¹² Yet even now, says the Lord,
    return to me with all your heart,
with fasting, with weeping, and with mourning;
¹³     rend your hearts and not your clothing.
Return to the Lord your God,
    for he is gracious and merciful,
slow to anger, abounding in steadfast love,
    and relenting from punishment.

Joel 2:12-13

Dear God, this is the passage from Sister Miriam in Restore: A Guided Lent Journal for Prayer and Meditation. I don’t know that much about Joel as a prophet or as a book, so I went back to read the introduction in my NIV Study Bible from the 1980s. When describing the overall message of the book, the NIV Study Bible says at the end, “…he describes the day as one of punishment for unfaithful Israel as well. Restoration and blessing will come only after judgment and repentance.”

Oh, God, can I skip the judgment and just go to repentance? Does judgment have to come first? Coincidentally, I was talking with my wife yesterday about standing before you at judgment day. What will you say? How horrifying will it be to stand before you, even with Jesus’s blood covering me to atone for my sins? Will you make an account of my sins, or will you give me a pass? What will that look like?

Then there is our country now. I’ve talked about my conversations with friends about our country and how things are currently going. I have no idea what to make of what is happening at a national level. I know there are plans. I know they are being executed. Will the ultimate results of them be good, bad, or just kicking the can down the road one more election cycle? Will they give the Christian church that has thrown its weight behind the current administration the power it craves and finish off its corruption, thereby causing its collapse and leaving those faithful to you as a remnant? Will the church and the country have to take three steps back in order to start moving forward again?

This all plays into Joel’s call to return to you. All of us start to create idols. Idols of power. Idols of money and what we think is security. Idols of our spouses and our children. I could go on and on. And you will allow our idols to fail. You will allow pain. You will allow us to wander away so that we might come to the end of ourselves. What kind of judgment from you will be waiting for me at the end of my rope? Will it be as Joel describes here, or will it be more like the Prodigal Father who waits for his son to come home after he’s learned how much he needs his father.

Father, my God, I love you and I am grateful for you. Forgive me of my sins as I forgive those who sin against me. Lead me away from temptation. Deliver me from evil. Give me my daily bread–no more and no less. You are the one and only glorious God. Once again, I love you.

I pray this in Jesus and with your Holy Spirit,

Amen