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Category Archives: Miscellaneous

“If they ain’t following you, you ain’t leading.” Skye Jethani

Dear God, I was listening to The Holy Post podcast from last week earlier today, and there was a part that really struck me. It starts at the 40:30 mark. They were talking about how evangelical leaders are making public statements regarding different social and political issues and yet evangelical people, when surveyed do not, for the most part, support those views. For example, in 2017, there were evangelical leaders who have said that it is important for the United States to be a place for legal immigrants to be able to come, but, when surveyed, a majority of white evangelicals support limiting legal immigration–more so than any other religious group surveyed. When one host, Phil Vischer, asked another, Sky Jethani, what he thought of that, Skye said, “It’s very simple: If they ain’t following, you ain’t leading.”

It made me think about a Baptist pastor in the town where I live. I was in a meeting among several pastors a couple of weeks ago, and the Baptist pastor, who has trained pastors in third-world countries in different parts of the world, said something to the effect that one thing he learned in the pandemic is that he thought they had a church where people were really seeking you, but what he’s found is that they have a social organization where like-minded people are getting together to socialize. The different agendas people have brought to the table since the pandemic and some of the decisions the church has made in relation to meetings has revealed the true character of the church. There was absolute silence when he said it.

Back to the podcast, they started talking about what each of us allows into our heads that shapes our thoughts, theology, and worldview. For example, if I give my church one hour of influence over me a week, how much time am I giving to news (and which news), television, music, movies, etc.? Phil Vischer mentioned (50:30 mark) that he normally spends time in personal Bible study, but lately decided to give himself over to some teaching from a theologian he trusts to allow that person to shape and/or challenge some of Phil’s perspective. The example he gave was a biblical commentary from Scot McKnight, a respected theologian, on the Sermon on the Mount.

That brings me to the last podcast host, Christian Taylor, who talked about a pastor, Matt Murdock at Church of the Resurrection, encouraging the parishioners to take an inventory of what influences them throughout the week (45:45 mark). What is everything I listen to/watch/consume? Who do I talk to? What all influences me? It doesn’t all have to be sacred, but what am I letting in? How am I using each day to know you better? As I envision doing this inventory, I almost envision the Weight Watchers point system. I can get some sweets, but too much is too much. Over time, I think the Holy Spirit will guide me to the answer of how much is too much.

The last part of the conversation is that evangelical leaders need to figure out the new paradigm of leading and influencing in this new age. They are using a 19th century model for parishioners living in a 21st century world.

Father, help me find good people to follow, and help me to be a good example for those who depend upon me to lead. Help me to see what you see, learn what you have for me to learn, and worship you the way you deserve to be worshipped. Do it all for your glory and so that others around me might be drawn to you, your salvation, your peace, and your path for them.

In Jesus’s name I pray,

Amen

 
 

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Secular Christmas

Dear God, I was thinking abut topics for my prayer time with you today, and then it hit me. It started with how I feel about Christmas Eve now vs. when I was a child.

When I was little, it was all about the presents that were coming for me and the presents I was giving others. Presents, presents, presents. Then, when I was about 9 or 10 years old we started doing church on Christmas Eve. Christmas started to take on a more appropriate celebration of Jesus’s birth and incarnation. Later, as I moved away, it became about going home to visit for the holidays and then taking my wife and eventually children to visit our families at some point around Christmas. Jesus was still there, but there were, I don’t want to say “obligations,” because the word is more positive than that. I suppose there were emotional pulls to try to see family.

Of course, then we had children and it became about making it fun (and yet somehow meaningful in a Jesus-centric way) for them. Outside of my own childhood years, those might have been my favorite. It was a lot of fun to shower them with love, and they were young enough where they could receive it with complete joy.

Now, I am at the age where the kids are living in other places and there aren’t really things they want that they don’t just buy for themselves. This is the first year for my wife when both of her parents are gone. In fact, she told me it struck her that she doesn’t have anyone to buy a Christmas present for from her family of origin this year. That’s a weird feeling that I haven’t experienced. So we have each other. It’s Christmas Eve. I saw my parents briefly yesterday, in a safe, socially-distanced way. Our son and his dog will be here for the day tomorrow. And we will Zoom with my family of origin and our daughter tomorrow as well. We bought some presents for our children and my parents to express our love, but it’s more about the thought of the gift rather than what the gifts are. It’s different.

