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Category Archives: Restore: A Guided Lent Journal for Prayer and Meditation

Luke 15:25-32

30 Mar

25 “Meanwhile, the older son was in the fields working. When he returned home, he heard music and dancing in the house, 26 and he asked one of the servants what was going on. 27 ‘Your brother is back,’ he was told, ‘and your father has killed the fattened calf. We are celebrating because of his safe return.’

28 “The older brother was angry and wouldn’t go in. His father came out and begged him, 29 but he replied, ‘All these years I’ve slaved for you and never once refused to do a single thing you told me to. And in all that time you never gave me even one young goat for a feast with my friends. 30 Yet when this son of yours comes back after squandering your money on prostitutes, you celebrate by killing the fattened calf!’

31 “His father said to him, ‘Look, dear son, you have always stayed by me, and everything I have is yours. 32 We had to celebrate this happy day. For your brother was dead and has come back to life! He was lost, but now he is found!’”

Luke 15:25-32

Dear God, I just had this thought while reading this passage this morning: I wonder what the angels think of us humans and your fascination with us. I mean, I know the least in heaven is greater than the greatest of us, so I think they are beyond the jealousy expressed by the older son in this story, and they likely share your affection for us since they get sent here to care for us.

I’m asking because it makes me think that perhaps we should adopt their apparent attitude towards us when we think about our fellow humans we think we are better than. The ones we don’t think deserve you. I think they probably see us as your loved, created beings, and we should all see each other that same way.

In Restore: A Guided Lent Journal for Prayer and Meditation, Sister Miriam focuses today on giving to others–alms giving. As she puts it in the last paragraph, “Giving alms frees us from narrow-mindedness, stinginess, and disordered attachment to things. It brings about the realization that we belong to each other. We need it. Oh, how we need it. It can often be penitential because it cuts us at our deepest level of selfishness and self-centeredness. The world is not all about us. The other serves as a constant reminder that we are made for communion and relationship.”

Father, I think they older brother in this story could have used a little more of a giving spirit. My wife and I try to discipline ourselves to give, but that will be wasted if we don’t also allow that giving to touch our hearts with compassion. There are people out there who frustrate me. And I confess that I look down upon them and judge them. I am judgmental and not curious. Help me to be more curious about them and to love them as your children, just as much as the angels love us.

I pray this in Jesus and with your Holy Spirit,

Amen

 
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Posted by on March 30, 2025 in Luke, Restore: A Guided Lent Journal for Prayer and Meditation

 

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Psalm 51

29 Mar

Psalm 51

For the choir director: A psalm of David, regarding the time Nathan the prophet came to him after David had committed adultery with Bathsheba.

1 Have mercy on me, O God,
    because of your unfailing love.
Because of your great compassion,
    blot out the stain of my sins.
2 Wash me clean from my guilt.
    Purify me from my sin.
3 For I recognize my rebellion;
    it haunts me day and night.
4 Against you, and you alone, have I sinned;
    I have done what is evil in your sight.
You will be proved right in what you say,
    and your judgment against me is just.
5 For I was born a sinner—
    yes, from the moment my mother conceived me.
6 But you desire honesty from the womb,
    teaching me wisdom even there.

7 Purify me from my sins, and I will be clean;
    wash me, and I will be whiter than snow.
8 Oh, give me back my joy again;
    you have broken me—
    now let me rejoice.
9 Don’t keep looking at my sins.
    Remove the stain of my guilt.
10 Create in me a clean heart, O God.
    Renew a loyal spirit within me.
11 Do not banish me from your presence,
    and don’t take your Holy Spirit from me.

12 Restore to me the joy of your salvation,
    and make me willing to obey you.
13 Then I will teach your ways to rebels,
    and they will return to you.
14 Forgive me for shedding blood, O God who saves;
    then I will joyfully sing of your forgiveness.
15 Unseal my lips, O Lord,
    that my mouth may praise you.

