It happened many years ago The memories still haunt you though And who’s to blame, you really don’t know You’re just locked all alone in these chains
Some times it’s hard to live at all The pictures of your history call Your mind’s a decorated wall But the Lord has the cure for your pain
It’s time, come back to the land of the living Come home to the land of the forgiving Jesus will be faithful to the end
It’s time, break the tangled webs that bind you Let the grace of God unwind you Give the Lord your broken heart to mend It’s time, it’s time
You’ve had your little victories But perfection’s pretty hard to please And guilt is an annoying breeze That blows all that’s peaceful away
And life is too short to go on living like this Or to brood over who’s done you wrong If the years pass you by, look at all that you’ll miss You’ve been walking in shadows too long
It’s time, come back to the land of the living Come home to the land of the forgiving Jesus will be faithful to the end
Written by Wayne Watson
Dear God, there are a lot of people who need the message of this song. I still remember getting this CD when is came out in 1992. It was a new song on his greatest hits album, “How Time Flies.” I also remember playing it for a friend with a difficult past. Yesterday morning, after not having heard or thought of it for literally a couple of decades, for some reason it came to mind. I played it while I was getting ready for work and it always amazes me how lyrics come back to me instantly. You have done something unbelievable in our minds when it comes to music.
So this morning, I sing this song for myself. I sing it for those I love. I sing it for the people in the meeting yesterday who showed up angry. A lot of the pain that controls us does so because we keep it a secret. So I pray that you would destroy the power of their/our secrets by safely exposing them to someone trustworthy in each of our lives. Expose and remove our shame. Along with the exposure, replace the shame, guilt, anger, depression, fear, sadness, etc. with the fruits of your Holy Spirit. Father, it’s time. Help us, please.
Dear God, we’ve learned nothing. I’ve learned nothing. Okay, I’ve learned a little, but just a little. I still grumble. I still complain. I’m so sorry.
But lest I skip the clever lyrics to this song, here they are:
“So You Wanna Go Back to Egypt”
So you wanna go back to Egypt Where it’s warm and secure Are sorry you bought the one way ticket When you thought you were sure You wanted to live in the land of promise But now it’s getting so hard Are you sorry you’re out here in the desert Instead of your own back yard
Eating leaks and onions by the Nile Ooh what breath for dining out in style Ooh, my life’s on the skids Building the pyramids
Well there’s nothing do but travel And we sure travel a lot ‘Cause it’s hard to keep your feet from moving When the sand gets so hot And in the morning it’s manna hotcakes We snack on manna all day And we sure had a winner last night for dinner Flaming manna souffle
Well we once complained for something new to munch The ground opened up and had some of us for lunch Ooh, such fire and smoke Can’t God even take a joke? Huh? NO!
So you wanna to back to Egypt Where your friends wait for you You can throw a big party and tell the whole gang Of what they said was all true And this Moses acts like a big shot Who does he think he is? Well it’s true that God works lots of miracles But Moses thinks they’re all his
Oh we’re having so much trouble even now Why’d he get so mad about that c-c-c-cow (that golded calf) Moses seems rather idle He just sits around, he just sits around and writes the Bible!
Oh, Moses, put down your pen! What? Oh no, manna again?
Oh, manna waffles Manna burgers Manna bagels Fillet of manna Manna patty BaManna bread!
By Keith & Melody Green
Oh how I used to look down on the Israelites in the Old Testament. What was their problem? Why did they keep disobeying you? Couldn’t they see everything you had done for them? The miracles? Why did they lose their faith? Then I got old enough to recognize the exact same patterns in myself. I am certainly no better. In fact, maybe I’m worse. They were one of hundreds of thousands of Israelites. I am just one of millions of Christians, but at least I have a Bible to teach me. All they had was Moses and the edicts you gave through him.
It’s interesting how Keith and Melody Green capture the Moses resentment in this song. I was looking at Numbers 12 yesterday and reminded of how Miriam and Aaron rebelled against Moses and started by criticizing the wife he chose–presumably Zipporah. But I think there were probably other resentments too. Kind of a “Who made you the boss of me?” situation.
