Son of David, have mercy on me!”
48 “Be quiet!” many of the people yelled at him.
But he only shouted louder, “Son of David, have mercy on me!”
49 When Jesus heard him, he stopped and said, “Tell him to come here.”
So they called the blind man. “Cheer up,” they said. “Come on, he’s calling you!” 50 Bartimaeus threw aside his coat, jumped up, and came to Jesus.
51 “What do you want me to do for you?” Jesus asked.
“My Rabbi,” the blind man said, “I want to see!”
52 And Jesus said to him, “Go, for your faith has healed you.” Instantly the man could see, and he followed Jesus down the road.
Mark 10:46-52
Dear God, my wife and I were talking yesterday about the limitations we put on our relationships with you. Specifically, we both talked about specific weaknesses in our individual lives that need healing, but they have become so much a part of us and who we are we aren’t really interested in being healed.
For me, I started to realize this a few weeks ago when I was talking to someone about the Ozempic fad of people taking it as an appetite suppressant for weight loss. While they were talking to me, I thought to myself that I’m not sure I would want to lose my appetite because I enjoy eating and how it is incorporated into my life. Now, to be clear, my eating habits are not great. I am 6’4″ and 245, so I am just on the borderline between overweight and obese. I am fit from a cardiovascular standpoint because I exercise regularly, but as much as I exercise I should be a thinner man. I’ve told people that the combination of my weight and how much I exercise is a testament to how much I eat.
So as I sat there yesterday and talked with my wife, I started to wonder if this is something I need to turn over to you. Do I need to seek your healing? That’s when I had the thought, “I don’t think I want to be healed.” That’s why I went and found this passage this morning about Bartimaeus. I remember Jesus asking Bartimaeus what he wanted from him. It made me think that if you were to ask me this morning, “What do you want from me?” what would be my answer in regards to my eating habits? My addition to eating. Would I say, “I want to be free from eating obsessively,” or would I say, “Nothing. I’m good.”
Father, I am here praying about this before you right now because I think I need to screw up the courage within me to say, “Lord, I want to be healed from my gluttony when it comes to food.” I prayed a few weeks ago about Fr. Mike Schmitz’s called “The Floor.” In it, I listed several things that were the least I could do to be in healthy relationship with you. I think eating healthily and being careful about what I put into my body needs to be added to that list. Okay, I don’t “think.” I know. I need to do this. Even now, as I type this, I am hesitant to even type the words, “Lord, I want to be healed,” but I do. Father, Jesus, Holy Spirit, my Triune God, I want to be healed. I want to be healed from my food addiction. I have faith in you to do it, Lord. I believe in you. Lord, heal me.
I pray this in Jesus and with the Holy Spirit,
Amen
Emails to God 