16 You do not desire a sacrifice, or I would offer one.
    You do not want a burnt offering.
17 The sacrifice you desire is a broken spirit.
    You will not reject a broken and repentant heart, O God.
18 Look with favor on Zion and help her;
    rebuild the walls of Jerusalem.
19 Then you will be pleased with sacrifices offered in the right spirit—
    with burnt offerings and whole burnt offerings.
    Then bulls will again be sacrificed on your altar.

Dear God, it’s so remarkable we have any of this. That David’s sin was known, recorded, and then maintained in a way that I would know about it today. That David was confronted and humiliated by Nathan. And then to not only know that he repented of his sin, but that his repentance, at least in part, is recorded in this psalm. He was not only broken, but he vulnerably shared his brokenness with the world at the time and the world for all time. They took this repentant psalm, labeled it for exactly what it was, and then gave it to the Israelites to use when they had their own repentance to do. Like I said, it’s remarkable.

I guess the two questions I have this morning are, 1.) how good am I at truly searching my heart and repenting and 2.) how willing am I to publicly repent and give others not only an example of a flawed fellow sojourner but also an example of what to do about it?

Scale of 1-10, I would say I’m about a 5 on searching my soul and heart, discerning the sin in my life, and then repenting. One thing I’ll say about the “reconciliation” (i.e., confession) in Catholicism is that it makes you think about it, name it, and then claim it out loud to another person. I don’t believe it is something that has to be done for absolution from you, but I can see the value in it. As for my “Baptist” way of doing it, it can awfully easy to take the light approach and just think of something, tell you I’m sorry about that, and then not think of it anymore.

Regarding sharing my sin with others, I would say it depends on the sin. If it’s something that I’m really ashamed of, I just keep those between you and me. But should I? Should I be more open about sharing all of me with others? For my sake as well as theirs.

Father, as I search my heart and soul this morning, I can feel the sin of self-pity that I’ve given a special space in my heart to occupy. I also feel the sin of selfishness and lethargy. The sin of unintentionality. I am too unintentional about some of my activities, and that leads to slothfulness. I’d love to say I’m just doing “Sabbath” when I’m being slothful, but that’s not really what I’m doing. I’m just being selfish. I will claim some victory over some temptations I’ve had recently that you enabled me to withstand. But there are others that I’ve jumped right into. Undue anger. Judgment of others. Slander. I am sorry. I am really sorry. Help me to be intentional today about Sabbath, worship, loving others, and the work you’ve given me to do, even in my rest.

I pray all of this in Jesus and with your Holy Spirit,

Amen

 
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Posted by on March 29, 2025 in Psalms, Restore: A Guided Lent Journal for Prayer and Meditation

 

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Collect for Mass of the Day – March 28, 2025

28 Mar

Pour your grace into our
Hearts, we pray, O Lord,
That we may be constantly
Drawn away from unruly
Desires
And obey by your own gift
The heavenly teaching
You give us.

Collect for Mass of the Day – March 28, 2025

Dear God, I decided to start with Sister Miriam’s reading from Restore: A Guided Lent Journal for Prayer and Meditation instead of just starting with the text presented and going off on my own from there. I liked this paragraph from her commentary today. When speaking of “unruly desires,” she said:

We commonly get stuck at the level of “disordered desire,” and as we mentioned earlier, we try to manage that desire or the sin without exploring with the Lord the deeper roots. Christianity is not about sin management or mere behavior modification but rather a complete transformation unto glory. Christ came to help us with these places and to heal our sin and division. He came to bring us into his own divine life.

I had a relative text me a couple of days ago about their 44th anniversary of sobriety from alcohol. I think he would say that his addiction and addressing it a process of addressing some of the things in his life or psyche that he was numbing with the alcohol.

So how do I numb myself from pain, insecurity, or fear? Do I lash out in anger towards others? Do I create noise around me that keeps my mind from being still and feeling the “feels” that are tormenting me? Honestly, these prayer times with you are some of the few moments of the day that I allow for quiet and self-reflection.