I don’t know where I’m going with all of this except to say that there are certainly things in my life that do not please me right now. There are aspects that I’m unhappy with. However, I feel like you are slowly growing me and stretching me to the point where I am trusting you more and more. I believe you have a destination in mind for me and those I love. I believe it will be good and part of your plan. I just don’t know the road that leads there. I might not survive until they have completed it. I might never know how it happened. That’s okay. I trust you.
I’m going to close with the chorus of a Twila Paris song called “Do I Trust You:” Do I trust you, Lord? Does the river flow? Do I trust you, Lord? Does the north wind blow? You can see my heart. You can read my mind. And you’ve got to know I would rather die than to lose my faith in the one I love. Do I trust you, Lord? Do I trust you?” Yes, Father, I trust you. Help my distrust. I believe. Help my unbelief.
Dear God, this is a special song. I’ve used it in a prayer before and I’m using it again now. While this is a fable that includes false gods, the analogy I’ve used for people I love is pretty apt. I’ve seen people get so wrapped up in self-pity, shame, secrets, hate, revenge, etc. that it causes them to act out in terrible ways. But I know there is someone else inside of them. Someone you know. Someone you created in your image. Someone who can love, forgive, encourage, and serve.
When I see Moana place Te Fiti’s heart back in her it reminds me of you replacing our cold hearts with your love and mercy. Wiping away our shame and enabling us to simply both receive and give love again. Sometimes someone comes along and damages us–takes away our innocence. Sometimes we stray and do it ourselves. Either way, we are left with a lot of damage that only you can heal.
I have crossed the horizon to find you/ I know your name / They have stolen the heart from inside you / But this does not define you / This is not who you are / You know who you are
Father, you know my prayers. You know my heart. You know who is on my heart. Let your love flow. Let your mercy be embraced. Let secrets and shame be broken and freedom in you permeate every inch of our lives. For your glory. Do it for your glory. We’ve experienced pain. Make it count. Don’t let it be wasted, but let it be part of your master plan to have your kingdom come and your will be done on earth as it is in heaven.
Messiah, HWV 56: Part II, no. 44. Chorus: “Hallelujah” Composition by George Frideric Handel
Hallelujah! Hallelujah! Hallelujah! Hallelujah! Hallelujah! Hallelujah! Hallelujah! Hallelujah! Hallelujah! Hallelujah! For the Lord God Omnipotent reigneth Hallelujah! Hallelujah! Hallelujah! Hallelujah! For the Lord God omnipotent reigneth Hallelujah! Hallelujah! Hallelujah! Hallelujah! Hallelujah! Hallelujah! Hallelujah! Hallelujah! Hallelujah! Hallelujah! Hallelujah! Hallelujah! Hallelujah! Hallelujah! Hallelujah! Hallelujah! Hallelujah! Hallelujah! Hallelujah! The kingdom of this world Is become the kingdom of our Lord And of His Christ, and of His Christ And He shall reign for ever and ever And He shall reign for ever and ever And He shall reign for ever and ever For ever and ever, forever and ever King of kings (Forever and ever Hallelujah! Hallelujah!) And Lord of lords (Forever and ever Hallelujah! Hallelujah!) King of kings (Forever and ever Hallelujah! Hallelujah!) And Lord of lords (Forever and ever Hallelujah! Hallelujah!) King of kings (Forever and ever Hallelujah! Hallelujah!) And Lord of lords (King of kings and Lord of lords) And He shall reign And He shall reign And He shall reign forever and ever King of kings (Forever and ever) And He shall reign (Hallelujah! Hallelujah!) And He shall reign forever and ever King of kings! and Lord of lords! King of kings! and Lord of lords! And He shall reign forever and ever Forever and ever Forever and ever Hallelujah! Hallelujah! Hallelujah! Hallelujah! Hallelujah!
Dear God, I attended a performance of the Messiah yesterday with my wife in the choir. It was terrific. But, of course, I was struck by this song from the end of the piece. Nearly everyone knows it. The words are simple but beautifully worshipful. The arrangement of instruments and voices is unsurpassed. For the best, most worshipful (there’s that word again) funeral I’ve ever attended, they combined two church choirs to perform this at the church md as the recessional. Outstanding!
