Emails to God

¹⁷ Then David composed a funeral song for Saul and Jonathan, ¹⁸ and he commanded that it be taught to the people of Judah. It is known as the Song of the Bow, and it is recorded in The Book of Jashar.

¹⁹ Your pride and joy, O Israel, lies dead on the hills!
    Oh, how the mighty heroes have fallen!
²⁰ Don’t announce the news in Gath,
    don’t proclaim it in the streets of Ashkelon,
or the daughters of the Philistines will rejoice
    and the pagans will laugh in triumph.

²¹ O mountains of Gilboa,
    let there be no dew or rain upon you,
    nor fruitful fields producing offerings of grain.
For there the shield of the mighty heroes was defiled;
    the shield of Saul will no longer be anointed with oil.
²² The bow of Jonathan was powerful,
    and the sword of Saul did its mighty work.
They shed the blood of their enemies
    and pierced the bodies of mighty heroes.

²³ How beloved and gracious were Saul and Jonathan!
    They were together in life and in death.
They were swifter than eagles,
    stronger than lions.
²⁴ O women of Israel, weep for Saul,
for he dressed you in luxurious scarlet clothing,
    in garments decorated with gold.

²⁵ Oh, how the mighty heroes have fallen in battle!
    Jonathan lies dead on the hills.
²⁶ How I weep for you, my brother Jonathan!
    Oh, how much I loved you!
And your love for me was deep,
    deeper than the love of women!

²⁷ Oh, how the mighty heroes have fallen!
    Stripped of their weapons, they lie dead.

2 Samuel 1:17-27

Dear God, I’ll be the first to admit I do not understand ancient Israelite song structure, so what I’m going to say will likely sound ignorant to you and to any scholar. With that said, this is fascinating.

First, the fact that David took the time to compose a song when hearing this tragic news. Poetry, song writing, and psalm writing (is there a difference between the three) were obviously a huge part of his nature and identity. He knew he had to write down his emotional response to this in a song. Then, interestingly, he had the authority to get others to sing it with him, even the personal parts about Jonathan.

Second, and this is where song structure might come into play and I can’t tell, his first thoughts are to not let the enemies know because they will delight in the news. They might laugh and celebrate. The thought of their joy in the midst of this personal loss for David and national loss for Israel made him sick. Of course, they would know. Of course, there was no hiding it from them. But he included this part of his emotion in his song.

I would also say that, as the presumptive leader, his first act wasn’t to reassure everyone and tell them it would be okay. It was to kill the man who polished Saul off (even though this seems cruel to me because I think the guy did Saul a favor) and then write this song of mourning. This would be a pattern for David. As your anointed he was good about setting precedent that that anointing was to be respected, both in the stories in 1 Samuel when he had a chance to kill Saul and didn’t do it because of Saul’s anointing, and later with Absolom when he was on the run and depending upon you to restore him to the throne.

Of course, there is the middle of the song that calls on everyone, especially the women, to mourn Saul’s death. He was their king and had done good things. He should be remembered with honor.

The personal part is with Jonathan: “²⁶ How I weep for you, my brother Jonathan! Oh, how much I loved you! And your love for me was deep, deeper than the love of women!” What a personal thing to say! And to have everyone sing along with himself.

And then the classic line, “How the mighty have fallen.” I don’t think I realized this is where it came from. Usually, this is line is more of a criticism and almost a victorious phrase as we look at a hubristic person who has been taken down a few pegs. In fact, this is so different than that, I Googled it to see if this is the origin of the phrase, and, as far as I can tell, it is. But where David sings this as a lament, we have changed it to mockery.

As far as what I would take from this, I see that there is a place for mourning. There is also a place for me to be myself. This part of 2 Samuel 1 is very true to who David was. He was very consistent, including his vulnerability in poetry. So help me to be true to who I am. Help me to bring all of myself to you. Help me to submit all of myself to you. Help me to authentically share who I am with others so that your strength might be made perfect in my weakness. Oh, God, guide me in every moment.

I pray this through the precious, forgiving, redemptive blood of Jesus,

Amen

19 Saul now urged his servants and his son Jonathan to assassinate David. But Jonathan, because of his strong affection for David, ² told him what his father was planning. “Tomorrow morning,” he warned him, “you must find a hiding place out in the fields. ³ I’ll ask my father to go out there with me, and I’ll talk to him about you. Then I’ll tell you everything I can find out.”

⁴ The next morning Jonathan spoke with his father about David, saying many good things about him. “The king must not sin against his servant David,” Jonathan said. “He’s never done anything to harm you. He has always helped you in any way he could. ⁵ Have you forgotten about the time he risked his life to kill the Philistine giant and how the Lord brought a great victory to all Israel as a result? You were certainly happy about it then. Why should you murder an innocent man like David? There is no reason for it at all!”

⁶ So Saul listened to Jonathan and vowed, “As surely as the Lord lives, David will not be killed.”

