After Jesus left the synagogue with James and John, they went to Simon and Andrew’s home. Now Simon’s mother-in-law was sick in bed with a high fever. They told Jesus about her right away. So he went to her bedside, took her by the hand, and helped her sit up. Then the fever left her, and she prepared a meal for them. That evening after sunset, many sick and demon-possessed people were brought to Jesus. The whole town gathered at the door to watch. So Jesus healed many people who were sick with various diseases, and he cast out many demons. But because the demons knew who he was, he did not allow them to speak. Before daybreak the next morning, Jesus got up and went out to an isolated place to pray. Later Simon and the others went out to find him. When they found him, they said, “Everyone is looking for you.” But Jesus replied, “We must go on to other towns as well, and I will preach to them, too. That is why I came.” So he traveled throughout the region of Galilee, preaching in the synagogues and casting out demons.

Mark 1:29-39

Dear God, it seems like Jesus was always careful about lingering too long when the adoration became too much. Is that right? Let me think about that before I say that definitively. Is that what Jesus was doing as he went away to pray by himself?

I was thinking about this story in concert with the story about Jesus sending out the 72, and then, when they returned and told of their successes (your successes through them), he suggested they get away alone for a while. Of course, that was interrupted by the multitudes and he took one extra bit of compassion to teach them and eventually feed them, but he still got away by himself afterward. He still got away to pray.

I think Jesus knew that he had to walk a very fine line between being you and your essence, and keeping the humanness of himself submitted to you. In this story from Mark, it seems that Jesus got up early to go to “an isolated place to pray” because he knew he needed you. He knew he needed perspective. He simply could not do this without being completely connected to you.

I told my wife this morning that the crowd gathered at the door and that “everyone looking for [him]” the disciples referenced the next morning, reminds me of the people now who are looking for the COVID-19 vaccine. Some have received it and are thrilled. Others are looking for a place, any place, to get their shot. Frankly, my wife and I are among the lucky ones. Because of my work, I’m considered 1A and my wife’s arm happened to be in the right place at the right time when they had a few extra doses for a vial that needed to go somewhere or they would be wasted. And I remember the feeling I had when I saw her getting her shot. I was elated. I was grateful. I can only imagine how much more elated and grateful these people felt–to have run across the one man in the entire world who could heal their infirmities.

But Jesus apparently had something affirmed to him that morning in his prayer time with you. Healing was nice, fun, kind, and benevolent, but what he came to do was preach: “That is why I came.” So they left there. I am sure the people in the town were devastated. I would think the disciples’ families would have been upset, wondering why they couldn’t just keep Jesus in their home and to themselves. I’m sure some people started following him just to see if they could get access to him. Maybe a healing for themselves or a loved one. Later, the teaching will get hard and many will turn away. It’s not just fun and miracles anymore. They were going to be asked to stretch and grow. They were going to be asked to sacrifice.

Father, I am disheartened to see how similar I am to the disciples and the others. I want what is best for and benefits me. I like my luxuries and my toys. I like my home, my healthcare and benefits, and I want the same advantages for those I love as well. I don’t want to suffer or sacrifice. I do my best to avoid hurt and pain. So I am sorry. And when I do experience success, help me to remember that my first action should be to get by myself and pray to you instead of reveling in and marveling in the great things that you did through me. No, help me to always ask you, what am I doing here?

In Jesus’s name I pray,

Amen