Like King George in the 1740s when he first heard it, I was moved yet again yesterday—even to tears. My overwhelming thought? I am so grateful you are so loving. You don’t have to be good. You don’t have to forgive me. You don’t have to care about me as an individual or the things I care about. You don’t have to take the time to mold me into a better man. You don’t have to engage in my life or even the world. But you do.
The omnipotent God reigns—HALLELUJAH!
The kingdom of the world has become your kingdom and of Jesus—HALLELUJAH!
You will reign forever and ever—HALLELUJAH!
You are king of all kings—HALLELUJAH!
You are Lord of all lords—HALLELUJAH!
Father, I sit here this morning simply grateful. Thank you. Thank you for Christmas!
O Holy night! The stars are brightly shining It is the night of our dear Savior’s birth Long lay the world in sin and error pining ‘Til He appears and the soul felt its worth A thrill of hope the weary world rejoices For yonder breaks a new and glorious morn Fall on your knees; O hear the Angel voices! O night divine, O night when Christ was born O night, O Holy night, O night divine!
Dear God, I was listening to this Christmas hymn yesterday and the part about Jesus appearing and our soul knowing it’s worth is struck me. It all gets wrapped up in this hope of Christmas that I’ll be speaking about next week at our town’s church-to-church Christmas service. Without you, we have zero idea about our worth.
I read an article this morning about declining teen mental health in our country—the world, really. Especially developed countries. Our technology is leading us into this toxic environment of engagement through social media. Interaction by remote.
So what is our worth? Without you, without understanding how you see us, it’s just a vapor. That’s our worth. But you created us. You know us. You love us. You need us. We have our worth in you, and we didn’t realize how much we were worth until you came and did what you did through the birth, life, death, and resurrection of Jesus.
Father, thank you for making my soul worth something. Thank you for showing me my worth through Jesus. Help me to know how to share it with others—especially youth and young adults.
I’ve got a witness not too stable It wouldn’t get me very far I’ve got one hand on the table And one in the cookie jar I’ve got sins that need eviction From a temple that’s a wreck I’ve got a chain of contradiction Hanging around my neck So I go down, I go down, down I go down on my knees
I feel the bitter winds grow colder They are dancing with my pride I’ve got a chip on my shoulder Bigger than a mountainside And these claws of human nature Hold me tight within their clasp I’m not worthy of forgiveness But I just had to ask So I go down, I go down, down I go down on my knees
Feed my hunger – slake my thirst For a spiritual rebirth Light my darkness Move in me Make me more than what you see As I go down on my knees
When I’ve all but killed the fire And my soul’s in desperate need But I wallow in the mire of complacency That’s when I go down on my knees I want to taste the fruit I’m missing And yet I feast only on the bread My desire’s alive and kicking But my drive is dead So I go down on my knees
Feed my hunger – slake my thirst For a spiritual rebirth Light my darkness Move in me Make me more than what you see As I go down on my knees
You bear the weight of condemnation Cleansing with the blood of truth So with my humble acclamation I want to give myself to you So I go down, I go down, down I go down on my knees I go down, I go down, yea I go down on my knees I go down, I go down, down I go down on my knees
Dear God, I think Wayne Kirkpatrick is an underrated songwriter. I remember when this album coming out 30 years ago and noticing that he wrote a lot of the songs. The lyrics are great and obviously written by someone who knows what working out their faith with fear and trembling through the trials of life is like. I put Ashton’s first two albums on yesterday while I worked out and was brought back to some really great songs from my past. So I thought I would start today with her first single that shot up the charts of Christian music, “Down on my Knees.”
To look at the lyrics of this song, it’s all about the internal (and outward) hypocrisy and struggle against our nature that we experience as Christians. The first verse just exemplifies Paul’s words in Romans 7 when he talks about struggling with sin. In verse 15 he says, “I don’t really understand myself, for I want to do what is right, but I don’t do it. Instead, I do what I hate.” I think anyone who has submitted themselves to discipleship and following you has felt these internal emotions. Kirkpatrick definitely has, and Ashton did a great job articulating it:
I’ve got one had on the table and one in the cookie jar.