Which leads me to what I want to talk about this morning. I realized that all of the cultural Christmas things I have been experiencing over the last four weeks are completely secular. The TV shows and movies have nothing to do with you. In fact, I looked at the top 10 Christmas movies as rated by some group. They were 10.) National Lampoon’s Christmas Vacation 9.) The Nightmare Before Christmas 8.) A Christmas Carol (1951) 7.) The Apartment 6.) Elf 5.) The Muppet Christmas Carol 4.) Home Alone 3.) Miracle on 34th Street 2.) A Christmas Story 1.) It’s a Wonderful Life. Even A Christmas Carol, in any of its renditions, really doesn’t have anything to do with you. It’s about the human heart, but nothing about reconciliation.

I probably need to go back and watch The Nativity. It was a really well-done depiction of Mary and Joseph’s journey up to Jesus’s birth. I think I’ve watched it twice. I supposed I should have watched it more. Why haven’t I?

Father, I really do want to spend this day in gratitude for you. My wife is important. My children and family of origin are important. Helping a family that is unknown to me with Christmas presents is important. But I don’t want to take you for granted any more than I already do. I am really grateful to you. Please help me to love you and then channel your love to others. And thank you for Jesus’s incarnation.

I pray all of this in Jesus’s name,

Amen

 
 

Luke 1 – Prophecy

Dear God, this is the time of the Christmas season when we start to look at the prophecies that lead up to Jesus’s birth and life and marvel at how you enabled people to foresee what would happen. Isaiah. David. Zechariah (John the Baptist’s father). So many others. Sure, sometimes I read these passages that are supposed to be prophecies and I wonder if we aren’t stretching just a little, but that’s not the point of what I’m talking about here. What is the point? It’s that even those who lived to see them fulfilled didn’t realize what was happening until after it was all over.

Take Zechariah, for example, in Luke 1. He gets his angel visit and then is muted until eight days after John the Baptist is born. For those 10-ish months, he had a lot of time to think. He presumably communicated via writing to Elizabeth because she knew to name their son John (Luke 1:61), but he sat silent. During that 10 months, he saw Mary come and visit them. She had her own extraordinary story about an angel visit and being pregnant. Elizabeth’s baby in the womb leapt when he heard the sound of Mary’s voice. Some really great stuff was happening. So what did he do? He misinterpreted it. Here are some examples of what he got wrong in his own prophecy (at least as he understood it in the moment): (Verse 71) “Now we will be saved from our enemies and from all who hate us.” (Verses 74 and 75) “We have been rescued from our enemies so we can serve God without fear, in holiness and righteousness for as long as we live.” Sure, out of 12 verses he only missed on three, but, still, I know he would have been shocked if someone had told him exactly what was going to happen over the next 34 years. I’m sure he didn’t live to see it since he was “very old” (verse 7) when he got his angel visit, but it would have devastated him that day to know how his son’s life would end.

I think that’s why it is important to not try to figure out the bigger meaning of what is happening or what might happen right now. I have a friend who is an Aggie football fan. Okay, I have two friends who are Aggie football fans, and each of them sent me a long text this week detailing what has to happen for Texas A&M to make the college football playoff. I replied back that they just need to win and not worry about the rest because it will work itself out. They are ranked 5th. There are four teams in front of them and two of them play each other one more time. But Texas A&M still has three games left. There is no chance they get into the playoff without winning those games, so just win. Take each moment at a time–each play at a time–and win your games. The odds are that the rest will take care of itself.

The same is true for me. There are too many moving parts in life for me to figure out. I have my hopes for my children, but I have no idea which actions I take today will lead them down your path for them. The same is true for my work, my marriage, my community, my church, and my world. I don’t can’t sit and make the list of all of the steps that need to happen to achieve what I want to achieve. I just need to play the next play as best as I can. Today, that means starting this Saturday with this prayer time before I get about helping my wife decorate for Christmas, watch some college football, and meet with a friend about appraising some furniture.

Father, help me to just take life “one play at a time.” And sometimes the right play might be to lose a battle. I might need to take an intentional safety in order to get where I want to go. I might have to let the other team score to get the ball back one more time. So I put the outcomes of each activity in your hand, trusting that you will not let anything happen that is outside of your will. I will just show up for the next play. Holy Spirit, please be with me, guide me, and empower me to do what I need to do.

