I was riding my bike this week and this classic song came on my ipod (yes, I’m probably the only person in the world who works out to Dan Fogelberg). I listened carefully to the lyrics and they are beautiful. So in the spirit of some of the posts I have done on this blog about different hymns and songs and the depth of their meaning, here are some thoughts on “Leader of the Band”.

Dan Fogelberg wrote this song for his dad, Lawrence Fogelberg. The song released in 1981 and Lawrence passed away in 1982 meaning that he got to hear one of the sweetest tributes a dad could receive from his son or daughter (incidentally, I poked around the Internet and found a cover that Lucie Arnaz did of this song for her dad, Desi).

Here are the lyrics (and here’s a link to a youtube video complete with lyrics)

“Leader of the Band” – By Dan Fogelberg

A lonely child alone and wild
A cabinet maker’s son
His hands were meant for different work
And his heart was known to none
He left his home and went his lone
And solitary way
And he gave to me a gift I know
I never can repay

A quiet man of music
Denied a simpler fate
He tried to be a soldier once
But his music wouldn’t wait
He earned his love through discipline
A thundering velvet hand
His gentle means of sculpting souls
Took me years to understand

The leader of the band is tired
And his eyes are growing old
But his blood runs through my instrument
And his song is in my soul
My life has been a poor attempt
To imitate the man
I’m just a living legacy
To the leader of the band

My brothers’ lives were different
For they heard another call
One went to Chicago
And the other to St. Paul
And I’m in Colorado
When I’m not in some hotel
Living out this life I’ve chosen
And come to know so well

I thank you for the music
And your stories of the road
I thank you for the freedom
When it came my time to go
I thank you for your kindness
And the times when you got tough
And Papa, I don’t think I’ve said,
“I love you,” near enough

The leader of the band is tired
And his eyes are growing old
But his blood runs through my instrument
And his song is in my soul
My life has been a poor attempt
To imitate the man
I’m just a living legacy
To the leader of the band
I am the living legacy
To the leader of the band

I saw a 2003 video of Dan performing this song and he said that if he had only been allowed to write one song in his life it would be this one. Before I go any further, here’s a link to an interview done in March 1982 with Dan’s dad, Lawrence Fogelberg, the Leader of the Band. (You’ll probably want to copy and paste it into a word processor because the font is hard to read with the background.)

So let’s look at this song and see what it tells us

• Verse 1a: It seems that Lawrence communicated to Dan at some point that he felt like he (Lawrence) didn’t fit in as a child. He felt different from his family and Dan says at the end of this stanza that he got a gift from his dad that he can’t repay. I wonder if that gift is the peace of knowing that it is okay to be himself, even if that made him different from his brothers.
• Verse 1b: Lawrence was a high school and college band director. In the 1982 interview he says that the thundering velvet hand was his perfectionism with his students, but he was careful to add that he never belittled a student in front of the rest of the band. It seems that Dan came to appreciate how lawrence molded his students’ lives.
• Verse 2a: It’s interesting that Dan moves from talking about his dad’s students to talking about himself and his brothers. It is apparent that he felt the difference in how they were pursuing their lives. I think there’s something in all of us that tries to figure out our place in our families and how we fit in. I figure that Dan probably got some of his peace about who he was from his knowledge that the musical part of him came from his dad.
• Verse 2b: First, as a dad, I can’t wait for the day when my children thank me for being tough. Frankly, it’s hard to imagine. But the big thing I get from this verse is that Dan felt his father’s blessing. My dad has blessed me to live my own life, and it is his greatest gift to me. I hope I am able to give it to my children.
• Chorus: The interview I linked to above was done in March 1982. I don’t know what caused it, but Lawrence died later that year. Perhaps he was terminally ill and that is what Dan meant when he said that his dad was tired. It feels like he had a bond with his dad by the time he died that was beautiful. I am sure there was pain in their past together. I am sure there were scars. But somehow love, forgiveness, and acceptance took over.

I am a sucker for father/son stories. I am blessed with two parents who are loving and supportive of me beyond reason, and the tribute that Dan pays to his father here is beautiful. It’s hard to imagine the joy Lawrence must have felt when he heard “Leader of the Band” for the first time.