I’ve got sins that need eviction from a temple that’s a wreck
I’ve got a chain of contradiction hanging around my neck
These claws of human nature hold me tight within their clasp
I’ve all but killed the fire and my soul’s in desperate need, but I wallow in the mire of complacency
I want to taste the fruit I’m missing, but I feast only on the bread
My desire’s alive and kicking, but my drive is dead
So what do I do with all of this? That’s when I come here in prayer to you. That’s when I go down on my knees and humbly repent and ask you to:
Feed my hunger
Slake my thirst
Light my darkness
Move in me
Make me more than what you see
And when I do that, here’s what you do:
You bear the weight of condemnation
[Cleanse me] with the blood of truth
Father, sometimes this life in you is just about slogging away each day–each moment. Slogging against my lethargy and self-indulgence. Seeking your forgiveness and your strength. Asking you to move through me in to the world in ways that I’m not capable of on my own, yet they will help you to enter the world and let your kingdom come and will be done on earth as it is in heaven. So, please give me this day my daily bread. And forgive me as I forgive others. Help me be strong against temptation. Deliver me from Satan’s plans. For the kingdom, power, and glory are yours, now and forever.
I set out on a narrow way many years ago Hoping I would find true love along the broken road But I got lost a time or two Wiped my brow and kept pushing through I couldn’t see how every sign pointed straight to you
That every long lost dream led me to where you are Others who broke my heart, they were like Northern stars Pointing me on my way into your loving arms This much I know is true That God blessed the broken road That led me straight to you Yes, He did
I think about the years I spent just passin’ through I’d like to have the time I lost and give it back to you But you just smile and take my hand You’ve been there, you understand It’s all part of a grander plan that is coming true
Every long lost dream led me to where you are Others who broke my heart, they were like Northern stars Pointing me on my way into your loving arms This much I know is true That God blessed the broken road That led me straight to you Yeah
And now I’m just a-rollin’ home Into my lover’s arms This much I know is true That God blessed the broken road That led me straight to you
That God blessed the broken road That led me straight to you Ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, mm, mm
Songwriters: Marcus Hummon / Jeff Hanna / Bobby Boyd
Dear God, this is a love song, but I think it has a great message from a macro level. We all have broken roads in our lives. I’ve certainly had things that didn’t turn out the way I wanted. When I’m in the midst of the valley this is the concept I put my faith in: sometimes this is the only path that leads to where you need me to be.
I’ve mentioned in these prayers before the time I told a friend about some of my frustrations and he said, “It’s hard when we are disappointed with God.” It was the struggle through that concept of being disappointed with you that brought me to a reality that I didn’t truly trust you. I still had a baseline of expectation that I expected you to meet. I was willing to accept some potholes in the road, but I wasn’t ready to deal with mudslides that collapsed the road out from under me. But I’ve walked and traversed the broken road long enough now to at least come to some level of peace about accepting my circumstances and then seeking your direction as to how I should respond. I’m still sad. I still mourn loss. I’m not “okay,” but that’s okay. That’s part of my formation too.
Father, every long lost dream leads me to where you are. So take my dreams and be glorified through my life and the lives of those most precious to me, regardless of what it costs me.
I’m gonna make a change For once in my life It’s gonna feel real good Gonna make a difference Gonna make it right
As I, turn up the collar on My favorite winter coat This wind is blowing my mind
I see the kids in the streets With not enough to eat Who am I to be blind? Pretending not to see their needs
A summer disregard, a broken bottle top And a one man soul They follow each other on the wind ya’ know ‘Cause they got nowhere to go That’s why I want you to know
I’m starting with the man in the mirror I’m asking him to change his ways And no message could have been any clearer If you want to make the world a better place Take a look at yourself, and then make a change Na-na-na, na-na-na Na-na, na-na
I’ve been a victim of a selfish kind of love It’s time that I realize That there are some with no home, not a nickel to loan Could it be really me, pretending that they’re not alone?
A willow deeply scarred, somebody’s broken heart And a washed-out dream They follow the pattern of the wind ya’ see ‘Cause they got no place to be That’s why I’m starting with me
I’m starting with the man in the mirror I’m asking him to change his ways And no message could have been any clearer If you want to make the world a better place Take a look at yourself, and then make a change
I’m starting with the man in the mirror I’m asking him to change his ways And no message could’ve been any clearer If you want to make the world a better place Take a look at yourself and then make that Change!