In Jesus’s name I pray,

Amen

 
 

New Roots

Inspired by a Brené Brown interview with Bishop Michael Curry.

Dear God, I’m taking this one small comment from Bishop Michael Curry as I pray to you this morning. But first, I’m not sure what happened to me yesterday, but I’m sorry for just kind of shutting down. I had just had a week off, and it was my last Sunday before going back to work, and I just went almost into a hibernation. And I’m not totally sure it was the wrong thing to do as I get ready to start a very busy season at work, but I know I could have done more to spend some time with you, at the very least. So I am sorry for not spending some time with you yesterday.

Now, on to this concept from Bishop Curry. Basically, he was saying that as it relates to a lot of things in our lives during this pandemic–from church, to social activities, to family, to work, to school, etc.–we are like a plant/tree that has had its water source taken away or dry up. We now need to do what they do–develop new roots that will find the water we need. That starts with you. I need to figure out how to ensure I am still getting the balance of spiritual nourishment, prayer, and worship that I need. The same is true for other areas of my life as well, but let me just focus on you this morning.

It is important that I continue to tap into you. I need to be intentional and creative. I need to be innovative and self-disciplined. Otherwise, my spiritual life can wither and die just like anyone else’s. I haven’t achieved anything in life to the level that I can face all of this on my own. In fact, I never will achieve that level because I need you. I need you. I need you today as I go back to work. I need you as I meet challenges. I need you as I love my wife and family. I need you as I figure out how to respond to the world around me. I need you. And if I don’t keep my roots tapped into you then I will fail.

Father, hep me to be intentional about my pursuit of you. Help me to be exactly what you need me to be, but I know you can only do that if I a plugged into you, and I have a lot of responsibility in that. So I am sorry for not doing more yesterday to be one with you, and I commit to you that I will sacrifice myself today in an effort to be one with you. Holy Spirit, please help me.

In Jesus’s name I pray,

Amen

 
 

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The Church is Soft

Dear God, I heard two different pastors today say, in essence, “The church is soft.” The first was Andy Stanley’s September 13, 2020 Sermon (Be Rich 2020). Here is a quote from it:

“[Questions regarding COVID-19 that ask if these are the end times or if God is punishing us and we need to repent] are not the kinds of questions that first-century Christians asked when faced with similar circumstances. And, just my opinion, I think our fascination with these kinds of questions reveal, in some cases a limited knowledge or a limited understanding of history and of the suffering that people in other parts of the world have had to navigate for generations, and that many people were navigating in this generation before the appearance of COVID-19. Which makes me wonder–perhaps the question we all should be asking is this one: Why, why do Americans, and I’m including myself, why do Americans have such a low pain threshold? Because we really do, don’t we? Me included. And part of the answer to this question is, ‘We are so blessed. We are so resourced. We’ve been so protected.’ And those of you who have traveled to different and difficult regions of the world, you know this to be the case. You know that us Americans have high expectations of how we expect or deserve to be treated. We don’t want to be told no. We feel like we have the right to do pretty much whatever we want. In fact, think about this. The fact that fights have broken out and guns have been drawn over wearing a face mask in Walmart, on airliners…I mean, that should tell us a little something about our low tolerance for discomfort.

Later, I was mowing the lawn and couldn’t decide what I wanted to listen to, so I pulled up some recordings I have of Chuck Swindoll teaching a survey of the different books of the Bible. This was probably recorded in the 1981-ish time period. In the one on Acts he said:

“May I interrupt this time to say something straight to all of us? I don’t think we are tough enough in this generation. Now there are some beautiful exceptions, and you who are tough, you who are resilient, you spur us on when we get weak. But for the most part the church is getting a little flabby. Getting a little lazy. We get a little persecution that washes over us and, oh my, we’re ready to close up the book, and walk away and say, ‘Leave it to somebody else.’ I long for that pioneer spirit that didn’t just simply make this country great, but it made the church great. Some of those soldiers of the cross. Those warriors of the land. Those who refuse to lay back and let the responsibility rest with just a few off there in the limelight. People who rolled up their sleeves. Stout-hearted Christian men and women who put it together and stayed to the task. If you find yourself a little lazy, a little laid back more than you once were. If it’s beginning to bother you get a big dose of the book of Acts.

