¹⁸ Timothy, my son, here are my instructions for you, based on the prophetic words spoken about you earlier. May they help you fight well in the Lord’s battles. ¹⁹ Cling to your faith in Christ, and keep your conscience clear. For some people have deliberately violated their consciences; as a result, their faith has been shipwrecked. ²⁰ Hymenaeus and Alexander are two examples. I threw them out and handed them over to Satan so they might learn not to blaspheme God.

1 Timothy 1:18-20

Dear God, the actual verse of the day today was 1 Timothy 2:1-2 on Bible Gateway, but when I went back to chapter 1 to get the context for why Paul was telling Timothy that, I found this paragraph. Verse 19 is where my head it today. Cling to my faith in you. Keep my conscience clear. I feel like those are my marching orders today. This is one of those times in my life when my spirit and heart “pretty much” believe what I am saying, but not completely. I “pretty much” have faith that you are in control and you aren’t letting anything happen that is beyond your will. I “pretty much” believe that the outcomes I see around me are within your plan for the world. But I guess this path just makes me sad. I don’t like it. I don’t want to walk it. I know the path I wanted, and while it was far from perfect it was known to me and I felt like I knew my way through it. Now I’m in a situation where I am not sure how to go forward.

So what I’ve told people is that my only job is to wake up in the morning, worship you, pray, and then go about my day loving everyone around me as much as possible, all while testifying to the gospel of your grace. And I “pretty much” believe that. Maybe it’s just a little grief I’m experiencing. Maybe I’m just a little sad. Maybe that’s why I’m just “pretty much” there and not all there. Maybe in another week or two I will be less sad and really living out completely what I’m just “pretty much” living out now.

Father, I have a day ahead of me. I need to visit a friend in the hospital. I need to go to a training in another town. I need to lead the people with whom I work. I need to love everyone I see. I need to take you to the world and represent you to them. I need to pray for my coworkers, volunteers, donors, and clients who are in pain. Who are recovering from surgeries. Who are facing family problems. And I do. I lift them up to you now. For my those I know in mourning (I have two that lost loved ones in the last week), I pray for their comfort and provision. For those I know facing physical challenges, I pray for their healing and provision. For those I know who are facing financial, emotional, parenting, etc. challenges, I pray for their provision, peace, and guidance. I pray that all of us will move from “pretty much” to “completely.” And for those who have made an idol out of who won and who lost the election and looked to that outcome as a source of their love, joy, peace, etc. instead of you, I pray for repentance and a turning of our hearts towards you.

I pray this in Jesus and with your Holy Spirit,

Amen