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Funeral Songs (Part 2) – “The Love of God” by Rich Mullins

12 Aug

Dear God, as I go through the list of songs that I would have played as part of my own funeral one day, I’m up to the second one for the slideshow. In case anyone is reading these, here is a link to the first entry that will explain this a little more.

So now I’m up to “The Love of God” by Rich Mullins. I actually just journaled on this song a couple of weeks ago, but this is a different topic and reason for looking at this song so I’ll press on.

Here are the lyrics:

“The Love of God” by Rich Mullins

There’s a wideness in God’s mercy
I cannot find in my own
And it keeps this fire burning
To melt this heart of stone
It keeps me aching with the yearning
It keeps me glad to have been caught
In the reckless, raging fury
They call the Love of God

Now I have seen no band of angels
But I’ve heard the soldiers’ song
Love hangs over them like a banner
Love within them leads them on
To the battle on the journey
And it’s never going to stop
Ever widening their mercies
And the fury of his love

Oh, the love of God!
Oh, the love of God!
The love of God!

Joy and sorrow are in this oceans
They’re in its every ebb and flow
Now the Lord a door has opened
That all hell could never close
Here I’m tested and made worthy
Tossed about, yet lifted up
In the reckless, raging fury
That they call the love of God

I can’t for the life of me figure out why Rich said one time that he didn’t particularly care for this song. Was there something about it with which he disagreed? Were there too many times when he didn’t feel your reckless, raging fury of love?

Today, I want to focus on the mercy part of this song. In the second verse it says, “Now I have seen no band of angels/But I’ve heard the soldiers’ song/Love hangs over them like a banner/Love within them leads them on/To the battle on the journey/And it’s never going to stop/Ever widening their mercy/And the fury of his love.” It’s the journey that grows us. It’s the battle. It’s the battle against Satan. And we can fall victim to his plans or we can walk under your banner of love. Your love drives us forward. We carry your love and your Holy Spirit into the battle. And if we will stay under your banner then the battle will refine us and widen our mercy for others. It will also reveal to us more and more the fury of your love. Sorry, Rich, but you’re wrong. This is a great song.

Father, I am about to talk to a congregation about bitterness and unforgiveness. Absalom was obviously just going through the motions when he did sacrifices to you. It was a ritual to him–it wasn’t worship. If it had really been worship then he would have known that he would only be able to be king if you ordained it, not because he was good enough. Help everything that I do in relation to you be through true, God-seeking, Holy Spirit-driven, and Jesus’ redemption-receiving worship.

I pray all of this in Jesus’ name,

Amen

 
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Posted by on August 12, 2018 in Funeral Songs, Hymns and Songs

 

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Funeral Songs (Part 1) – “Elijah” by Rich Mullins

11 Aug

Dear God, I was talking with a friend recently about the songs I would want played at my funeral. I have a couple in mind, but as I woke up this morning and thought about praying to you in this journal, I got to wondering about those songs and what they say both about my relationship with you and what they reveal about what I want to say to others in one last message to them.

So, first, I need to look at the songs. Here is what I have:

If I can’t speak at my funeral, and I won’t get to write the eulogy, these will be my words to the people there. What am I trying to say with each one?

“Elijah“

The Jordan is waiting for me to cross through
My heart is aging, I can tell
So, Lord, I’m begging for one last favor from you
Here’s my heart, take it where you will
This life has shown me how we’re mended and how we’re torn
How it’s okay to be lonely as long as we’re free
Sometimes my ground was stony, and sometimes covered up with thorns
And only you could make it what it had to be
And not that it’s done, Well, if they dressed me like a pauper
Or if they dined me like a prince
If they lay me with my fathers
Or if my ashes scatter on the wind I don’t care!

When I leave I want to go out like Elijah
With a whirlwind to fuel my chariot of fire
And when I look back on the starts
Well it’ll be like a candlelight in Central Park
And it won’t break my heart to say goodbye

There’s people been friendly, but they’d never be your friend
Sometimes this has bent me to the ground
Now that this is all ending, I want to hear some music once again
‘Cause it’s the finest thing I have ever found
But the Jordan is waiting, Though I ain’t never seen the other side
They say you can’t take in the things you have here
So on the road to salvation, I stick out my thumb and He gives me a ride
And His music is already falling on my ears

There’s people been talking, They say they’re worried about my sould
Well, I’m here to tell you I’ll keep rocking, ’til I’m sure it’s my time to roll
And when I do

When I leave I wan to go out like Elijah,
With a whirlwind to fuel my chariot of fire
And when I look back on the stars
Well, it’ll be like a candlelight in Central Park
And it won’t break my heart to say goodbye

I think I want this song to kick off the slideshow (is this prayer too morbid?), but I think I’ll need to make sure the lyrics for all of these songs are provided for people to at least look at later.