The order in which this all came up for me this morning was first listening to Andy Stanley’s sermon based out of Acts while I was working out and then I decided to listen to Chuck Swindoll’s survey of Acts while I was mowing the lawn. It’s interesting that both of them, when comparing the modern American church to the church in Acts, said the modern American church is soft.

I still think back on an editorial I read for a Christian back in the 2016 election cycle. He said that Christians in America have made an idol out of the Supreme Court. We vote for a President who we think will nominate the justices we want, and then we sit back and wait for them to do our work for us. There are two problems with that strategy: 1.) We abdicate our need to get involved and 2.) the conservative-leaning court often votes against what the conservatives wanted (e.g. it was a conservative court that ruled on Roe v. Wade). For for pro-life Christians, are we ready to do the work to support women and help them NOT choose abortion and, should something happen and abortion be outlawed in parts of the nation, are we ready to step up and work to help those children and their mothers?

Another question is, should church leadership hide from religious persecution. Should we want a government that will protect us as Christians, or should we want to experience the struggle of the church against the culture because it is the struggle that makes us stronger? As Swindoll put it, we are flabby. Said another way, we are fat and happy, and that’s a dangerous place to me. And when I say, “We,” I’m right in there with the rest. One of my biggest weaknesses as a leader at work is that I shun risk for safety. How much does my desire for safety limit my willingness to hear what you might be calling me to do.

Father, help me to not run from risk, but to prudently determine your will for me. Help me to shun self-pity when it comes to how I (or my church) am treated by society. Help me to embrace the responsibility to innovate under your guidance and provision. Help me to accept personal failure if it means advancing your Kingdom.

In Jesus’s name I pray,

Amen

 
 

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“Fear is the path to the dark side” — Yoda

“Fear is the path to the dark side. Fear lead to anger. Anger leads to hate. Hate leads to suffering.” Yoda

Dear God, I know that George Lucas wasn’t referencing you with all of the “force” talk in Star Wars, but there is some truth in it. I think Jesus tried to teach us something similar about hate and loving our enemies

“You have heard the law that says, ‘Love your neighbor,’ and hate your enemy. But I say, love your enemies! Pray for those who persecute you! In that way you will be acting as true children of your Father in heaven.” (Matthew 5:43-45a)

So why does it feel so good to give in to the hate? Why do I find myself wanting to sink into the news and hate people who are on the other side of the political spectrum than me? It feels so good to see them experience pain or disappointment. It feels so good to try to prove them wrong. Before I know it, I’m reading news articles that will bring me good news of their destruction. 

It’s interesting that Yoda stars with fear in that quote above. Is there something I’m afraid of that drives my fear. Is my disease fear and the symptom is hate? I’d say that line from George Lucas is pretty brilliant and probably right. There are all kinds of verses about fearing not. Jesus goes into it several times, talking about how we worry about things over which we have no control. Consider the lilies of the field, and all of that. 

So what scares me and why does it scare me? Am I scared of someone being president? Am I scared of threats to the economy? Am I scared of other nations? Am I scared I won’t get my way? 

Father, reveal to me where I am scared and not trusting you. Help me to pray for both men currently running for president. And do with our nation what you will. You know the path you have for us. You know what you want to happen in the world. Help me to do my part in making that happen. And please help me to love my enemies and let go of my fear and hate.

In Jesus’s name I pray,

Amen

 
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Posted by on September 6, 2020 in Miscellaneous, Musings and Stories

 

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Masculinity vs. Maturity

The Holy Post Podcast, “Episode 419” (1:03:20 mark)

Skye Jethani: I’m thinking back to years ago. I was being interviewed on a Christian radio program. It went to a commercial break and during the break the host said, “Hey, when we come back I’m just going to throw some questions at you. I’d love to hear your response to them.” And I’m like, “Okay, sure.” So we come back from break and he starts talking about how effeminate Christian men have become, and how ineffective they have become and how we’re sitting around all the time just on the sofa watching TV. And we’re not leading and we’re not guiding our churches…So I’m listening to this for awhile as he’s monologuing and I’m going, how on earth am I going to respond to this? And he was putting all of the blame on feminism. And so finally he turned to me and said, “Well, what do you think about all of that?” And I tried to not completely blast him, but my interpretation was he’s attributing those negative qualities to femininity, and I said, “I don’t think it’s that men are behaving like women. I think it’s that these men are behaving like boys. That this is about immaturity, not masculinity.” And that kind of blew his mind. He had never heard that before. Because in his mental framework, there’s masculinity and femininity and that’s the spectrum. And if men aren’t behaving the way men should behave it’s because it’s because they are behaving like women. And I was saying, “No, I think it’s that men aren’t behaving the way they are supposed to behave because they’re behaving like boys. They’re immature. That axis did not exist in his conceptual framework.