Father, yes, I have disordered desires. Help me to address them. It’s not just a matter of repenting for them. It’s also a matter of bringing them to Jesus with the Holy Spirit and seeking the healing he offers from the life he lived, the death he suffered, and then his resurrection. Now, he stands there ready to love on me, comfort me, and heal me. Holy Spirit, walk with me today and show me moment to moment how to experience this healing.

I pray this to the Father in Jesus and with the Holy Spirit,

Amen

 
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Posted by on March 28, 2025 in Restore: A Guided Lent Journal for Prayer and Meditation

 

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Entrance Antiphon for Mass of the Day – March 27, 2025

27 Mar

I am the salvation of the
People, says the Lord.
Should they cry to me in
Any distress,
I will hear them and I will
Be their Lord for ever.

Entrance Antiphon for Mass of the Day – March 27, 2025

Dear God, as I think about the reason I am a Christian–to be in right relationship with you with the passage into heaven being an afterthought–I think what Sister Miriam has to say in Restore: A Guided Lent Journal for Prayer and Meditation for today’s entry is affirming:

The Lord has place people in our lives who know us and love us and can understand us to varying degrees, but the Lord is the only one who knows and loves us and understands us fully. God knows us better than we know ourselves, and he receives us completely and continually. God does not reject even the places that we reject within ourselves. He is captivating in his goodness, attentiveness, and gentleness.

Yes! You know me. You understand me. You know when I’m right and why I’m right. You also know when I’m wrong and why I’m wrong. You understand my motivations, both good and bad. You have made a path for me to know you as much as humanly possible and then to be completely known by you and loved by you. You are amazing. You are amazing, God.

Father, help me to live in this love today and offer it to others. Help me to undo the manipulative bargain some think they have made with you to obey you so they can get into heaven and avoid hell, and offer then instead a life lived with you that will one day result in being with you in eternity. The question isn’t, “If you died today, do you know where you’ll spend eternity?” The question should be, “If you encounter shame or guilt today, where will you find love and absolution?” At least, I think that’s what the question should be. Regardless, I know there is a peace in knowing you that I don’t have apart from you. Help me to have that peace with you today, and to offer it to others.

I pray this in Jesus and with your Holy Spirit,

Amen

 
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Posted by on March 27, 2025 in Restore: A Guided Lent Journal for Prayer and Meditation

 

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Psalm 119:133

26 Mar

133 Establish my footsteps in Your word,
And do not let any iniquity have dominion over me.

Psalm 119:133

Dear God, the last part of this one verse is so powerful. My iniquities and their influence over my life is a concept that overwhelms and humbles me. How many of the frustrations I’m experiencing now are a result of my iniquities? My sins?

It doesn’t say that David wrote this psalm, but my first thought goes to David and how his dalliance with Bathsheba (rape?) and then murder of Uriah seems to be the touchstone for his family problems later. That iniquity, though repented of in Psalm 51, seemed to have dominion over the rest of his life and even flowed into history. Amnon was the rightful heir to the throne, but Absalom killed him, led a revolt that ultimately led to his death. And Solomon would never have existed if not for David’s relationship with Bathsheba.

So, what can I pray for this morning? Well, somehow, Solomon was the pathway to Jesus through lineage. There was redemption for this somewhere down the line. Can you somehow use the ripples of the sins I’ve committed to do something positive in this world? Can you protect me from my iniquities and keep them from having dominion over me?

Father, I want to be at peace with the sorrows in my life. I can see where I made mistakes that played a role in my current sorrows, but I still don’t know how I ended up in them to the level I’m at. And it hurts. I hurt. So please be in these situations. Don’t let my mistakes and sins (sometimes mistakes aren’t sins) have dominion over me, the ones I love, or the plans you have for us. Help me to know the path forward, which starts with my very next step.

I pray this in Jesus and with your Holy Spirit,

Amen

 
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Posted by on March 26, 2025 in Psalms, Restore: A Guided Lent Journal for Prayer and Meditation

 

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Collect for Mass of the Day – March 25, 2025

25 Mar

May your grace not
Forsake us, O Lord, we
Pray,
But make us dedicated to
Your holy service
And at all times obtain for
Us your help

Collect for Mass of the Day – March 25, 2025

Dear God, I want to take the grace you have given me and turn it to the world, to serve and to love in your name. Please help me to do this. I think that is what the “Collect for Mass of the Day” is telling me I should think, and I agree. That is a good life.

