² My soul longs, indeed it faints,
    for the courts of the Lord;
my heart and my flesh sing for joy
    to the living God.

Psalm 84:2

Dear God, of course, things like this aren’t written and published on a whim. The psalmist isn’t correcting himself in the first line of this verse. He’s communicating intentionally. It’s like a P.S. at the end of a fundraising letter. The marketing person didn’t forget to tell you something in a letter that was reviewed and edited multiple times before it was sent. The P.S. is intentional to communicate an emotional punctuation at the end of the letter. The same is true for this first line of this verse. I just looked at about five different translations, and while they didn’t all say it like this, they all communicated some sort of emphasis about a desperation for you.

Do I feel that desperate this morning, or am I just going through the motions? If I search my heart honestly, I can see where there is a part of me that is going through the motions, but I am going through these motions because I know that I need you today. I need you this morning. I need you this hour. I need you in this moment. Who am I without you? You created me, and you want relationship with me. I am more than happy to oblige because you teach me love and forgiveness. You teach me your ways. You teach me about you.

In today’s entry from Restore: A Guided Lent Journal for Prayer and Meditation, Sister Miriam focuses on how we long for the thing(s) we gave up during lent as we fast from them, and then talked about replacing the longing for that particular thing to our longing for you. Am I as desperate for you as I am for the thing I gave up for Lent? If I were to give you up for Lent–time with you, prayer, church, podcasts, Bible, music, etc.–who would I be by Easter? I shutter to think.

Father, I love you. I need you. I cannot do this without you. Love others through me. Show me how to offer reconciliation with you to those around me. I am yours. Thank you for being mine.

I pray this in Jesus and with your Holy Spirit,

Amen