Rich died in a dramatic car accident about one month shy of his 42nd birthday, but then I guess you know that. But I think he wrote this song in his 20s. I try to imagine him reading the story of Elijah and putting himself in Elijah’s position, but I’ve always found it interesting that someone so young could write the lyrics, “my heart is aging, I can tell.” I think there are moments, no matter how young we are, when we feel beaten down and our hearts feel old. Even a 15-year-old can experience an old-feeling heart. But there is something about this song that just feels hopeful. It speaks a message to me that says, “Yes, you can get tired on this journey, but there will be some goodness and some respite on the way–and believe me, there’s something amazing to come.

I really like the second verse when it talks about the music: “Now that this is all ending, I want to hear some music once again/’Cause it’s the finest thing I have ever found…So on the road to salvation, I stick out my thumb and He gives me a ride/And His music is already falling on my ears.” Obviously as a musician, Rich loved music. But I think most of us do. You built us to love music in a special way for some reason. Words put to a tune are even easier to remember than words without a tune. I like how he mentions here that he can imagine something that he loves this side of the Jordan is provided for, and even more so, on the other side of the Jordan.

Father, I think I’m going to spend the next few days going through these songs and thinking about why they touch me and what I hope they say about me and about you to those who are gathered to look back on my life. If nothing else, my desire is that they will see someone with flaws–many, many flaws–but who earnestly loved you and did his best to get over himself and point others to you.

In Jesus’ name I pray,

Amen

 
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Posted by on August 11, 2018 in Funeral Songs, Hymns and Songs

 

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John 6:30-35

10 Aug

30 They answered, “Show us a miraculous sign if you want us to believe in you. What can you do? 31 After all, our ancestors ate manna while they journeyed through the wilderness! The Scriptures say, ‘Moses gave them bread from heaven to eat.’”

32 Jesus said, “I tell you the truth, Moses didn’t give you bread from heaven. My Father did. And now he offers you the true bread from heaven. 33 The true bread of God is the one who comes down from heaven and gives life to the world.”

34 “Sir,” they said, “give us that bread every day.”

35 Jesus replied, “I am the bread of life. Whoever comes to me will never be hungry again. Whoever believes in me will never be thirsty.
John 6:30-35

Dear God, this is an example of people having two different conversations while they talk to each other. The people, in their ignorance and human limitations, are speaking through one paradigm while Jesus is operating in a totally different realm. They are comparing him to Moses (while still messing up the story and ascribing the provision of manna to Moses instead of you), but he is telling them that he is you–he is God.

I have to tell you that I have done my best to come to you and eat of your bread, but there are times when I am still hungry. I put that on myself and not you. I come, but I don’t stay. I wander off. I start to chase my own nose. I let anger take over. And then I find myself hungry. At least I’ve learned enough to return to you. And you’re right–no matter my situation, there is a joy and a peace that passes understanding

I was talking with a friend this morning about some of our respective vices, and I told him that I’ve gotten better at submitting them to you by rejecting self-pity in any given situation and leaning on you for any perceived injustice I am facing. It’s my self-pity and selfishness that leads me down the trail of vice. It is my submission that leads me to freedom.

Father, those people didn’t really understand who they were talking to, and I don’t know that I would have been any different if I had been there. In fact, I do know and I wouldn’t have. I would have been exactly like them. So I’m sorry. I’m sorry for the selfishness and self-pity that I still allow to take over my heart. Make me an instrument of your peace by starting with allowing you to bring peace to my heart.

In Jesus’ name I pray,

Amen

 
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Posted by on August 10, 2018 in John

 

Psalm 130

08 Aug

From the depths of despair, O Lord, I call for your help. Hear my cry, O Lord. Pay attention to my prayer. Lord, if you kept a record of our sins, who, O Lord, could ever survive? But you offer forgiveness, that we might learn to fear you. I am counting on the Lord; yes, I am counting on him. I have put my hope in his word. I long for the Lord more than sentries long for the dawn, yes, more than sentries long for the dawn. O Israel, hope in the Lord; for with the Lord there is unfailing love. His redemption overflows. He himself will redeem Israel from every kind of sin.