I guess one question would be, why do I need this external grace from you. If I’m a human who has made mistakes, why can’t I just forgive myself, apologize to those I wronged, if there are any, and then move on. Why do I need forgiveness from you? How does that make my life better?

Those are actually good questions that have vague answers. For the person who doesn’t believe in you, it is my opinion, that they are still grappling with guilt that they cannot absolve themselves. There is something in our psyche that knows that, while we have sinned against others or even our own bodies, the repentance David gave in Psalm 51 after his affair with Bathsheba and murder of Uriah is appropriate when he says that it is against you he has sinned. Again, my opinion, I think there is something in all of us that knows you’re there, at least in some form, and that we are accountable to you. I talked a week or two ago about the man I know who didn’t like the rules you made, so he decided he would remove you from the equation and, thus, remove his own guilt. I think he’s still living by that philosophy, but I don’t think it’s working. I think he is still burdened by his guilt.

And then going back to the “Collect for Mass of the Day,” if I get to a point where I have come to you, repented, and receive absolution from you, then I can take that freedom and offer it to others. I can love them. I can love you.

Father, let me start with repentance. I confess to you, Almighty God, that I have greatly sinned in my thoughts and in my words. In what I have done, and what I have failed to do. Through my fault, through my fault, through my most grievous fault. Therefore I ask the Holy Spirit to pray for me. I am sorry. Thank you for redemption and reconciliation through Jesus. Thank you, Father.

I pray this in Jesus and with your Holy Spirit,

Amen

 
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Posted by on March 25, 2025 in Restore: A Guided Lent Journal for Prayer and Meditation

 

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Psalm 84:2

24 Mar

2 My soul longs, indeed it faints,
    for the courts of the Lord;
my heart and my flesh sing for joy
    to the living God.

Psalm 84:2

Dear God, of course, things like this aren’t written and published on a whim. The psalmist isn’t correcting himself in the first line of this verse. He’s communicating intentionally. It’s like a P.S. at the end of a fundraising letter. The marketing person didn’t forget to tell you something in a letter that was reviewed and edited multiple times before it was sent. The P.S. is intentional to communicate an emotional punctuation at the end of the letter. The same is true for this first line of this verse. I just looked at about five different translations, and while they didn’t all say it like this, they all communicated some sort of emphasis about a desperation for you.

Do I feel that desperate this morning, or am I just going through the motions? If I search my heart honestly, I can see where there is a part of me that is going through the motions, but I am going through these motions because I know that I need you today. I need you this morning. I need you this hour. I need you in this moment. Who am I without you? You created me, and you want relationship with me. I am more than happy to oblige because you teach me love and forgiveness. You teach me your ways. You teach me about you.

In today’s entry from Restore: A Guided Lent Journal for Prayer and Meditation, Sister Miriam focuses on how we long for the thing(s) we gave up during lent as we fast from them, and then talked about replacing the longing for that particular thing to our longing for you. Am I as desperate for you as I am for the thing I gave up for Lent? If I were to give you up for Lent–time with you, prayer, church, podcasts, Bible, music, etc.–who would I be by Easter? I shutter to think.

Father, I love you. I need you. I cannot do this without you. Love others through me. Show me how to offer reconciliation with you to those around me. I am yours. Thank you for being mine.

I pray this in Jesus and with your Holy Spirit,

Amen

 
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Posted by on March 24, 2025 in Psalms, Restore: A Guided Lent Journal for Prayer and Meditation

 

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Ezekiel 36:16-28

23 Mar

16 Again the word of the Lord came to me: 17 “Son of man, when the people of Israel were living in their own land, they defiled it by their conduct and their actions. Their conduct was like a woman’s monthly uncleanness in my sight. 18 So I poured out my wrath on them because they had shed blood in the land and because they had defiled it with their idols. 19 I dispersed them among the nations, and they were scattered through the countries; I judged them according to their conduct and their actions. 20 And wherever they went among the nations they profaned my holy name, for it was said of them, ‘These are the Lord’s people, and yet they had to leave his land.’ 21 I had concern for my holy name, which the people of Israel profaned among the nations where they had gone.