Dear God, I heard this yesterday and it really gave me something to think about. Maturity vs. masculinity. In another part of this conversation they were talking about how exhibiting the fruits of the spirit can possibly come across as not being very masculine. In fact, if you express love, joy, peace, patience, gentleness, faithfulness, kindness, goodness, and self control all of the time then it can come across as feminine and parts of our Christian culture can tend to look down on men who always exhibit those virtues.

First, let me interrupt this prayer by pointing out to you something you already know–it must be so amusing to you to see us all struggle to wrap our human minds around life and existence. We learn. We grow. We mature. And we try so hard. How often we must just look so foolish to you.

But back to my thoughts on this. When we first moved here there was a pastor at one of our town’s larger churches who was having difficulty with some of the parishioners. There was a faction within the church that I considered to be Unitarian that was trying to influence the theology taught, at a minimum, in their Sunday school class, and, at a maximum, within the entire church. As they positioned themselves against this pastor, who was trying to put an end their liberal, unChristian teaching, one of the criticisms made against him was that he wasn’t very masculine. And he was not a macho guy, but he was very masculine. He dressed nicely and wore suspenders. He didn’t care for sports. But if you decide to not care if he liked sports dressing in a more macho way, you saw a sensitive man who was compassionate and caring.

Ironically, the next pastor who replaced him was the opposite (by design). He was much more macho. Of course, the complaint about him was that he wasn’t empathetic or compassionate enough. He was insensitive. Don’t it always seem to go that you don’t know what you’ve got till it’s gone?

Going back to this quote from Skye Jethani, what does a mature Christian man look like? What does it mean to grow up and no longer be a boy? Again, ironically, as I sit and think about it, to be a mature Christian man means to exhibit those fruits of the Spirit and put them into action. It means to wake up in the morning loving you with all of my heart, soul, and strength and then loving my neighbor as myself. It means being a good neighbor. It means working hard and being responsible and a good steward of the things you’ve given us. It means seeking out the place in the world that you have for us.

Father, help me to let go of the paradigms the world finds important and to embrace your truth. Help me to internalize that truth more and more each day so that I might find myself just living it naturally as I commune with you. Thank you for blessing the fruit of my work. Thank you for guiding me through various situations. And while I’m here, I am thinking of a couple of recent tragedies friends are experiencing. Please help them to find you through this. Make all of this pain count. There is some terrible emotional and physical pain going on. Please make it count and show me the role you have for me to play in their lives.

In Jesus’s name I pray,

Amen

 

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What would Jesus say to this?

Dear God, I was having a texting conversation with a friend last night. He is someone I met on a vacation over three years ago, and we have kept in touch through Facebook.

Anyway, we were talking last night and he wanted to know what Jesus would have to say about a lot of the wrongs happening in the world. In this particular case, the thing on his mind was corruption he witnessed firsthand at a food distribution for the the poor. He saw volunteers taking food before the needy were able to go through the line, and it disgusted him. He finally walked away.

So what would Jesus have to say about all of this? My reply to him was to listen to Andy Stanley’s sermon from last Sunday called, “Not it it to win it.” This man isn’t a Christian so I know it was a tall ask. He’s very likely not going to listen to Andy’s sermon, but I’ve listened to it three times this week, and I plan to sit with it and pray through it over the weekend.

The big thing I think Jesus would do right now is rebuke the church. Andy told the story from Luke 9:51-56. Jesus was wanting to stay in Samaria, but the Samaritans didn’t want him and his entourage there. James and John then asked if Jesus wanted them to call down fire from heaven to destroy the Samaritans. Jesus’s response was to rebuke them and press on towards his crucifixion in Jerusalem.

Why do I think Jesus would rebuke the church right now? Because Andy is right. The church has fallen into the worldly trap of wanting to win. We want to win the battle for influence and power. We want the world the yield to our way of thinking. We want to exercise political power and defend it when it starts to slip away. We want our morality to be legislated throughout the earth, and to do that we need more power. To get that power, we need politicians who will do our bidding, whether we believe they are Christians or not. If they say they will support our morality then that’s all we need to know. In chess terminology, if they will give us their queen, they can have most of our chess pieces. Then the world will be the place we want it to me…Oh, I mean you want it to be (sarcasm implied).