Psalm 130:1-8

Dear God, I’m a few days I’m going to be preaching about Absalom and his bitterness towards his father. This is the psalm for the day, and I am glad that it deals with forgiveness and repentance.

As I read the entire story of Absalom and David, it’s a story of foolishness on David’s part and unforgiveness on Absalom’s. It seems like David is continuously making the wrong move. He doesn’t do anything to punish the rape of his daughter by his son or protect her after the rape. He doesn’t know how to handle it when Absalom takes matters into his own hands and kills his brother (David’s son), and he makes a series of mistakes with him. And he has obviously stopped being the king to the people that he needs to be because they were ripe for the picking when Absalom came along.

For his part, Absalom let his rage and self-righteousness consume him. It drove him to murder. It drove him to treason. It ultimately drove him to his death. And at the end of the day, the victimization of this poor girl was never effectively dealt with. Her attacker was killed and she was hidden away for the rest of her life.

So when I am wronged, what do I do with my anger. I saw something earlier today that said, “The sad thing about betrayal is that is always done by a friend and not an enemy.” My first thought was, Well, it’s done by a future enemy. But does that person have to become an enemy? Do we have to assume the worst in people? Can we look beyond the betrayal and try to understand if there was a legitimate reason for them to do what they did? Don’t you really call us to be your people and to be reconciled to you and one another?

Father, help me to model this, and also help me to teach it. Help me to teach it to the people this Sunday. Help me to teach it to my staff who have conflicts. Help me to teach it to my children. And help me to live it in every area of my life.

In Jesus’ name I pray,

Amen

 
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Posted by on August 8, 2018 in Psalms

 

“Worth it All” by Rita Springer

07 Aug

“Worth it All” by Rita Springer

I don’t understand your ways
Oh, but I will give you my song
Give you all of my praise
You hold on to all my pain
And with it you are pulling me closer
And pulling me into your ways

Now around every corner
And up every mountain
I’m not looking for crowns
O

 

r the water from fountains
I’m desperately seeking
And frantically believing
That the sight of your face
is all that I’m needing.
I will say to you…

It’s going to be worth it
It’s going to be worth it
It’s going to be worth it
It’s going to be worth it all
I believe it
It’s going to be worth it
It’s going to be worth it
It’s going to be worth it all

 

Dear God, I felt like I just needed to spend some time in worship this morning. I have some things happening around me that are overwhelming me, and yet I have found you meeting me “around every corner.” There are some things happening that make my heart hurt–some personal, some professional–and yet I still find you.

I had a friend some to me a few days ago and express her own frustration at some things that are happening in her life, and, frankly, they are similar to something my wife and I are experiencing. As I’ve thought about her situation and my situation, I’ve thought about how much you have helped me. You’ve helped me to be at peace. You’ve helped my wife and me work together to face some tough issues. You’ve brought us miraculous, providential kindness. And I literally don’t know where I would be without coming to you as an individual and praying with her daily.

Father, you offer so much. You aren’t offering us earthly crowns. If those come, it is because…well, I don’t know they rhyme or reason for earthly crowns. But I know that I really am at peace without one. I just want to be your servant, play the role in my surroundings that you want me to play, and worship the God in heaven who makes my life worth living.

In Jesus’ name I pray,

Amen

 
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Posted by on August 7, 2018 in Hymns and Songs

 

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Psalm 119:160

06 Aug

The very essence of your words is truth;
    all your just regulations will stand forever.
Psalm 119:160

Dear God, I heard someone say a few days ago that binding ourselves to you is where we will find the most freedom. On the surface, that seems paradoxical. How can I experience more freedom if I am submitting to you, your truth, your regulations, and your call on my life?

But the real truth is that we all serve something. We all submit to something. And freedom can also have a lot of meanings. First, in the moments when I am not serving you, I am serving my own self-interests and myself. Or maybe I am codependent with someone else, but even that codependence is serving a need that I have at some level. And yes, I have the “freedom” to make those choices, but that “freedom” will ultimately lock me into a corner where, in order to keep serving myself, I have to sacrifice truth and I am not longer “free” to make my own choices. My self interest dictates my actions.