22 “Therefore say to the Israelites, ‘This is what the Sovereign Lord says: It is not for your sake, people of Israel, that I am going to do these things, but for the sake of my holy name, which you have profaned among the nations where you have gone. 23 I will show the holiness of my great name, which has been profaned among the nations, the name you have profaned among them. Then the nations will know that I am the Lord, declares the Sovereign Lord, when I am proved holy through you before their eyes.

24 “‘For I will take you out of the nations; I will gather you from all the countries and bring you back into your own land. 25 I will sprinkle clean water on you, and you will be clean; I will cleanse you from all your impurities and from all your idols. 26 I will give you a new heart and put a new spirit in you; I will remove from you your heart of stone and give you a heart of flesh. 27 And I will put my Spirit in you and move you to follow my decrees and be careful to keep my laws. 28 Then you will live in the land I gave your ancestors; you will be my people, and I will be your God. 

Ezekiel 36:16-38

Dear God, you long for us so much! That’s the weirdest thing about you , in my mind. You long for us so much. I long for my children in a huge way, but you long for us even more. You want us. You want to restore us. You want relationship with us. You want our worship, but it’s so you can pour yourself into us. If you poured yourself into us without our worship, the consequences would be terrible. Who would I be if you just poured yourself into me without me first submitting myself to you? But the big picture is that you want this. It’s so weird!

As I sit here in Kansas this morning, with several hours before I leave for the airport, I have some options. I wasn’t sure what I was going to do. But it’s Sunday. I have a rental car. While I was talking to my wife on the phone this morning, the thought occurred to me, “Why wouldn’t I go to church?” Good question. At home, my wife is Catholic so I attend Catholic church with her, but I’m out here on my own this morning. I can choose whatever I want. So here’s the weird thing. As I looked up churches around me, I found myself being skeptical of worship styles and what I would like and what I wouldn’t, so I ultimately decided it would probably be best if I find a Catholic church.. So I found one less than two miles from me, and I am planning to hit the 8:30 mass. If nothing else, I have a pretty good idea what it will be like, and I know I’ll be able to worship you there.

Father, I want to find a place to corporately worship you this morning. This isn’t for appearances. This isn’t duty. It’s need on my part. Sure, I don’t have to do it, and maybe my day will be fine, but I will be better if I do this. If I find myself worshipping you through joining others to read your word, sing songs to you, and hear a homily prepared by someone who loves you. I will watch others as they take the eucharist, knowing I’m not really that different from the Catholics in the room, but respectful of how they feel about the importance of the eucharist and that I shouldn’t partake if I don’t believe in transubstantiation. I’m looking forward to this. It won’t guarantee me a good day, but it will be a touchpoint with you as I go through my day, and it will give me a better shot of responding in your love and with your Spirit when challenges arise. Be with me today.

I pray this in Jesus and with your Holy Spirit,

Amen

 
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Posted by on March 23, 2025 in Ezekiel, Restore: A Guided Lent Journal for Prayer and Meditation

 

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Collect for Mass of the Day – March 22, 2025

22 Mar 
O God, who grant us
  By glorious healing
  Remedies while still on 
  Earth
To be partakers of the 
  Things of heaven,
Guide us, we pray, through
  This present life
And bring us to that light
  In which you dwell

Collect for Mass of the Day - March 22, 2025

Dear God, it is so evident to me that we are damaged. All of us. It reminds of me the poem "This be the Verse" by Philip Larkin. I know I've mentioned this in prayers before: 

They [mess] you up, your mum and dad.   
    They may not mean to, but they do.   
They fill you with the faults they had
    And add some extra, just for you.

But they were [messed] up in their turn
    By fools in old-style hats and coats,   
Who half the time were soppy-stern
    And half at one another’s throats.

