On the way, Jesus told them, “Tonight all of you will desert me. For the Scriptures say, ‘God will strike the Shepherd, and the sheep of the flock will be scattered.’ But after I have been raised from the dead, I will go ahead of you to Galilee and meet you there.” Peter declared, “Even if everyone else deserts you, I will never desert you.” Jesus replied, “I tell you the truth, Peter—this very night, before the rooster crows, you will deny three times that you even know me.” “No!” Peter insisted. “Even if I have to die with you, I will never deny you!” And all the other disciples vowed the same.

Matthew 26:31-35

Dear God, I can appreciate Peter’s sentiment here. I want to believe the best about myself. I want to see myself as brave. In a world of church and school shootings, I’ve sat next to my wife in church and imagined what I would do if there was a shooter. I have to tell you, in my mind, I often come off as very brave, although it usually involves me dying in the process. But is that really what I would do.

I think I remember when I was growing up hearing people commonly say, “I’m willing to die for our freedoms.” But 9-11 changed that. When we all started to feel vulnerable of a mass scale we decided that it was okay to sacrifice some of our freedoms so that the government could do more to protect us. We gave them some of our privacy and in exchange we received some pretty good protections.

As for John and the other disciples, I wonder how many of them were ready to leave immediately. Hearing Jesus talk like this must have been difficult. It’s hard to be a coward while another one in your group is exhibiting so much bravery. But I’m sure at least a couple of them were saying, “Oh yeah, me too!” but inside they were thinking, “I think I have to go to the bathroom. I wonder if anyone will miss me if I don’t come back for awhile.

Father, there are a few lessons for me in this. One is of humility. I am not as strong as I think or hope I am. The other is leadership. Peters declarations, albeit hubristic, led those who were afraid to at least say the right thing. It was positive peer pressure. Well, I have that opportunity every day, not only in my work, but in my other relationships as well. So I guess my prayer is that you make me a humble and wise leader. And do it all for your glory.

In Jesus’ name I pray,

Amen