On the other had, if I have died to myself then the world is open to me. I can seek you and follow wherever you lead. And your path might lead me to hardship, but even the hardships almost always make me a better person, more in tune with you. And you wired me (and all of us) to give ourselves away, love others, and find satisfaction and joy in self sacrifice.

Father, I embrace your truth and your just regulations. May they last forever. I know I fail you. I know that I break away and pursue my own agenda sometimes. I know I can be self-indulgent. I’m sorry for that. I also know that the more success I have in denying that part of me the more I am able to embrace your joy and peace. So given that, give me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, the courage to change the things I can, and the wisdom to know the difference.

In Jesus’ name I pray,

Amen

 
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Posted by on August 6, 2018 in Psalms

 

2 Samuel 17:1-4

04 Aug

Now Ahithophel urged Absalom, “Let me choose 12,000 men to start out after David tonight. I will catch up with him while he is weary and discouraged. He and his troops will panic, and everyone will run away. Then I will kill only the king, and I will bring all the people back to you as a bride returns to her husband. After all, it is only one man’s life that you seek. Then you will be at peace with all the people.” This plan seemed good to Absalom and to all the elders of Israel.

2 Samuel 17:1-4

Dear God, the judge period wasn’t perfect, but look what has happened within two generation of the “king” period—and this is under Israel’s BEST king! One of David’s best advisers is plotting to kill him.

I wonder what it was about what David had become that had the people so ready to turn on him. Was Ahithophel angry and disenchanted with David, or was he just trying to promote himself? I think an overlooked part of this story is that David had allowed his power to change him, and the people were longing for the old David—the David that Absalom was pretending to be.

Father, there’s a lesson in here for all of us. A past of pursuing you can always lead to a future of not pursuing you. There is nothing in the last six chapters that gives us a positive picture about David’s actions EXCEPT that he is able to receive rebuke when it comes his way. But there were many things to rebuke. So help me to be vigilant in my pursuit of you. “Make my life a prayer to you. I want to do what you want me to. No empty words and no white lies. No token prayers. No compromise.” (Melody Green)

In Jesus’ name I pray,

Amen

 
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Posted by on August 4, 2018 in 2 Samuel

 

2 Samuel 16:5-13

03 Aug

5 As King David came to Bahurim, a man came out of the village cursing them. It was Shimei son of Gera, from the same clan as Saul’s family.6 He threw stones at the king and the king’s officers and all the mighty warriors who surrounded him. 7 “Get out of here, you murderer, you scoundrel!” he shouted at David. 8 “The Lord is paying you back for all the bloodshed in Saul’s clan. You stole his throne, and now the Lord has given it to your son Absalom. At last you will taste some of your own medicine, for you are a murderer!”

9 “Why should this dead dog curse my lord the king?” Abishai son of Zeruiah demanded. “Let me go over and cut off his head!”

10 “No!” the king said. “Who asked your opinion, you sons of Zeruiah! If the Lord has told him to curse me, who are you to stop him?”

11 Then David said to Abishai and to all his servants, “My own son is trying to kill me. Doesn’t this relative of Saulb]”>[b] have even more reason to do so? Leave him alone and let him curse, for the Lord has told him to do it. 12 And perhaps the Lord will see that I am being wrongedc]”>[c] and will bless me because of these curses today.” 13 So David and his men continued down the road, and Shimei kept pace with them on a nearby hillside, cursing and throwing stones and dirt at David.
2 Samuel 16:5-13

Dear God, maybe sometimes we need to be broken down a bit. When I read this whole section of 2 Samuel, starting with chapter 11 and Bathsheba, I see a pattern of David just not doing it right. Was he corrupted? Yeah, probably. Was he maybe a little depressed after Nathan rebuked him in chapter 12 and he lost the baby? Maybe. Either way, the people were obviously not impressed with him, and his son was angry to the point of executing a coup d’etat and trying to humiliate, kill and overthrow him.

But 2 Samuel 16:10-12 is what makes David different–the ability to receive rebuke. The willingness to examine himself and submit to judgment. He also had a certain level of empathy for the descendants of Saul. There was probably always a part of him that felt awkward about having ascended to the throne, even though it was your will.

Father, help me to embrace the part of David I find here in verses 10-12. Help me to welcome correction and respond to it humbly and constructively. Help me to also be willing to humbly approach others with empathy. Love through me and help me to not return evil for evil.