I’m starting with the man in the mirror (Oh yeah!) I’m asking him to change his ways (Better change!) No message could’ve been any clearer
If you want to make the world a better place Take a look at yourself and then make the change You gotta get it right, while you got the time You can’t close your, your mind!
That man, that man (With the man in the mirror) That man, that man (Oh, yeah!) That man, that man (I’m asking him to change his ways) That man (Better change!)
No message could have been any clearer If you want to make the world a better place Take a look at yourself and then make the change
Na-na-na, na-na-na Na-na, na-na Gonna feel real good Na-na-na, na-na-na Na-na, na-na
I’m gonna make a change It’s gonna feel real good! Chime on! (Change)
Just lift yourself You know You’ve got to stop it Yourself!
I’ve got to make that change, today! Hoo! (Man in the mirror)
You got to You got to not let yourself Brother Hoo!
You know, I’ve got to get That man, that man (Man in the mirror)
You’ve got to move! Chime on! Chime on! You got to
Stand up! Stand up! Stand up! (Yeah! Make that change) Stand up and lift yourself, now! (Man in the mirror)
You know it! You know it! You know it! You know it!
Dear God, I watched an interview on Saturday with Siedah Garrett, the woman who wrote the lyrics of this song. It was inspirational and good-hearted. I enjoyed hearing how she wrote the song, and how Michael Jackson ended up deciding to record it. And it’s a good song. A really good song.
So I’ve sat with it for the last couple of days. I’ve decided that it’s great, but it’s definitely missing something. It’s missing you. It’s missing your love. It’s missing your broken heart and your Spirit motivating us. It’s missing the first step, which is our repentance. It’s missing the part where I ask you what you want me to do, and then I seek your provision as I move through it. It’s missing the possibility that I might have to be inconvenienced to do the work–well, maybe that part is in there.
I heard someone say one time that the church, your body, is your Plan A, and you don’t have a Plan B. Why is there suffering in the world? Well, as we talked about a few days ago from that interview I quoted about pain, it’s not for me to ask why. My job is to ask how you want me to respond to it.
I confess that I still limit my exposure. I still have some nicely drawn walls around my life. They might be a little, or a lot, wider than they were 20 years ago, but they are certainly still there.
Father, it doesn’t start with the man in the mirror. It starts with you. It starts with repenting for caring more about myself than I do you, your kingdom, or others. Then it moves to asking you to guide me into your work. Asking you to lay issues on my heart. Asking you to move me beyond my comfort zone, to give out of my need, and leave it all on the field. I’m sorry for not doing that. I’m sorry for not loving you with all of my heart, soul, and strength. I’m sorry for not loving my neighbor as myself. Help me to fulfill all of your law by simply doing those things.
[English Translation of “Ode to Joy” by Ludwig van Beethoven]
Oh friends, no more of these sounds! Let us sing more cheerful songs, More full of joy! Joy, bright spark of divinity, Daughter of Elysium, Fire-inspired we tread Thy sanctuary! Thy magic power reunites All that custom has divided; All men become brothers Under the sway of thy gentle wings. Whoever has created An abiding friendship, Or has won A true and loving wife, All who can call at least one soul theirs, Join in our song of praise! But any who cannot must creep tearfully Away from our circle. All creatures drink of joy At nature’s breast. Just and unjust Alike taste of her gift; She gave us kisses and the fruit of the vine, A tried friend to the end. Even the worm can feel contentment, And the cherub stands before God! Gladly, like the heavenly bodies Which He set on their courses through the splendor of the firmament; Thus, brothers, you should run your race, As a hero going to conquest. You millions, I embrace you. This kiss is for all the world! Brothers, above the starry canopy There must dwell a loving Father. Do you fall in worship, you millions? World, do you know your Creator? Seek Him in the heavens! Above the stars must He dwell.
Dear God, this song is so special to me. I’m pretty sure I’ve journaled on this version of the “Ode to Joy” before, but I came across it again a couple of nights ago and it so blessed me I needed to do it again.
What did this do for me? It brought me into worship when nothing else could. I had prayed. I listened to some Christian music that is meaningful to me. Nothing was helping. I was in a glum funk, and I couldn’t pull out of it. Then, for whatever reason (I’ll say it was the Holy Spirit), I was reminded of this video and I put it on. I literally had full-body chills and tears running down both cheeks. I was watching these people play and sing this song, and I joined in their chorus. My wife suggested it was a spiritual warfare situation, and somehow the Holy Spirit used this to break a spirit that was attacking me. Frankly, that’s exactly what it felt like. It literally felt like something broke.