What would be included in Jesus’s rebuke? Frankly, I shudder to think of what he might have to say to his church. What he would have to say to me. But I’m pretty sure he would start with something close to the parables he taught about the kingdom of heaven. The kingdom of heaven is something that starts from the bottom and grows from a grassroots level through love, the receiving of your grace, and then the sharing of your grace with others. There are moral standards in there to be sure. There is a need for asking for forgiveness of you. But these are what we need to do to be free. The kingdom of heaven is also like people who don’t care about their own rights and delight in the progress of others (see the parable of the workers hired at different times of day, but all were paid the same amount). And the kingdom of heaven is like the man who found it and sold everything he had to attain it because it was worth more than all he held on to.

Father, I’m about to go and do a prayer walk around one of our school district’s campuses that includes the high school, the primary school, and the district’s administrative building. Put my head into the right place as I do this. And better prepare me to answer the question, “What would Jesus have to say to this?” I want to always be about pointing others to you. Oh, and forgive me. Forgive us as the church. Help us to turn loose of our quest for power and influence so that our morality might be forced upon people. Help us to turn loose of that idol. Help us to turn loose of the idol of the Supreme Court, the President, the Congress, and any other person we think will do our work for us. Help us to do the work you put in front of us for your glory’s sake and not our own.

In Jesus’s name I pray,

Amen

 

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“No Words”

“No Words”

Those are the first two words of my favorite Sara Bareilles song, “Uncharted.” No words.

My wife has a friend who has a terminal cancer diagnosis. What does one say to that friend? Are there no words? Or do I just not have them? I too have a friend who has what will ultimately be terminal cancer. I don’t know how long he has to live and I don’t know what his path is like. Does God have words for him that I am supposed to deliver, or does he just offer me?

There is a ministry in some churches called Stephen’s Ministry. These ministers are trained to just be with people through their situation. To sit. To be present. To love. Not to fix. Not to solve. Just to be a physical presence on God’s behalf, sharing life.

One of the tragic things we can do in a difficult situation is force the words. More often than not, when we try too hard to say just the right thing, it ends up being exactly the wrong thing. When we had our miscarriage 25 years ago today, some well-meaning people told us that it was God’s will or that something must have been wrong and there was a reason. Oh, just be quiet and sit with us in our pain. Just be present. Allow there to be no words.

“No Words”

I won’t try to speak
I’ll simply be here for you
You won’t be alone

 

Disney Princess Theology

Dear God, I was listening to a podcast tonight and they discussed this quote from Erna Kim Hackett. It’s from a blog post she wrote in August 2017. Yeah, I guess I’m guilty of this for sure. I especially like the analogy she made of our country seeing ourselves as Israel when it is likely we have more Egypt in us that we think.

But I’m not going to cast stones at my fellow Americans right now. I want to look at myself first and see how I might have missed this simple truth in all of these prayer journals I’ve done with you. When I did David and Goliath, did I ever consider that I am Goliath in the story? That any part of me is Goliath? How about the New Testament Saul before he became Paul? The Pharisees? Am I a Pharisee? Is there any part of me that is the men Sodom? But have I ever looked in my heart to see if I’m Judas?

I can say that when I did the parents of the Bible series, I found myself sympathizing with Hagar and Peninnah in ways I hadn’t before. But that wasn’t me identifying with them as much as me maybe cutting them a break. But am I willing to ask myself if there is a part of me that is Pharaoh when he is stubborn and refuses to let the Israelites go because it will cost him and his dominant class too much? If I had been born to slave owners 200 years ago, would I have been willing to part with a good portion of my inherited wealth and free my slaves? What do I not do now because I am afraid it will impact my income?

Oh, Father, these questions are almost too painful to consider. I know there is so much sin in my life of which I am not aware. Thank you for loving me anyway. Thank you for not expecting me to get all of this figured out and resolved before I am able to come and commune with you. Thank you that there is grace for me to be who I am, but also a Holy Spirit to guide me into who you are calling me to be. Even on a night like this, I am humbled, repentant, but also at peace before you. Teach me to be better.

In Jesus’s name I pray,

Amen

 
 

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