I was reading an article from the H.E.B. Foundation Magazine Echoes, and I came across a description of a summer retreat led by Adam Neder. The retreat was titled “Faith in the Ruins.” A description of the retreat in the promotional material for it sums it up: “…as challenges multiply, as the church perfects the art of discrediting itself, as friends leave the faith, many Christians are feeling exhausted, disoriented, and discouraged. Some wonder how much longer they can stick with Christianity–or even if they want to.”

That’s where the 10 observations by Neder came in. I looked at them and thought I would do a series of prayer journals on the 10 observations the article mentioned Neder covered during the retreat.

#7. Theological credibility is inseparable from credibility in other areas.

Dear God, theological credibility is an interesting thing because, frankly, I question my own theology a lot. I don’t trust it. I trust you more than I trust what I think about you or think I know about you. I’ve been listening to a podcast by a Catholic priest who is going through the Bible over the course of the year, reading it cover to cover, including the apocrypha. I agree with most of what he says, but there are times when I don’t. Does that mean he doesn’t have theological credibility with me? Or that I don’t have theological credibility with him? My point is, I think we need to be careful with out much dogma we attach to our own theology because, to a great extent, you and your ways are unknowable to us.

With that said, what gives me credibility with people? Honestly, I think it’s humility. I think it’s being willing to admit mistakes and/or failures. I knew a man who ended up in federal prison in his 20s and then state prison in his 40s. I remember talking to my son about him when my son was young and telling him that this man’s problem was that, when the chips were down, instead of just admitting failure, cutting bait and taking his lumps, he looked for shortcuts that could help him save face and survive. The irony is that the shortcuts ended up being crimes against others that landed him in a worse place than if he had just told the truth.

Credibility starts, I think, with just being genuine. No hidden agendas. No malice. No threats of withholding love, friendship or respect if you don’t agree with me. Come to think of it, I guess it starts with loving others as I love myself–maybe even more.

Father, Holy Spirit, I guess I’ll end with this–and maybe this is where Neder was coming from with his observation. Any credibility I have in sharing my faith in you ends as soon as hypocrisy enters the equation. I see news people do it all of the time–on both sides. I knew a man who was amazing at church, but when people from church would work for him in his business they were floored by how awful he was from Monday through Saturday. His personal conduct killed any theological credibility he might have had. So help me to guard against hypocrisy. Help me to not be a pit of vipers. Help me to love. Help me to offer empathy and patience. That doesn’t mean I should accept any behavior, but, well, help me to see with your eyes and then be your words and actions in this world. Help me to live what I actually believe and let my words reflect what I actually believe. And where my theology is wrong, please correct me.

I pray all of this through the power of you son, Jesus, through whom I am able to be here,

Amen