So Jesus said again, “I tell you the truth, unless you eat the flesh of the Son of Man and drink his blood, you cannot have eternal life within you. At this point many of his disciples turned away and deserted him. Then Jesus turned to the Twelve and asked, “Are you also going to leave?”

John 6:53,66-67

Dear God, I left our verses 54-65 because I wanted to link the subject to the verb, as it were. Jesus says some hard things here at the end of John 6, but it’s almost like he’s intentionally turning up the heat to clear off the chaff. The problem I have when I read this passage is that I’m pretty sure that, if I had come along with Jesus this far if I had been there at the time, I’m pretty sure this would have been the last straw for me. I would have been wrong, but I probably would have left.

With what was in Jesus’ future, I wonder if he was just really drilling down to see who would be with him post-resurrection after the real disillusionment of the crucifixion had happened. I recently read a book about special forces training in the army and what they put people through mentally, physically and emotionally. The trainee who made it all of the way through said (disclaimer, I don’t necessarily agree with this, but I think there’s some truth to it) that he used to think getting to the end and not quitting was about determination, but after going through it he decided that the people who didn’t make it were the ones who couldn’t make that final decision to not think for themselves and be completely subject to a superior’s orders. Those that made it, on the other hand, were willing to have individual thought completely purged from them and then have it rebuilt in the military’s image. Is that a little of what Jesus was doing here?

Father, this has always been a hard story for me. I know you loved the people who went away. I know you followed through with your plan for them as well as anyone else. But for the job at hand, perhaps you just didn’t need them. I wonder what happened to a lot of them. I guess, as for me, my hope is that you will forgive and allow for my failings.

In Jesus’ name I pray,

Amen