Father, there is nothing like simply worshipping you. You are great. You are the source of love, joy, peace, etc. To be in your presence and joined by all of those who worship you is an amazing feeling. I guess that’s one of my favorite parts of this video. Not only do the players and singers gradually join the happy chorus, but the unsuspecting crowd joins as well. Everyone joined in some form of worship. Maybe some of them weren’t REALLY worshipping you, but many of them were. I certainly was as I watched it. Thank you for rescuing me not only from hell and a life and death spent apart from you, but for rescuing me a couple of nights ago. I needed you and I still need you.
Looking back on the memory of
The dance we shared ‘neath the stars above
For a moment all the world was right
How could I have known that you’d ever say goodbye
And now I’m glad I didn’t know
The way it all would end, the way it all would go
Our lives are better left to chance
I could have missed the pain
But I’d have had to miss the dance
Holding you, I held everything
For a moment wasn’t I the king
If I’d only known how the king would fall
Hey, who’s to say, you know I might have changed it all
And now I’m glad I didn’t know
The way it all would end, the way it all would go
Our lives are better left to chance
I could have missed the pain
But I’d have had to miss the dance
If our lives are better left to chance
Oh, our lives are better left to chance
Oh, our lives are better left to chance
I could have missed the pain
But I’d have had to miss the dance
Source: Musixmatch
Dear God, I was listening to this song yesterday and thinking about the introduction Garth Brooks gives it in the official music video. The first verse obviously sets the context as being about a romantic relationship, but he explains in that he also likes to think of it as being about living our lives in general and the choices we make to try to do the right things. Sometimes it ends in pain, but the pain or even tragedy is part of the journey and story as well.
Now, I know that not everyone even has the “dance” in their lives. The really joyous good times. I know that some have known nothing but pain their entire lives. But I can claim no such thing. I have had some remarkably wonderful times. There are times I still remember from childhood that were amazing. I’ve known my wife nearly my entire adult life, and we have done remarkable things together as well. When we got married, we had no idea some of the pain that awaited us. I could enumerate the pain we’ve experienced over the last 32 years of knowing each other, but you know it all better than I do. My life, comparatively, hasn’t been tragic my any stretch of the imagination. I’ve had pain to be sure. And there are some specific aspects of my current life that are extremely painful. Frankly, I’m not sure if they will ever be resolved. I’ve done what I can to resolve them, but their future is in the hands of others. So I’ve resigned myself to love them through letting them go and accept the pain as part of that love.
But coming back to this song, there is a lot of brilliance in it. I’m glad I didn’t know 20 or 30 years ago that I’d be exactly where I am now. There is so much wisdom in you keeping me on a need-to-know basis. It’s 8:32 in the morning as I type this right now. I don’t even know what 8:33 will bring. That’s okay. That’s good. If I will just stay in the moment and not worry about the next one then I can fully enjoy the good you are bringing me, absorb the pain, and commune with you.
On this vacation, the vision I keep having is from the 23rd Psalm. This two-week break is a luxury. You are leading me to green pastures and still waters. You are restoring my soul. There will be other times when I will experience the valley of the shadow of death. There will be times when I will be before my enemies. But right now, in this moment, you are restoring my soul. Thank you.
Father, I told you several months ago that I was having dinner with some old friends, and as we shared our lives with each other I thought of the metaphor of each of us having a representational bucket that contained the circumstances of our lives. All of the good and all of the bad. I came to the conclusion at that dinner that if I had the option to put my bucket in the middle of the table along with theirs and then we were each able to choose someone else’s bucket, I would, without a doubt, take my own. Everyone there would probably do the same. Why? As I sit here this morning, I think it is because, regardless of the pain in that bucket, it also contains all of those good and precious memories and moments of which I could not bear to let go. I have more than I deserve. I am grateful for the good and the bad. I embrace the life you’ve given me. Help me to, even in the hard times, worship you as the God who really loves me and can use my life in whatever way helps your kingdom to come to earth and your will to be done.
Emails to God 