Understand this, my dear brothers and sisters: You must all be quick to listen, slow to speak, and slow to get angry.

James 1:19

Dear God, James is correct that listening is the key, and oh, how I can be a bad listener. I love to talk. It’s probably a function of my insecurity. I want people to hear what I have to say, but I have got to be better about listening. Even when showing someone the nonprofit where I work, while giving a tour I know I should be asking them questions about themselves and trying to gauge how much interest they have in our work versus the work of another nonprofit, but I just sit there and yammer on about what we do. Yes, I am a bad listener.

But I think the key to what James is saying here is that being slow to anger and loving others is a function of good listening and compassion. When I think about it, my anger is usually driven by the decisions other people make. It’s hard to think of a time that I was angry and it was NOT related to something someone did. But if I can sit there and really listen to someone else, even people I don’t know like politicians, and understand why they are making the decisions they are making, it will be more likely to engage my empathy and then that will drive my sympathy for their point of view. Very few people are bad, evil people. Almost always, they are being driven by forces that are unseen by me, but in their mind the forces make their decision obviously right instead of obviously wrong, as I see it.

Father, this is a lesson of which I need to be reminded over and over again. Help me to remember to seek you and pray through difficult situations with others in real time. Help me to listen to them and to process the text and the subtext of what they are saying. Help me to be strong in empathy and slow to anger. Help me to draw on the grace that you give me as I try to extend grace and love to others.

In Jesus’ name I pray,

Amen