Man hands on misery to man.
    It deepens like a coastal shelf.
Get out as early as you can,
    And don’t have any kids yourself.

It started with Adam and Eve and it trickles into today. I don’t agree with the last line of this poem, that we shouldn’t have any kids ourselves. But I fear that is the sentiment todays youth are carrying into adulthood. When they see the pain they feel hopeless. Like the world is doomed. And I’ll admit that I would not want to raise a child in the current technological world, much less the one that will be around in 10-20 years from now.

So what do we do now? From the collect of the mass today, we look for your glorious healing. I was just talking with someone about what we are selling when we present your Gospel. Is it fire insurance–rescue from hell–or is it healing now. Receiving forgiveness. Learning how to extend forgiveness. Receiving your “remedies while still on earth.” “To be partakers in the things of heaven.” To be part of your kingdom coming and your will being done on earth as it is in heaven.

Going back to the poem, it’s the last stanza that needs your redemption. That’s where Mr. Larkin is missing you. The deepening of the coastal shelf will happen without you, but with you–with your grace, both received and given–that coastal shelf will be filled in and the children we bring into the world will have the opportunity to bring that grace forward. Oh, Father, help me to be part of bringing your grace forward through my reception of your grace and then extending it to others.

I pray this in Jesus and with your Holy Spirit,

Amen

 
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Posted by on March 22, 2025 in Restore: A Guided Lent Journal for Prayer and Meditation

 

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Psalm 31:1-2

21 Mar

Psalm 31

For the director of music. A psalm of David.

1 In you, Lord, I have taken refuge;
    let me never be put to shame;
    deliver me in your righteousness.
2 Turn your ear to me,
    come quickly to my rescue;
be my rock of refuge,
    a strong fortress to save me.

Dear God, I was talking with a relative yesterday, and she was recounting a conversation she had recently had with a friend. The friend was telling her about a lot of therapy work she’d been doing over the last year and uncovering and dealing with a lot of childhood trauma. Ultimately, she told my relative something to the effect that she didn’t believe in you anymore because she didn’t know why you don’t stop things like that. How can a good God allow so much pain?

It’s an age-old question. Job asked it. His friends errantly told him that his suffering was a result of his sin, and he rejected that explanation. But he fussed at you. He demanded you answer him and explain yourself. Funny, how I keep coming back to the whole thing about people expecting you to explain yourself to them. It’s starting to reveal itself as a theme during these Lenten journals. C.S. Lewis wrote a whole book about it called The Problem of Pain. I think it’s something we all struggle to answer because we want to be a good and loving God would never allow such things.

So what was my answer to my relative? Well, I hope it was okay. I simply said that one question to ask her friend is what she would have you do. How would she like for God to respond to pain in the world? Should you kill bad actors? Should you stop all natural disasters? If this were a Bruce Almighty situation and she had your power for a day, how would she use it? And once you decide to start killing bad actors who do the worst of crimes, where do you draw the line and what are the limits? I guess the ultimate question would be, why did you create any of this at all? Why did you create us just to have us suffer?

Sister Miriam had a nice paragraph today in her book Restore: A Guided Lent Journal for Prayer and Meditation. She said, “As painful as life has been for us in moments, God is not our enemy. God is only good and offers goodness. He understands our pain and sorrow, our anger and rage. He is not afraid of it, disgusted by it, or deterred by it.” I like that.

Father, help me to represent you well today. Help me to show everyone around me how good you are. Help me to offer reconciliation with you to them. It starts with my own heart loving you well, worshipping you, and being wholly yours. So, I offer myself to you today. I am yours. This day is not about me or what I can get out of the day. It’s about what I can give to this day. Help me to offer you as a refuge for those who are scared and hurting. Help me to remind others who worship you of how good you are. Use me, Father. I’m here to offer myself to you as best as I know how.

I pray this in Jesus and with your Holy Spirit,

Amen

 
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Posted by on March 21, 2025 in Psalms, Restore: A Guided Lent Journal for Prayer and Meditation

 

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