6 Children, obey your parents because you belong to the Lord, for this is the right thing to do. ² “Honor your father and mother.” This is the first commandment with a promise: ³ If you honor your father and mother, “things will go well for you, and you will have a long life on the earth.”

⁴ Fathers, do not provoke your children to anger by the way you treat them. Rather, bring them up with the discipline and instruction that comes from the Lord.

⁵ Slaves, obey your earthly masters with deep respect and fear. Serve them sincerely as you would serve Christ. ⁶ Try to please them all the time, not just when they are watching you. As slaves of Christ, do the will of God with all your heart. ⁷ Work with enthusiasm, as though you were working for the Lord rather than for people. ⁸ Remember that the Lord will reward each one of us for the good we do, whether we are slaves or free.

⁹ Masters, treat your slaves in the same way. Don’t threaten them; remember, you both have the same Master in heaven, and he has no favorites.

Ephesians 6:1-9

Dear God, as a man with two grown children and also with both parents still living, this is one of those tricky passages because I want to read verses 1-4 as a parent and not as a child. But at this point in my life, I’m both. I have adult children who currently own me no fealty (verses 1-3). They technically don’t owe me love or attention. It’s totally up to them. At the same time, verse 4 is something that, as a father, I know I did at times when my children were younger and still at home. I know I did things that made them angry. Some of them I regret. Some of them I don’t. And there are some that I’m not aware of, but I know they fester. So it’s up to them to decide if they want to embrace this passage. The commandment in Exodus 20:12 and Deuteronomy 5:16 about honoring your parent is purely there now to give them guidance, but the choice is theirs.

Then I double back and read verses 1-3 as an adult child. My parents are aging. They need me. They need my siblings. Whatever they did to provoke us to anger–whatever mistakes they have made, both as a child and as an adult–are immaterial right now. They are my parents, and you have called me to love them and care for them. Paul’s words are for me. I owe my parents honor, and, at this stage in life, that means caregiving and love.

I included the slave verses here because they are pretty similar, and I have people who work for me who, while not slaves, I do need to make sure I’m treating well. I had a situation yesterday that got very hard at work. I tried to respond well. I’ll admit that my temper initially flared, but I was able to get it under control within a few seconds. I tried to treat them well. After a few minutes, I even remembered to pray that the Holy Spirit would help me. And the final outcome was, I think (hope) one that de-escalated and gave us some acceptable actionable items for the future.

Father, help me. Help me to be the man you need me to be. Help me to love well. Help me to worship well today. Help me to comfort the man whose wife’s funeral I’m attending today. Make me an instrument of your peace. With my coworkers, with my wife and children, and with my friends.

I pray this in Jesus and with your Holy Spirit,

Amen