14 Samson went down to Timnah, and at Timnah he saw one of the daughters of the Philistines. ² Then he came up and told his father and mother, “I saw one of the daughters of the Philistines at Timnah. Now get her for me as my wife.” ³ But his father and mother said to him, “Is there not a woman among the daughters of your relatives, or among all our people, that you must go to take a wife from the uncircumcised Philistines?” But Samson said to his father, “Get her for me, for she is right in my eyes.”

⁴ His father and mother did not know that it was from the Lord, for he was seeking an opportunity against the Philistines. At that time the Philistines ruled over Israel.

Judges 14:1-5

Dear God, it’s too bad we don’t get any stories from Samson’s childhood. He was born and now, all of a sudden, he’s ready to get married. He presumably has long hair and an unruly beard (I assume the razor rule applied to his facial hair too). And he is apparently pretty unruly when it comes to his personality too. Did it have to be this way for your plan to work. Manoah and his wife seem like legitimately sweet people. It feels like they were simply ill-equipped to handle their son’s personality.

Yet, this is who you chose to be Samson’s parents. I’ve no doubt they did their best with him. I am sure they felt extra pressure to be good parents given their two angel visits. I’m reminded of a guy my dad knew years ago who used to say that you chose our parents for us. They were who you wanted us to have. I’ll confess, I think about some children who are abused and question that sometimes. I know a boy right now who seems to have been set up for failure in life by the parents you chose for him. I want to go ahead and stop and pray right now that you will raise up people in his life who will guide him on the path you have for him. Draw him to yourself. Use this pain of his childhood to form him into the man you are calling him to be. Don’t let this pain be wasted. It’s too great to be wasted.

Of course, Father, as I sit here I can only think of my flaws as a father. How I let my children down. I did some good things to be sure. Some really good things. As I see them living good lives right now, I can see my wife in there. I can even see myself. But I also know I got a lot of things wrong. I’m sorry. I love you. I love them. Please use the pain all of us have experienced to be glorified in us and through us. Help us to all worship you well. Help us to love justice, seek mercy, and walk humbly with you. And I pray this for their significant others as well. They are our family too, and I wish I could do more to know and bless them.

Oh, you know what? I was about to wrap up, but this just made me think of something: daughters-in-law and sons-in-law. Ever since my children started dating, I’ve told people–and this is true–that what I really looked for in my kids as they were dating someone is whether or not I saw good fruit growing from them through the relationship or if I saw bad fruit. And there were definitely differences. It was always fun to see good fruit brought into their life through their relationship with another person. And it was discouraging and even heartbreaking to see bad fruit. I know that’s one of the things Samson’s parents were afraid of with this match with a Philistine woman. They wanted to see good fruit in Samson’s life, and how could that happen if he married a Philistine. I’m sure they had dreams of who he would be for Israel after the angel’s visit. How could this match lead to that? But as Judges 14:4 says, “⁴ His father and mother did not know that it was from the Lord, for he was seeking an opportunity against the Philistines. At that time the Philistines ruled over Israel.” Father, in the things that break my heart, help me to be at peace in the hope that you are seeking an opportunity through the circumstances that concern me.

I pray this in Jesus and with your Holy Spirit,

Amen