In Jesus’ name I pray,

Amen

 
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Posted by on August 3, 2018 in 2 Samuel

 

2 Samuel 13 & 14

02 Aug

2 Samuel 13 & 14 – Amnon, Absalom, and David

Dear God, this story isn’t as much about sin as it is about how we handle our anger. There are people making mistakes all over the place here.

  1. Amnon raped his sister and destroyed her life.
  2. David, for whatever reason, did nothing about it.
  3. Absalom, for whatever reason (perhaps he knew David wouldn’t allow it), never called out Amnon for what he did, but instead spent two years planning his murder.
  4. David had no idea how to handle any of this and only made things worse at every turn.

One of the lessons for me, I believe, is that there needs to be an acknowledgment of sin when I commit it, a wise, appropriate confrontation of sin when I witness it, and an emotional letting go of my anger after the sin is confronted. That doesn’t mean that something like what Amnon did shouldn’t be punished. It means that what everyone did here was the absolute worst thing they could have done.

My wife and I were talking this morning about someone with whom we are both angry. She is having a harder time with her anger than I am, but that is just in this case. I have a harder time than she does with others. But what will either of us do with our anger? Will it consume us until we plot revenge, or will be confront and release?

Father, there are some huge lessons in here for us. This story will continue with Absalom’s rebellion and attempt to overthrow David. More pain is in all of their futures, including Israel’s. Help my wife and me to not let these cancers of anger and hatred grow. Remove them through the power of your blood and your grace.

In Jesus’ name I pray,

Amen

 
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Posted by on August 2, 2018 in 2 Samuel

 

Genesis 4:1-16

01 Aug

Now Adam had sexual relations with his wife, Eve, and she became pregnant. When she gave birth to Cain, she said, “With the Lord’s help, I have produced a man!” Later she gave birth to his brother and named him Abel. When they grew up, Abel became a shepherd, while Cain cultivated the ground. When it was time for the harvest, Cain presented some of his crops as a gift to the Lord. Abel also brought a gift—the best portions of the firstborn lambs from his flock. The Lord accepted Abel and his gift, but he did not accept Cain and his gift. This made Cain very angry, and he looked dejected. “Why are you so angry?” the Lord asked Cain. “Why do you look so dejected? You will be accepted if you do what is right. But if you refuse to do what is right, then watch out! Sin is crouching at the door, eager to control you. But you must subdue it and be its master.” One day Cain suggested to his brother, “Let’s go out into the fields.” And while they were in the field, Cain attacked his brother, Abel, and killed him. Afterward the Lord asked Cain, “Where is your brother? Where is Abel?” “I don’t know,” Cain responded. “Am I my brother’s guardian?” But the Lord said, “What have you done? Listen! Your brother’s blood cries out to me from the ground! Now you are cursed and banished from the ground, which has swallowed your brother’s blood. No longer will the ground yield good crops for you, no matter how hard you work! From now on you will be a homeless wanderer on the earth.” Cain replied to the Lord, “My punishment is too great for me to bear! You have banished me from the land and from your presence; you have made me a homeless wanderer. Anyone who finds me will kill me!” The Lord replied, “No, for I will give a sevenfold punishment to anyone who kills you.” Then the Lord put a mark on Cain to warn anyone who might try to kill him. So Cain left the Lord’s presence and settled in the land of Nod, east of Eden.

Genesis 4:1-16

Dear God, I saw the name of a Christian song the other day called “Able.” Even though it was spelled differently than the Abel of the Old Testament, it made me think of this story.

Corruption starts with the smallest of sins. I heard a presentation last Thursday on ethics that talked about the path to immorality starting very small. In this case, Cain didn’t want to give up the best of his crop. Part of his heart wanted to hold on to it. Eat it for himself. Now that I look at it, it’s a little like his parents wanting to eat the good fruit. Selfishness is so seductive.

My wife and I give, and we try to give generously, but are there parts of my life that I still want to embrace instead of letting them go? Are some of my material possessions getting in the way of generosity you want me to have? Do I still hold on to little sins that pull my heart away from you?

Father, I offer all of this to you. Help me to work out my faith through the guidance of your Holy Spirit. Reveal to me the things I allow in my life that keep me from being yours. Be glorified through me.

In Jesus’ name I pray,

Amen

 
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Posted by on August 1, 2018 in Genesis

 
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