⁷ Afterward Jonathan called David and told him what had happened. Then he brought David to Saul, and David served in the court as before.

1 Samuel 19:1-7

Dear God, what exactly is my problem? Why am I moping around today? This week? There is so much amazing stuff going on around me. So many things you’ve done to bless me and the work I do. I mean, sure, there is the “Nope cloud” that I’ve talked about before that is always hanging on the horizon. The cause of a constant level of sorrow. But other than that, what exactly is my problem?

I do think that part of it is that I’m tired. I’m always tired this time of year. December and January are the most stressful months for me at work. Not because things are bad, but because there is always so much to do. And there are also so many varied things that need attention. I’m just tired.

I’m relating this to this passage from today’s Old Testament reading because I think the same could be said of Saul. Saul, what exactly is your problem? Jealousy? Insecurity? Things were going very well for him. Why was he so stressed and jealous of David? Because he sensed you had already replaced him as king? Well, fine. Repent, accept your fate and move on. It affects Jonathan more than you anyway, and he seems fine with it (I do love Jonathan).

Father, I am sorry. I’m sorry for…well, I’m just sorry. I’m sorry for not celebrating with you more. I’m sorry for succumbing to the weight of the responsibilities on me instead of laying them at your cross and letting you carry my burden. I’m sorry I’ve tried to do this stuff myself. Make me the leader you need me to be. More importantly, make me the worshipper you need me to be. Make me a sharer of your joy. A sharer of your love and mercy. A sharer of your grace.

I pray all of this through the grace given to me by Jesus,

Amen

As Samuel grew up, the Lord was with him, and everything Samuel said proved to be reliable. And all Israel, from Dan in the north to Beersheba in the south, knew that Samuel was confirmed as a prophet of the Lord. The Lord continued to appear at Shiloh and gave messages to Samuel there at the Tabernacle. And Samuel’s words went out to all the people of Israel.

At that time Israel was at war with the Philistines. The Israelite army was camped near Ebenezer, and the Philistines were at Aphek. The Philistines attacked and defeated the army of Israel, killing 4,000 men. After the battle was over, the troops retreated to their camp, and the elders of Israel asked, “Why did the Lord allow us to be defeated by the Philistines?” Then they said, “Let’s bring the Ark of the Covenant of the Lord from Shiloh. If we carry it into battle with us, it will save us from our enemies.” So they sent men to Shiloh to bring the Ark of the Covenant of the Lord of Heaven’s Armies, who is enthroned between the cherubim. Hophni and Phinehas, the sons of Eli, were also there with the Ark of the Covenant of God. When all the Israelites saw the Ark of the Covenant of the Lord coming into the camp, their shout of joy was so loud it made the ground shake! “What’s going on?” the Philistines asked. “What’s all the shouting about in the Hebrew camp?” When they were told it was because the Ark of the Lord had arrived, they panicked. “The gods have come into their camp!” they cried. “This is a disaster! We have never had to face anything like this before! Help! Who can save us from these mighty gods of Israel? They are the same gods who destroyed the Egyptians with plagues when Israel was in the wilderness. Fight as never before, Philistines! If you don’t, we will become the Hebrews’ slaves just as they have been ours! Stand up like men and fight!” So the Philistines fought desperately, and Israel was defeated again. The slaughter was great; 30,000 Israelite soldiers died that day. The survivors turned and fled to their tents. The Ark of God was captured, and Hophni and Phinehas, the two sons of Eli, were killed.
1 Samuel 3:19-4:11

Dear God, when I read this passage this morning I had two thoughts. First, did Hophni and Phinehas really think they had you going with them as they walked with the Ark of the Covenant? Did they think they owned you? Did they think they could act like they were acting (1 Samuel 2:12-22) and then boldly carry you into their battle? How dare they? Then, my judgmental heart started thinking about the people I think do that. They honor you with their lips but their hearts are far from you (Matthew 15:8). Do they really thinkin they are carrying you into their battles with them? Do they think just because they name you as their god (little “g” intended) they can then expect you to serve them? How dare they? That’s when your Holy Spirit spoke to me and said, “You might want to ask yourself if you ever do that? In fact, have you done that this week? Where has your priority been in spending time with me this week? Are you just expecting me to do what you want, or are you serving me and worshipping me?” So I sit here this morning convicted. Thank you for that conviction.

The other thought I had was the perspective of the Philistines. If they had lost that battle they might have been able to justify the loss. But the way things turned out in 1 Samuel 5 and 6, you left no doubt that you were the God. And instead of turning to you and worshipping you–which would have been an option–they decided they didn’t want any part of you.

Father, Jesus, Holy Spirit, I sit here this morning sorry for not spending more time with you this week. I mean, yes, I did little things here and there, but I didn’t completely submit my heart to you. Help me to do that now. Help me, oh Triune God to be the man you need me to be today. Love through me. Lead through me. Serve through me. Most importantly, draw others to yourself through me.

I pray this in your name,

Amen